Seriously. Maybe you have a small house, or maybe you aren’t too happy with you current living situation. But you probably still have a kitchen, right? I encourage you to tour your kitchen (not to clean, just to look around for a bit.) Now, run your hand along the Formica/sillstone/granite counter top. Run the water in the sink for a sec. Enjoy the familiarity of those late night fridge visits where you may have feed a noisy kitty some wet food at 3 a.m. Or get yourself a glass of water. Nice that you know where things are. Maybe you’ve told a guest: "Top right shelf, next to the microwave" whilst directing someone to get a wineglass. Maybe you’ve a fond personal kitchen memory- like how parties always seem to magically gravitate into that room. (Hey, it’s why I usually gravitate towards that room. It’s the social hub, and closest to the fridge. It's where the booze and booze mixer’s live.) Maybe you’ve relived the naughty kitchen scene in the early part of "Fatal Attraction" Get that memory in your head.
Why the sense memory exercise, you probably aren’t asking?
In one week from today, our cabby-cabinets are getting delivered. We have officially been without a "kitchen" for the past 4 months. I was reminded of this last night as I was washing vegetables in the bathroom sink, then heading downstairs to do dishes in the (nasty) old Laundry sink. I thought that despite the exorbitant fee we paid for the kitchen, it’s gonna be so worth it when we get a kitchen again. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a caveman boy scout- so the jury-rigged kitchen set up we’re using now is sufficient…but I’m getting a we bit tired of the upstairs/downstairs crap. Barring any damage to the boxes, and structural crap that would act as a preventative…we’ll be back in the modern age in 2.5 weeks. (Homer impression)
"Mmmmmmmm…. Fatal Attraction Kitchen Scene."
Thursday, April 28, 2005
I gotta get this out...
Cause it's on mental replay, and it's killing me.
[singing] Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight Gonna grab some afternoon delight My motto's always been 'when it's right, it's right' Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night? When everything's a little clearer in the light of day And we know the night is always gonna be there any way Thinkin' of you's workin' up my appetite Looking forward to a little afternoon delight Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ingite And the thought of lovin' you is getting so exciting Sky rockets in flight Afternoon delight Afternoon delight Afternoon delight
[singing] Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight Gonna grab some afternoon delight My motto's always been 'when it's right, it's right' Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night? When everything's a little clearer in the light of day And we know the night is always gonna be there any way Thinkin' of you's workin' up my appetite Looking forward to a little afternoon delight Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ingite And the thought of lovin' you is getting so exciting Sky rockets in flight Afternoon delight Afternoon delight Afternoon delight
Wednesday, April 27, 2005
A good nude day.
Stallone used that term in an interview he conducted during the filming of "Demolition Man". (Regarding his pseudo-full frontal male nudity scene where his character gets cryogenically frozen in Astroglide.) I thought of that today as I went to shower this morning and caught a glimpse of myself in le'mirror. Looking through my puffy morning eyes, and giving myself the tummy slaps and love handle pinches that accompany my dysmorphic ritual behavior, I mentally remarked "Wouldn't it be nice to maintain this weight throughout the day? To feel this good. To put on my khaki pants and use a belt because they kinda feel looser." (And not "Maybe you want to think about investing in a size up? Have you thought of the joy of elastic?") I've noticed that cutting down on the booze significantly helps, but boy have I felt kinda crabby. Hello full moon. It is funny though, I can't help that Lester Burnham said it best: "I want to look good naked."
Narcissistic, and craves attention. He's a winner folks.
Narcissistic, and craves attention. He's a winner folks.
Yar...Thar be dancers!
The dance studio J works for took home all sorts of trophies for her "Alice and Wonderland" number last weekend at the competition. (Remember? Painting the poles?) She brought home some audio of the critiques which we listened to whilst building our 2nd bookshelf, and I learned that it is ultimately the best criticism when the judges say nothing at all. (I guess it means that they are in to it. The few comments they would start to say would just sort of …end. Kinda cool, actually.) It reminded me of one recital I attended way back in ‘93, which had a funny ending.
I was dating a gal who wanted me to go watch her friend’s dance competition at MGJH. (Strangely enough, the same auditorium that I saw J’s first directing/’ographing effort the year prior- West Side Story. Kismet!) Apparently it was a "high end" dance studio that caters more towards putting on theatrical numbers, rather than just a bunch of kids in tights flopping around for medals. Their main theme for the 17-18 year old set was "Hook" and they had onstage this YUGE repro of a pirate ship (Rich parents=Rich sets) which all the dancers flipped and flapped and did dance #’s around the score of that crappy, crappy movie.
In true pirate-y fashion, a majority of these gals were dressed as wenches, complete with the "off the shoulder bodice", corset, kerchief, and skirt. A s I watched this (insert sarcasm) fascinating show, I coulda swore I saw one rather endowed dancers…ahem, nip. I whispered this to my date, which only inspired a shhh! And a well placed elbow to my arm. So, I kept on watching (And yes, checking the aforementioned busty pirate wench when she came into view) until she came prancing across the stage, performing a running split leap "Russian"…and when she landed "FLOOP" out she comes. (Yes, that way.) And I swear to God, all of the camera flashes in the audience went off almost simultaneously...A veritable cacophony of flashes. Ironic huh? Flashes at a flasher. Well, poor girl went sprinting off stage…never to appear for the remainder of the show. My date was, agog. I was a-laughing my butt off. Yo-ho.
I told this to J and she said, "Well. Shit like that happens. It’s not all eyelashes and tights."
I was dating a gal who wanted me to go watch her friend’s dance competition at MGJH. (Strangely enough, the same auditorium that I saw J’s first directing/’ographing effort the year prior- West Side Story. Kismet!) Apparently it was a "high end" dance studio that caters more towards putting on theatrical numbers, rather than just a bunch of kids in tights flopping around for medals. Their main theme for the 17-18 year old set was "Hook" and they had onstage this YUGE repro of a pirate ship (Rich parents=Rich sets) which all the dancers flipped and flapped and did dance #’s around the score of that crappy, crappy movie.
In true pirate-y fashion, a majority of these gals were dressed as wenches, complete with the "off the shoulder bodice", corset, kerchief, and skirt. A s I watched this (insert sarcasm) fascinating show, I coulda swore I saw one rather endowed dancers…ahem, nip. I whispered this to my date, which only inspired a shhh! And a well placed elbow to my arm. So, I kept on watching (And yes, checking the aforementioned busty pirate wench when she came into view) until she came prancing across the stage, performing a running split leap "Russian"…and when she landed "FLOOP" out she comes. (Yes, that way.) And I swear to God, all of the camera flashes in the audience went off almost simultaneously...A veritable cacophony of flashes. Ironic huh? Flashes at a flasher. Well, poor girl went sprinting off stage…never to appear for the remainder of the show. My date was, agog. I was a-laughing my butt off. Yo-ho.
I told this to J and she said, "Well. Shit like that happens. It’s not all eyelashes and tights."
Tuesday, April 26, 2005
Mister Fancy Pants
So, at this party last Saturday I decided to dress a little dressier and don a tie and dapper lined slacks w/a leather blazer. Peeps were cappin' on me for gussy-ing up for a party (Okay, they were mostly asking why I got so "dressed-up") which I really technically didn't feel was all that dressed up. Really, I live only 10 blocks due West of them, and since I really had time to do it, I did it. No spectac reason. I just figured it was time to gussy up. Now, this isn't really as big of a deal as I'd thought, but it looks like I'm not the only one to go this fashion route.
Scary. I didn't even know how to tie a tie until 6 or 7 years ago, and I taught m'self. And since the formal wear store has a business dress code for employee's, it's forced me to get saavy on trends and styles despite my initial reluctance to take the job seriously. (Except when I don't feel like tying a tie, then I can just clip on one of he laydown models. Easy Peasy Japan-easy.)
Scary. I didn't even know how to tie a tie until 6 or 7 years ago, and I taught m'self. And since the formal wear store has a business dress code for employee's, it's forced me to get saavy on trends and styles despite my initial reluctance to take the job seriously. (Except when I don't feel like tying a tie, then I can just clip on one of he laydown models. Easy Peasy Japan-easy.)
I did it again...
I had a cookie. It was Chips Ahoy. Super Chunk. I’m a weak, weak man.
But…it’s no "Monster Thick Burger". I mean, Jeezus Pleasus, 1,417 calories and 107 GRAMS OF FAT? That’s your daily allowance and then some in one freakin’ sammy! That thing looks like it would afright Homer Simpson. (btw: Spencer's Gift has a great T-shirt of Homer in a Sombrero that says "There's a 'New' Mexico now?") For all my healthy-health readers out there who don’t always have time to prep food, there is a great link on the site for "Fast Food Nutritional Information" here. Give it a whirl or a print if you need reminded of how bad some big name fast food joints want to make us look…bad. Scary.
J’s been getting tempted by some of the older cats in her show who have been subscribing to the Atkins diet. Now, if you are pretty portly and you think ketosis (*) will work for you, go ahead- It’s a quick fix that works for the short haul. I’m saying that cutting down/out refined sugars, and dragging your butt outside to go for a walk can help too. So does hitting an old gypsy in your car on a deserted road. (Thanks Geef. Where was my head?) Anyway, she smacked her own butt last night trying to prove some point, and for the life of me, I forgot what she was talking about.
*Letting your body use the protein to keep muscle and the fat for it’s energy stores (Instead of Carbs which would promote the krebs cycle to act as the energy catalyst.. This is what a bodybuilder will do "pre" competition to promote vascularity and definition. Please note, that having a diet that entirely consists of protein can potentially place undue stress on your kidneys. (Which is why test studies have shown that in certain individuals with a higher protein intake in their diet have an increased capacity for acquiring diabetes and kidney stones.) I talked J out of it after I said we were having bacon-wrapped chicken on a pork-chop bun for dinner, and tomorrow we’d have ground sausage coffee in a turkey breast filter with extra soy. She was, (ahem), not amused.
But…it’s no "Monster Thick Burger". I mean, Jeezus Pleasus, 1,417 calories and 107 GRAMS OF FAT? That’s your daily allowance and then some in one freakin’ sammy! That thing looks like it would afright Homer Simpson. (btw: Spencer's Gift has a great T-shirt of Homer in a Sombrero that says "There's a 'New' Mexico now?") For all my healthy-health readers out there who don’t always have time to prep food, there is a great link on the site for "Fast Food Nutritional Information" here. Give it a whirl or a print if you need reminded of how bad some big name fast food joints want to make us look…bad. Scary.
J’s been getting tempted by some of the older cats in her show who have been subscribing to the Atkins diet. Now, if you are pretty portly and you think ketosis (*) will work for you, go ahead- It’s a quick fix that works for the short haul. I’m saying that cutting down/out refined sugars, and dragging your butt outside to go for a walk can help too. So does hitting an old gypsy in your car on a deserted road. (Thanks Geef. Where was my head?) Anyway, she smacked her own butt last night trying to prove some point, and for the life of me, I forgot what she was talking about.
*Letting your body use the protein to keep muscle and the fat for it’s energy stores (Instead of Carbs which would promote the krebs cycle to act as the energy catalyst.. This is what a bodybuilder will do "pre" competition to promote vascularity and definition. Please note, that having a diet that entirely consists of protein can potentially place undue stress on your kidneys. (Which is why test studies have shown that in certain individuals with a higher protein intake in their diet have an increased capacity for acquiring diabetes and kidney stones.) I talked J out of it after I said we were having bacon-wrapped chicken on a pork-chop bun for dinner, and tomorrow we’d have ground sausage coffee in a turkey breast filter with extra soy. She was, (ahem), not amused.
Monday, April 25, 2005
Bite me Bauer (Sunday Post)
I shopped…BITCHES! I wear most of my clothes until they fall off. This was pointed out to me last Friday when a co-worked tactfully noticed that I had "2 holes in the butt of my jeans". (sigh…I "Hulked Out" of yet another pair of Gap Jeans) My other jeans have matching holes right by the saddlebags, so guess what that means? On to Rosedale (By proximity, our new mall of choice.) for new jeans!
Armed with old gift cards and gift receipts I went, needing only 2 pair of jeans: 1st, to JCPenis for the Levi 5-fittys for the black jeans, and then to Gap for the "relaxed fit" blues. I passed Eddie Bauers on the way in, givinge them a "mental middle finger" for the atrocious pair of short tight black "make-me- feel- fat" pants I received one X-mas from an ex’s obviously vindictive mother. Levi’s have always been my jean of choice since Jr High school, only recently supplanted by said Gap jeans within the last 8 years or so. (I need variety in my pants…Oooooooo another euphemism)
BOOM- Hit up the Pen-Pen, find my jeans and do the decidedly Un-P thing and try the sumbitches on- They fit…effortlessly. Eddie Bauer can sniff my chode. (The original title of today’s blog) A few practice kicks in the mirror later and I’m heading to check out, buuuut not before snatching two shirts off the discount 70% off rack and a U of MN hat. Ski-U-Mah, bitches.
I scamper to Gap to find my jeans. FUCK, they’ve renamed "relaxed fit"- "easy fit". Are they the same? I panic, but quickly find the courage to live dangerously. I don’t even bother trying them on. They’ll fit, oh yeah…they’ll fit. I grab J a pin that says, well, "J", just to be cute. I pay, then head up to Suncoast where I read the Episode III graphic novel. (Yeah, I know how it ends, I just wanted to see if it would be cool. Yes, it looks cool. ) Now, over to Abercrombie and the Bitch to try and use the gc I've been sitting on for 2 years. - Ugh, it all looks like little kid clothes. I last (literally) 10 seconds before succumbing to the cheesiness , stoopid "nst-nst-nst-whoop, whoop" techno background beat, so I l. The employee’s look zombified. I pity them. Then start to pity myself for working part time retail. Well, at least I don’t have techno in the background. Regardless, I still can’t find anything in that shitty store...bleargh.
Yee HAW!!! I’m out of there, and there’s still daylight left for a run. Another be-yootiful and productive Sunday. Later that night, J and I have a date for "Anchorman"
Which, if you haven’t seen it, is freaking hilarious. Will Ferrell is the 2nd coming. "Eat the cat poop!!! Poop Mouth!!!" I’m still humming "Skyrockets in Flight."
Armed with old gift cards and gift receipts I went, needing only 2 pair of jeans: 1st, to JCPenis for the Levi 5-fittys for the black jeans, and then to Gap for the "relaxed fit" blues. I passed Eddie Bauers on the way in, givinge them a "mental middle finger" for the atrocious pair of short tight black "make-me- feel- fat" pants I received one X-mas from an ex’s obviously vindictive mother. Levi’s have always been my jean of choice since Jr High school, only recently supplanted by said Gap jeans within the last 8 years or so. (I need variety in my pants…Oooooooo another euphemism)
BOOM- Hit up the Pen-Pen, find my jeans and do the decidedly Un-P thing and try the sumbitches on- They fit…effortlessly. Eddie Bauer can sniff my chode. (The original title of today’s blog) A few practice kicks in the mirror later and I’m heading to check out, buuuut not before snatching two shirts off the discount 70% off rack and a U of MN hat. Ski-U-Mah, bitches.
I scamper to Gap to find my jeans. FUCK, they’ve renamed "relaxed fit"- "easy fit". Are they the same? I panic, but quickly find the courage to live dangerously. I don’t even bother trying them on. They’ll fit, oh yeah…they’ll fit. I grab J a pin that says, well, "J", just to be cute. I pay, then head up to Suncoast where I read the Episode III graphic novel. (Yeah, I know how it ends, I just wanted to see if it would be cool. Yes, it looks cool. ) Now, over to Abercrombie and the Bitch to try and use the gc I've been sitting on for 2 years. - Ugh, it all looks like little kid clothes. I last (literally) 10 seconds before succumbing to the cheesiness , stoopid "nst-nst-nst-whoop, whoop" techno background beat, so I l. The employee’s look zombified. I pity them. Then start to pity myself for working part time retail. Well, at least I don’t have techno in the background. Regardless, I still can’t find anything in that shitty store...bleargh.
Yee HAW!!! I’m out of there, and there’s still daylight left for a run. Another be-yootiful and productive Sunday. Later that night, J and I have a date for "Anchorman"
Which, if you haven’t seen it, is freaking hilarious. Will Ferrell is the 2nd coming. "Eat the cat poop!!! Poop Mouth!!!" I’m still humming "Skyrockets in Flight."
Whee Doggies...
Wild ass weekend kids. I wondered to myself why it seemed like such a heinous anus week, and what did see to my surprise but: A full moon rising. (Batty behavior ensues. You work in enough call centers and you can actually trend this) So much went down this weekend, I’ll try cutting it into bite sized portions:
Friday- Yup. I saw Devil Inside at the Starting Gate w/Kaiser and Tallen. That folks, was my kind of show. Funny, dark, and it clipped along at a fine pace. If you haven’t seen the show yet, do yourself a favor and get out there before they close. On another note, I was getting coffee during intermission and this big fucked up "paper-man" was waltzing by outside. Seriously, I thought I was loosing my mind (Imagine a big square box with a face, over a human body. Now cover that with loose-leaf paper top to bottom.) He was out side the front by all the smokers. Not a good Idea for someone so combustible to be fraternizing next to open flame. I’m just sayin…
Saturday-
Relaxed. Just…relaxed. It was brilliant. Got a nice work out in, got some dojo time. Next thing I knew, my day was nearly gone and I still had errands to run. I had expected the aforementioned K and T superstars to stop over before the Wright-ner party, however a personal emergency arose which required their immediate attention. (Read yestiddy' blog) The party was pretty darn fun*- only embarrassing myself slightly less than normal by talking to much. I injured one person (Sorry again Stoney. A prick from a prick…and I only meant to get your attention.) made another happy (Got M2 his "Red" picture) and wound up seeing the Macho-Geef Randy Savage with all his damn definition. Strange…he grows thinner, and more defined…as I grow stout, and doughier..? He must be absorbing my pow-AH! I left, full of salmon bits (Maybe it was cat food? I wouldn’ta cared anyway) And the only downer I could think of was Jabas arrival spoiled what potentially could have been a rare, and delightful make out session between two ladies. It would have been glorious. My shouts of displeasure at his ill-timed arrival brought many of the guests into the living room to view my plight. (This last part is funnier if you read it with a "John Houseman" type accent.)
Dude, P, seriously: Your "center of attention" problem needs to cease. Freak.
Sunday next…
* Parties like that remind me of why I am eternally grateful to have a hilarious, loving, and dysfunctional extended family like ours in the TC small theatre scene.
Friday- Yup. I saw Devil Inside at the Starting Gate w/Kaiser and Tallen. That folks, was my kind of show. Funny, dark, and it clipped along at a fine pace. If you haven’t seen the show yet, do yourself a favor and get out there before they close. On another note, I was getting coffee during intermission and this big fucked up "paper-man" was waltzing by outside. Seriously, I thought I was loosing my mind (Imagine a big square box with a face, over a human body. Now cover that with loose-leaf paper top to bottom.) He was out side the front by all the smokers. Not a good Idea for someone so combustible to be fraternizing next to open flame. I’m just sayin…
Saturday-
Relaxed. Just…relaxed. It was brilliant. Got a nice work out in, got some dojo time. Next thing I knew, my day was nearly gone and I still had errands to run. I had expected the aforementioned K and T superstars to stop over before the Wright-ner party, however a personal emergency arose which required their immediate attention. (Read yestiddy' blog) The party was pretty darn fun*- only embarrassing myself slightly less than normal by talking to much. I injured one person (Sorry again Stoney. A prick from a prick…and I only meant to get your attention.) made another happy (Got M2 his "Red" picture) and wound up seeing the Macho-Geef Randy Savage with all his damn definition. Strange…he grows thinner, and more defined…as I grow stout, and doughier..? He must be absorbing my pow-AH! I left, full of salmon bits (Maybe it was cat food? I wouldn’ta cared anyway) And the only downer I could think of was Jabas arrival spoiled what potentially could have been a rare, and delightful make out session between two ladies. It would have been glorious. My shouts of displeasure at his ill-timed arrival brought many of the guests into the living room to view my plight. (This last part is funnier if you read it with a "John Houseman" type accent.)
Dude, P, seriously: Your "center of attention" problem needs to cease. Freak.
Sunday next…
* Parties like that remind me of why I am eternally grateful to have a hilarious, loving, and dysfunctional extended family like ours in the TC small theatre scene.
Sunday, April 24, 2005
Send positive thoughts...
I just wanted to wish a speedy recovery to a guy I credit with introducing me to this daily diatribe. G Seven had a pretty tough weekend, so please send thoughts of a speedy recovery to him, and also his family Kaiser and Raven. Feel better soon G. They are releasing Batman Begins 2 days early. This should give ya something to write about, huh?
We now continue with our regularly scheduled blog-cast.
P
We now continue with our regularly scheduled blog-cast.
P
Friday, April 22, 2005
I was about to write something pithy for Friday.
About the big kid day job-
(The ladies in policy accounting crack me up. 7 of them have joined weight watchers and are acting as moral support for each other. They’re always power-walking through our building and counting "points". Also, I think the big-dog bosses daughter who works in re-insurability has been checking me out. This is not my imagination, and has been confirmed like a bigfoot siting.)
About my weekend-
(I’m seeing TDI tonight w/Kwaiser and Talon. Tomorrow is a party at my neighbors…fun to say, "At my neighbors"…Saturday also marks J’s last "Anything Goes" @ the Chan! And I get a much needed private lesson at the Dojo, ‘cause- that’s right, I ain’t working tomorrow afternoon)
About my family-
(They’re nuts. And my big brother is buying a house in Prior LAKE!!!??)
‘Bout J-
(I love that girl. She’s gonna be a Napkin or something in B & B)
‘Bout the cookie I snuck
(J caught me red handed. I swear that cookie was talking to me. Chips a-mothafuckin-HOY!!!!)
Yet, job #2 kicked my ass so hard last night with a ridiculous amount of customers: (40+ and I was the only one working!) That when I left- (Which was considerably later than I’ve ever left) It felt like I had been kicked in the stomach multiple times…and, um, since I’ve been kicked in the stomach multiple times before, I can tell you with SOME authority: Really Sucks. And really hurts too. Have a tremendous weekend peeps. I imagine I'll see some of you tomorrow night. Recycle, will ya? It's Earf Day tuh-day!
(The ladies in policy accounting crack me up. 7 of them have joined weight watchers and are acting as moral support for each other. They’re always power-walking through our building and counting "points". Also, I think the big-dog bosses daughter who works in re-insurability has been checking me out. This is not my imagination, and has been confirmed like a bigfoot siting.)
About my weekend-
(I’m seeing TDI tonight w/Kwaiser and Talon. Tomorrow is a party at my neighbors…fun to say, "At my neighbors"…Saturday also marks J’s last "Anything Goes" @ the Chan! And I get a much needed private lesson at the Dojo, ‘cause- that’s right, I ain’t working tomorrow afternoon)
About my family-
(They’re nuts. And my big brother is buying a house in Prior LAKE!!!??)
‘Bout J-
(I love that girl. She’s gonna be a Napkin or something in B & B)
‘Bout the cookie I snuck
(J caught me red handed. I swear that cookie was talking to me. Chips a-mothafuckin-HOY!!!!)
Yet, job #2 kicked my ass so hard last night with a ridiculous amount of customers: (40+ and I was the only one working!) That when I left- (Which was considerably later than I’ve ever left) It felt like I had been kicked in the stomach multiple times…and, um, since I’ve been kicked in the stomach multiple times before, I can tell you with SOME authority: Really Sucks. And really hurts too. Have a tremendous weekend peeps. I imagine I'll see some of you tomorrow night. Recycle, will ya? It's Earf Day tuh-day!
Thursday, April 21, 2005
Random Facts, part Deux
But wait…Butt-Waiter…I’m twelve.
I’m a big fan of weird, off the wall comedy.
Kids in the Hall, the State, Monty Python, The Young One’s, The Muppet Show, El Simpsones, Steve Martin…The best stuff ever. And I still happen to think scatological humor is pretty funny. (*) Basically if you watch a funny movie and something is put in it for comical value that makes absolutely no sense…I’ll crack up. (Insert tennis ball falling here.)
I have a damn good memory. (**)
I remember really strange details explicitly. Not just things like Jr. High Locker combinations, more like detail , meetings. I never forget compliments (Cause I get so damn few) and acts of kindness or generosity. Something non-theatre related about the Geef- This dude has been Mo-fo’ing helpful to J and I, even before I really even got to know the guy. (That dance floor was frickin’ heavy dude. It moves so much easier when it is disassembled!) On our first "dinner at my place" date, J called me "beautiful". I’ve been told I’m a cheeseball with compliments, or that I lay it on thick. Whatev. I give some creedence to Karma, but I give more creedence to memory. People remember when you do/say nice things. Things like that kick ass. If you want an example of something you did (not just toward me, something I saw.) you let me know.
I’m fiercely loyal (***)
That shit’ll get me into trouble someday. I’m fairly certain most peeps reading this drivel know what I mean when I say this. I’ll getcher back, etc…"Oh that P, he’s all about loyalty and honor like he thinks he’s some gawdamn ninja. " True to life kids. Blame mom and dad. Big brother is even more dramatic about it than I am. "Hey thanks bro" "What are you talking about? You’re my fucking brother. Jesus!" Yeah. We’re like that. Manner’s and Honor. Here’s to honor- get on her, stay on her. HAR!
I’ve cried during the following movies:
Top Gun, Fox and the Hound, Awakenings, Big Fish, and (Even though technically not a movie) the episode of Punky Brewster where she gets sent back to the orphanage and George’s camera store get’s closed. (I will destroy you if you laugh about that last one. I stopped watching it after I found out Punky grew boobs. Really, that was what the whole damn episode was about. Oh, Soleil, how they did grow…poor thing.)
I hate handguns (****)
I believe in protecting our right to arm bears…As the child of a cop, I grew up w/a patented respect/fear for firearms. I just hate’em.
"Maybe you killed Serrano?"
"The guy who killed Serrano needed a gun…" Brandon Lee still kicks ass. RENT RAPID FIRE!
As much as I like Spider Man...
I get really tired of getting the damn knick-knacks. Stop. I am Spider Man and you’ll just need to accept it. (*****)
I know how much I talk, and how annoying I am.
I’m working on it. I really am. You’d be surprised at how much I’ve toned that shit down.
I hate passive aggressive insults
"That’s so Gay" and "That’s retarded". I just can’t get those retarded phrases out of my gay-ass vocabulary.
I use ghetto vernacular because I grew up in the hood. Yo. (******)
If I win the lottery, I’m buying Pust a truck
Don’t ask. It’s stuck in my craw. Fuck, did I just say "Craw"? "Robster Craw’s? What the fuck are ‘Robster Craws?’ " Damn Funny.
I wore trenchcoats and fedora’s to school.
Not because I was an outcast, but because I loved Dr.Who. I even crammed my pockets full of shit like he did. Remember, I attended Weird Al concerts and loved the Talking Heads.
I went to 6 proms in high school.
I just thought of that since it is prom season and I hate my 2nd job right now.
I don't mind working in a corporate environment.
I know it's not for everyone, and it isn't really my first choice of profession. What I think is that people who go on tirades about corporate America being evil are (IMHO) being a little bit dramatic. And I prefer keeping the drama onstage.
That’s all I got for today.
*Brit-coms were always on before Dr. Who. And I’m convinced that Will Ferrell is the 2nd coming.
** My Dad and the Geef are two other peeps I know of who also have uncanny recall. At his retirement, Daddy-o’s buddies at the Sheriff’s Dept all commented on it. That, I thought was pretty cool. Frickin' Geef remembered the state One-Act competition show my high school did! That is also really cool.
*** About the loyalty thing, It’s caused me to be kinda cheated on a lot. So, loyalty has bred a little stupidity too. My buddy, who I was gonna write off for never calling me? I’ll probably be happy to hear from him anyway. We few, we shallow few, tend to forgive easily too.
****My dad helped implement the Drop yer Guns program in the early 90’s. Remember that one? Helped the gang-bangers trade in their Sat Nite Specials for $. It’s over now, but there is a weird little statue in the front of the Henn Co. Govt. Center as a result
***** Little known fact- I used to wear my Spidey suit under my street clothes when I went to school in 1st and 2nd grade. My teacher had to call my mom and dad to find out why I was taking donations to join my fan club. Dad also used to get calls from our neighbors to "Come get your kid out of my tree. He’s where them damn pajama’s again!"
******Brooklyn to tha Piz-ark. Don’t trip. I was asked to join mad-many gangs since I was so good with num-chucks and stuff. I still need to see that movie.
I still have no love of politics.
I’m a big fan of weird, off the wall comedy.
Kids in the Hall, the State, Monty Python, The Young One’s, The Muppet Show, El Simpsones, Steve Martin…The best stuff ever. And I still happen to think scatological humor is pretty funny. (*) Basically if you watch a funny movie and something is put in it for comical value that makes absolutely no sense…I’ll crack up. (Insert tennis ball falling here.)
I have a damn good memory. (**)
I remember really strange details explicitly. Not just things like Jr. High Locker combinations, more like detail , meetings. I never forget compliments (Cause I get so damn few) and acts of kindness or generosity. Something non-theatre related about the Geef- This dude has been Mo-fo’ing helpful to J and I, even before I really even got to know the guy. (That dance floor was frickin’ heavy dude. It moves so much easier when it is disassembled!) On our first "dinner at my place" date, J called me "beautiful". I’ve been told I’m a cheeseball with compliments, or that I lay it on thick. Whatev. I give some creedence to Karma, but I give more creedence to memory. People remember when you do/say nice things. Things like that kick ass. If you want an example of something you did (not just toward me, something I saw.) you let me know.
I’m fiercely loyal (***)
That shit’ll get me into trouble someday. I’m fairly certain most peeps reading this drivel know what I mean when I say this. I’ll getcher back, etc…"Oh that P, he’s all about loyalty and honor like he thinks he’s some gawdamn ninja. " True to life kids. Blame mom and dad. Big brother is even more dramatic about it than I am. "Hey thanks bro" "What are you talking about? You’re my fucking brother. Jesus!" Yeah. We’re like that. Manner’s and Honor. Here’s to honor- get on her, stay on her. HAR!
I’ve cried during the following movies:
Top Gun, Fox and the Hound, Awakenings, Big Fish, and (Even though technically not a movie) the episode of Punky Brewster where she gets sent back to the orphanage and George’s camera store get’s closed. (I will destroy you if you laugh about that last one. I stopped watching it after I found out Punky grew boobs. Really, that was what the whole damn episode was about. Oh, Soleil, how they did grow…poor thing.)
I hate handguns (****)
I believe in protecting our right to arm bears…As the child of a cop, I grew up w/a patented respect/fear for firearms. I just hate’em.
"Maybe you killed Serrano?"
"The guy who killed Serrano needed a gun…" Brandon Lee still kicks ass. RENT RAPID FIRE!
As much as I like Spider Man...
I get really tired of getting the damn knick-knacks. Stop. I am Spider Man and you’ll just need to accept it. (*****)
I know how much I talk, and how annoying I am.
I’m working on it. I really am. You’d be surprised at how much I’ve toned that shit down.
I hate passive aggressive insults
"That’s so Gay" and "That’s retarded". I just can’t get those retarded phrases out of my gay-ass vocabulary.
I use ghetto vernacular because I grew up in the hood. Yo. (******)
If I win the lottery, I’m buying Pust a truck
Don’t ask. It’s stuck in my craw. Fuck, did I just say "Craw"? "Robster Craw’s? What the fuck are ‘Robster Craws?’ " Damn Funny.
I wore trenchcoats and fedora’s to school.
Not because I was an outcast, but because I loved Dr.Who. I even crammed my pockets full of shit like he did. Remember, I attended Weird Al concerts and loved the Talking Heads.
I went to 6 proms in high school.
I just thought of that since it is prom season and I hate my 2nd job right now.
I don't mind working in a corporate environment.
I know it's not for everyone, and it isn't really my first choice of profession. What I think is that people who go on tirades about corporate America being evil are (IMHO) being a little bit dramatic. And I prefer keeping the drama onstage.
That’s all I got for today.
*Brit-coms were always on before Dr. Who. And I’m convinced that Will Ferrell is the 2nd coming.
** My Dad and the Geef are two other peeps I know of who also have uncanny recall. At his retirement, Daddy-o’s buddies at the Sheriff’s Dept all commented on it. That, I thought was pretty cool. Frickin' Geef remembered the state One-Act competition show my high school did! That is also really cool.
*** About the loyalty thing, It’s caused me to be kinda cheated on a lot. So, loyalty has bred a little stupidity too. My buddy, who I was gonna write off for never calling me? I’ll probably be happy to hear from him anyway. We few, we shallow few, tend to forgive easily too.
****My dad helped implement the Drop yer Guns program in the early 90’s. Remember that one? Helped the gang-bangers trade in their Sat Nite Specials for $. It’s over now, but there is a weird little statue in the front of the Henn Co. Govt. Center as a result
***** Little known fact- I used to wear my Spidey suit under my street clothes when I went to school in 1st and 2nd grade. My teacher had to call my mom and dad to find out why I was taking donations to join my fan club. Dad also used to get calls from our neighbors to "Come get your kid out of my tree. He’s where them damn pajama’s again!"
******Brooklyn to tha Piz-ark. Don’t trip. I was asked to join mad-many gangs since I was so good with num-chucks and stuff. I still need to see that movie.
I still have no love of politics.
I can't be mad...
I had more "Getting to know P-ism’s" listed here. I’ll post them later, but I had to get this out.
1st- I am turning into my dad. He’s the kind of guy who fancies himself a mini-Bob Vila, y’know the type? He has all these dang tools, figures he can (and to his credit, usually does.) repair and/or fix everything within 5 minutes. Every job, in his mind, takes 5 minutes. Whether it’s mowing our huge ass backyard, painting the ceiling, or changing the oil. Yup, Darren McGavin in A Christmas Story, is my old man. Within recent years he has started to admit that (gasp!) not all jobs take merely 5 minutes, going even further by stating some of his limitations even. Whoa…what happened to my dad? What did you DO to him Mr. Space Aliens?
The problem with him being Speedy McSpeederson when he does fixits/etc. sometimes (usually) he breaks what he is fixing, followed by a tirade of profanity that would make a merchant marine blush. This was evident during my recent drywalling debacle. (Many superfluous holes were accidentally punched due to rushing the job. As Marge Simpson said: Slow and Steady, wins the race.)
Well LAST night I decided to take on a relatively easy task of removing the nasty decorative border in our nook. With 8 ft ceilings I had placed one foot on the ladder and the other foot on the worktable. In my mind, I knew from the start that it was a bad idea, and I had an image of J looking at me in a chastening fashion. So, when the table collapsed, nay, broke in half and I went splaying face down on top. (Think "pro-wrestler" getting tossed out of the ring and onto a table.) I actually took it in stride and figured I should probably call it a night, but Noooo…I kept working, and decided to switch my talents toward the upstairs and get the window that wouldn’t open fixed quick. (The paint glued it down, see?) So, taking the putty knife and slicing carefully around the window, I grip the handle and shake it a little to start it open. The wood moved, the glass broke, and I said the "F" word so loud that I’m sure Fred N’ Sal heard me all the way down the street. Sighs…. I am my dad. And my fingers hurt.
Portana…I know you’ve been struggling girl. I know. I feel ya. But lemme tell you…A fuck it, lemme not. A tip folks: Buy land and have someone build, is all I’m sayin’. Or rent. I'm pissed.
1st- I am turning into my dad. He’s the kind of guy who fancies himself a mini-Bob Vila, y’know the type? He has all these dang tools, figures he can (and to his credit, usually does.) repair and/or fix everything within 5 minutes. Every job, in his mind, takes 5 minutes. Whether it’s mowing our huge ass backyard, painting the ceiling, or changing the oil. Yup, Darren McGavin in A Christmas Story, is my old man. Within recent years he has started to admit that (gasp!) not all jobs take merely 5 minutes, going even further by stating some of his limitations even. Whoa…what happened to my dad? What did you DO to him Mr. Space Aliens?
The problem with him being Speedy McSpeederson when he does fixits/etc. sometimes (usually) he breaks what he is fixing, followed by a tirade of profanity that would make a merchant marine blush. This was evident during my recent drywalling debacle. (Many superfluous holes were accidentally punched due to rushing the job. As Marge Simpson said: Slow and Steady, wins the race.)
Well LAST night I decided to take on a relatively easy task of removing the nasty decorative border in our nook. With 8 ft ceilings I had placed one foot on the ladder and the other foot on the worktable. In my mind, I knew from the start that it was a bad idea, and I had an image of J looking at me in a chastening fashion. So, when the table collapsed, nay, broke in half and I went splaying face down on top. (Think "pro-wrestler" getting tossed out of the ring and onto a table.) I actually took it in stride and figured I should probably call it a night, but Noooo…I kept working, and decided to switch my talents toward the upstairs and get the window that wouldn’t open fixed quick. (The paint glued it down, see?) So, taking the putty knife and slicing carefully around the window, I grip the handle and shake it a little to start it open. The wood moved, the glass broke, and I said the "F" word so loud that I’m sure Fred N’ Sal heard me all the way down the street. Sighs…. I am my dad. And my fingers hurt.
Portana…I know you’ve been struggling girl. I know. I feel ya. But lemme tell you…A fuck it, lemme not. A tip folks: Buy land and have someone build, is all I’m sayin’. Or rent. I'm pissed.
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
Some Random things you should know of the P.
In case you had needed a better understanding.
I listen to MPR to calm me down.
I get really pissed off at other drivers when I’m in the car by myself. This is partly due to my 1st driving instructor being a cop (Dad), where we incorporated some very unusual techniques in my driving. ("Don’t ever drive like me" was his motto. Whoops) Needless to say I get very frustrated at people who drive poorly for the plethora of reasons that they drive poorly. So BAM! On goes "Morning Edition" or "Garrison Keillor" and my clenched jaw relaxes. My love J uses "smooth jazz" to calm herself down…me, I just like the background chatter. AND, I can pretend to be mildly informed of current events.
I don’t care for TV or Concerts.
Seriously. I hate all reality TV with an unbridled passion. I just don't understand how people can take a night and label it "Amazing Race" night. And even though J has an "Idol" fetish, which I admit to following early on in our relationship, I’ve now dropped the habit entirely. J tells me that she watches TV because she likes the background noise to unwind to after a busy day of being creative/rehearsing. Me? It’s only that. Noise. And after a long day, I love blessed silence. My disclaimer is that I just watched an episode of "The Shield" and "House" and I am really digging the acting on the shows…BUT I just can’t get into TV anymore. Except the Simpsons and X-Files early season re-runs. I like movies. DVD’s. And plays. But I don’t get to see enough of those either.
And I’m really sorry Kaiser and Portana, but TV sports do nothing for me. I used to watch a little of the Extreme Fights and boxing on pay per view, but I then I got kinda bored. I like watching Viking games at Tracy's and Superbowl Sunday on TV and that’s where it ends. * As for concerts, I’ve been to about 5 concerts in my life **, and every time tix were free. Don’t get me wrong, I love music (Food of Gods and all) and I like seeing live jazz, but that’s about it about that.
Even though I’m a geek, I don’t care for vids.
Booooring. I’ve graduated from Pong, to Atari (We couldn't afford Collecovision or Intellivision) , to Apple 2E (Oregon Trail anyone?), to NES, to Playstation…and then I stopped. Now, I used to like fighting games, and Jedi games. (The only games I owned were Tenshu, Tekken 3, Marvel Vs. Capcom, Spider Man, and Jedi Power Battles) but then PS2 rolled out and I realized by the time I had any $ to afford it, the next model would be released. So I quit. Now, I grew up on RPG’s, and even though the new PC games can help you relive those days online…I’d rather read a book. Nowadays, you just won't see me playing sports games. Yuck (Another big reason I don't like vids was that there was the time my buddy had me over to play vids and I sat and watched him play for half an hour before I decided to leave. This guy clocked 70 hours one week on a video game. Yeah. *** Don't get me started on things that strike me as a waste of time. )
I love bar trivia.
NTN, live trivia…it rules. ****And I like darts and bowling and pool, it’s just I’m not all that competitive with recreational activities so I don’t like playing with people who take it so frickin’ seriously. (It's hard for me to have a good time) Just like Golfing etc. I just don’t have the patience or the inclination to play. And don’t get me started about playing cards. Yeeech. I’m not a Friday night Poker nighter kinda guy. I get bored playing Uno. UNO!!!!
I have no love of politics.
Sorry, I know they love me. I read the news and do my best to keep informed, but I prefer to keep my opinions to myself. If I had the time I’d definitely be more proactive and involved, but that is scheduling for you. I can’t involve myself in them, so I don’t feel comfortable bitching/arguing/discussing them. I really believe in deeds, not words…y’know? And my issues tend to lean toward the domestic, but that’s all you’ll get to know. ***** Same thing goes for religion. For those of you who attend city council meetings, write letters, and work hard to get your dude elected…I commend you. (I’ve done it before, and I know that shit can be exhausting.)
Disclaimers
* I love going to live sporting events. Especially Saints Games. Live sports are about the only time you’ll see me narf down a hot dog, and chug a beer. Both, prerequisites of enjoying any sporting events. And Wild Hockey Games kick all sorts of ass. (Greedy bastards)
** My concerts, in order: Weird Al Yankovic (1984) , Beach Boys (1991), 1991 Special Olympics Mega-Concert w/Prince and others, Trip Shakespeare (1992), Sarah McLaughlin (1997), and most recently (ugh) Celene Dion (2004). I think I would still like to see Prince, Billy Joel, Bruce Springsteen, and a U2 concert…But still, only if they were free.
*** I love going to Arcades ala’ Gameworks. Those are pretty fun. And even though KOTOR, KOTOR II, Jedi Academy, and the new Spidey game were fun, I only got to play them for 5 minutes before he took over. Recently, at that Best Buy overnight shoot I tried my hand at a couple of sport games in the store. Got bored. Went back to my book.
**** There’s a reason, or rather a woman, I dated which took me off of the Bar Trivia thing. No Kaiser, you don’t know this one. I can tell you the story someday, ‘cause it is damn funny…one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen my big brother do. I also was (almost) in a fight w/ a dude at Bar Trivia when he started swearing and slamming his board after he was bumped out of 1st place ('Cause of yours truly). I told him he was still kickin' ass and to calm down. He then started screaming at me. So I had the owner escort him out. Over trivia. Get a life dude.
***** A few causes I believe in: Medical research: Cancer (Breast Cancer), Aids Research and Awareness, Community Outreach, and k-12 Education are huge to me. Especially EDUCATION! Children learn what they live, y’know? We’ve gone from being a society of optimism and opportunity to one of fear, expectation, and immediate gratification. I want, I need, I deserve. Fuck that. Get real, Get a job, and get with the program. Parents need to let their kids eat dirt, get hurt, and read a book. And start getting school programs on the same page...all schools.
I listen to MPR to calm me down.
I get really pissed off at other drivers when I’m in the car by myself. This is partly due to my 1st driving instructor being a cop (Dad), where we incorporated some very unusual techniques in my driving. ("Don’t ever drive like me" was his motto. Whoops) Needless to say I get very frustrated at people who drive poorly for the plethora of reasons that they drive poorly. So BAM! On goes "Morning Edition" or "Garrison Keillor" and my clenched jaw relaxes. My love J uses "smooth jazz" to calm herself down…me, I just like the background chatter. AND, I can pretend to be mildly informed of current events.
I don’t care for TV or Concerts.
Seriously. I hate all reality TV with an unbridled passion. I just don't understand how people can take a night and label it "Amazing Race" night. And even though J has an "Idol" fetish, which I admit to following early on in our relationship, I’ve now dropped the habit entirely. J tells me that she watches TV because she likes the background noise to unwind to after a busy day of being creative/rehearsing. Me? It’s only that. Noise. And after a long day, I love blessed silence. My disclaimer is that I just watched an episode of "The Shield" and "House" and I am really digging the acting on the shows…BUT I just can’t get into TV anymore. Except the Simpsons and X-Files early season re-runs. I like movies. DVD’s. And plays. But I don’t get to see enough of those either.
And I’m really sorry Kaiser and Portana, but TV sports do nothing for me. I used to watch a little of the Extreme Fights and boxing on pay per view, but I then I got kinda bored. I like watching Viking games at Tracy's and Superbowl Sunday on TV and that’s where it ends. * As for concerts, I’ve been to about 5 concerts in my life **, and every time tix were free. Don’t get me wrong, I love music (Food of Gods and all) and I like seeing live jazz, but that’s about it about that.
Even though I’m a geek, I don’t care for vids.
Booooring. I’ve graduated from Pong, to Atari (We couldn't afford Collecovision or Intellivision) , to Apple 2E (Oregon Trail anyone?), to NES, to Playstation…and then I stopped. Now, I used to like fighting games, and Jedi games. (The only games I owned were Tenshu, Tekken 3, Marvel Vs. Capcom, Spider Man, and Jedi Power Battles) but then PS2 rolled out and I realized by the time I had any $ to afford it, the next model would be released. So I quit. Now, I grew up on RPG’s, and even though the new PC games can help you relive those days online…I’d rather read a book. Nowadays, you just won't see me playing sports games. Yuck (Another big reason I don't like vids was that there was the time my buddy had me over to play vids and I sat and watched him play for half an hour before I decided to leave. This guy clocked 70 hours one week on a video game. Yeah. *** Don't get me started on things that strike me as a waste of time. )
I love bar trivia.
NTN, live trivia…it rules. ****And I like darts and bowling and pool, it’s just I’m not all that competitive with recreational activities so I don’t like playing with people who take it so frickin’ seriously. (It's hard for me to have a good time) Just like Golfing etc. I just don’t have the patience or the inclination to play. And don’t get me started about playing cards. Yeeech. I’m not a Friday night Poker nighter kinda guy. I get bored playing Uno. UNO!!!!
I have no love of politics.
Sorry, I know they love me. I read the news and do my best to keep informed, but I prefer to keep my opinions to myself. If I had the time I’d definitely be more proactive and involved, but that is scheduling for you. I can’t involve myself in them, so I don’t feel comfortable bitching/arguing/discussing them. I really believe in deeds, not words…y’know? And my issues tend to lean toward the domestic, but that’s all you’ll get to know. ***** Same thing goes for religion. For those of you who attend city council meetings, write letters, and work hard to get your dude elected…I commend you. (I’ve done it before, and I know that shit can be exhausting.)
Disclaimers
* I love going to live sporting events. Especially Saints Games. Live sports are about the only time you’ll see me narf down a hot dog, and chug a beer. Both, prerequisites of enjoying any sporting events. And Wild Hockey Games kick all sorts of ass. (Greedy bastards)
** My concerts, in order: Weird Al Yankovic (1984) , Beach Boys (1991), 1991 Special Olympics Mega-Concert w/Prince and others, Trip Shakespeare (1992), Sarah McLaughlin (1997), and most recently (ugh) Celene Dion (2004). I think I would still like to see Prince, Billy Joel, Bruce Springsteen, and a U2 concert…But still, only if they were free.
*** I love going to Arcades ala’ Gameworks. Those are pretty fun. And even though KOTOR, KOTOR II, Jedi Academy, and the new Spidey game were fun, I only got to play them for 5 minutes before he took over. Recently, at that Best Buy overnight shoot I tried my hand at a couple of sport games in the store. Got bored. Went back to my book.
**** There’s a reason, or rather a woman, I dated which took me off of the Bar Trivia thing. No Kaiser, you don’t know this one. I can tell you the story someday, ‘cause it is damn funny…one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen my big brother do. I also was (almost) in a fight w/ a dude at Bar Trivia when he started swearing and slamming his board after he was bumped out of 1st place ('Cause of yours truly). I told him he was still kickin' ass and to calm down. He then started screaming at me. So I had the owner escort him out. Over trivia. Get a life dude.
***** A few causes I believe in: Medical research: Cancer (Breast Cancer), Aids Research and Awareness, Community Outreach, and k-12 Education are huge to me. Especially EDUCATION! Children learn what they live, y’know? We’ve gone from being a society of optimism and opportunity to one of fear, expectation, and immediate gratification. I want, I need, I deserve. Fuck that. Get real, Get a job, and get with the program. Parents need to let their kids eat dirt, get hurt, and read a book. And start getting school programs on the same page...all schools.
Monday, April 18, 2005
Interview Questions
I'm bored, and since my last post was kinda bitchy...Compliments of a Blog I found which turned out to be an old classmate of mine at PCHS
1. Who was your first kiss (like make out kiss)? Tracey H. She had braces. We "went out" in grade 9 for 2 weks and had a very slovenly 1st kiss during the "Spring Fling" dance. It was an incredible turn-on and set me on a course of self-destruction for many years: The desire to open mouth kiss a plethora of women before I die. Thank Goodness for mega-hot fiancee's...and the fact that kissing on the mouth is a sign of affection and not always boner-inducing.
2. What did you wear for senior pictures? Heh. Ewwww. Everybodies fave was "The lean" -i.e. Me leaning against a door frame in a black bomber jacket, tight white t-shirt and jeans. The yearbook photo was a charcoal gray suit and maroon tie. And then a bunch with me in my foo-ball jersey. Whatever...I had a mullet which ruined them all.
3. What are your dreams? Just kidding. Describe your first time being drunk. Prom, my sophomore year. My gf/date was making out with a dude at the after party so that we would break up. Gettin' drunk seemed like a pretty good idea at the time.
A "memorable" drunk experience will be posted later . It involves a cabin, booze, and mistaking the cabin linen-closet for the loo. I wasn't invited back the party next year.
4. Where did you and J have your first date? Explain. I've bored you with the 1st night we met and how frustrating it was. After I was newly single, I waited a couple of weeks and figured that I just had to find out if she was the one. So I call her up, fully expecting her not to want to go out with me. After a week or so of phone tag and our schedules not meshing, (And an audition for "Few Good Men". I remember that for some reason.) her 1st words to me were "I do NOT want to be the other woman!"
Anyway, we went to Rudolphs for Happy Hour, talking until almost bar close and my all new old cheap moves must've worked, 'cause she went back to my placet. My good friend ssssSteve came over the next day, and after sitting down on the couch said "Why is there glitter all over?" / I say- "J was wearing a shirt with all this glitter on it."/"Huh. That didn't stay on long, did it?" He's an ass.
5. How many licks to the center of a pink Tootsie Pop? Euphemistic, huh?
Copy and paste these interview questions to your own sites, if'n you'd like.
1. Who was your first kiss (like make out kiss)? Tracey H. She had braces. We "went out" in grade 9 for 2 weks and had a very slovenly 1st kiss during the "Spring Fling" dance. It was an incredible turn-on and set me on a course of self-destruction for many years: The desire to open mouth kiss a plethora of women before I die. Thank Goodness for mega-hot fiancee's...and the fact that kissing on the mouth is a sign of affection and not always boner-inducing.
2. What did you wear for senior pictures? Heh. Ewwww. Everybodies fave was "The lean" -i.e. Me leaning against a door frame in a black bomber jacket, tight white t-shirt and jeans. The yearbook photo was a charcoal gray suit and maroon tie. And then a bunch with me in my foo-ball jersey. Whatever...I had a mullet which ruined them all.
3. What are your dreams? Just kidding. Describe your first time being drunk. Prom, my sophomore year. My gf/date was making out with a dude at the after party so that we would break up. Gettin' drunk seemed like a pretty good idea at the time.
A "memorable" drunk experience will be posted later . It involves a cabin, booze, and mistaking the cabin linen-closet for the loo. I wasn't invited back the party next year.
4. Where did you and J have your first date? Explain. I've bored you with the 1st night we met and how frustrating it was. After I was newly single, I waited a couple of weeks and figured that I just had to find out if she was the one. So I call her up, fully expecting her not to want to go out with me. After a week or so of phone tag and our schedules not meshing, (And an audition for "Few Good Men". I remember that for some reason.) her 1st words to me were "I do NOT want to be the other woman!"
Anyway, we went to Rudolphs for Happy Hour, talking until almost bar close and my all new old cheap moves must've worked, 'cause she went back to my placet. My good friend ssssSteve came over the next day, and after sitting down on the couch said "Why is there glitter all over?" / I say- "J was wearing a shirt with all this glitter on it."/"Huh. That didn't stay on long, did it?" He's an ass.
5. How many licks to the center of a pink Tootsie Pop? Euphemistic, huh?
Copy and paste these interview questions to your own sites, if'n you'd like.
I am the mighty THOR!!!
And what t a mighty-mighty weekend. Didn't see ANY damn thee-Aytre (my original goal). If you folks new how tough it was for me to actually get the motivation to put my ass out in a theatre seat you may sympathize. Or maybe you wouldn't. Friday I had a date with priming the kitchen. My first coat all but sucked, so I had to do touch ups. (And, do them again Saturday morning because I couldn't see what the eff I was doing. Daylight is much better for painting.) The costume shop was a terror due to the people that didn't leave... Yes, they showed up at 5 minutes to close and yes, they kept us at the store a full hour after we locked up. I did precious little to hide my crabbiness, so I made sure they got a full dose of Haughty Butler from me. Prick sprinkles.
Later I napped, then headed on over to Kaiser's Palacio De Gato . (Palace of Cat ) He has this cat that's cute as hell, but almost 5,000 years old. It is Methuseleh. I imbibed WAY too much, which meant I did the P thing and talked way the eff too much. I am a conversation hog. Nice...dinglefritz. Can't even go out for a drink w/o being selfish. Kaiser, let's actually play darts next time. It keeps me focused and will help me STFU.
Sunday, It was a day of outdoor mega-manual labor where I pick-axed the hell outta some tough roots and took my mighty hammer, Mjolner, to the shitty looking retaining planter in our back yard. (It's great to do manual labor pretending to be a character from Norse mythology. What's also nice is that you sweat off the previous nights naughtiness ) I destroyed it like it 'twere nothing. The hammer and pickaxe I mean. I had to pony up $50 to replace them for my big brother. And today? I'm so fricking Thor I can hardly move my damn fingers. (Seriously, I couldn't even open those stupid baby carrot snack packs I usually bring for lunch. I am pain.)
Later I napped, then headed on over to Kaiser's Palacio De Gato . (Palace of Cat ) He has this cat that's cute as hell, but almost 5,000 years old. It is Methuseleh. I imbibed WAY too much, which meant I did the P thing and talked way the eff too much. I am a conversation hog. Nice...dinglefritz. Can't even go out for a drink w/o being selfish. Kaiser, let's actually play darts next time. It keeps me focused and will help me STFU.
Sunday, It was a day of outdoor mega-manual labor where I pick-axed the hell outta some tough roots and took my mighty hammer, Mjolner, to the shitty looking retaining planter in our back yard. (It's great to do manual labor pretending to be a character from Norse mythology. What's also nice is that you sweat off the previous nights naughtiness ) I destroyed it like it 'twere nothing. The hammer and pickaxe I mean. I had to pony up $50 to replace them for my big brother. And today? I'm so fricking Thor I can hardly move my damn fingers. (Seriously, I couldn't even open those stupid baby carrot snack packs I usually bring for lunch. I am pain.)
Friday, April 15, 2005
I apologize for yesterdays "blue" post
I am sorry. I know that most people who read this don’t care for the details of my sex life, no matter how innocent or superficial. I am fairly private regarding my privates, scuse me, I mean my private life, and even though sometimes my waxings may come across as non-sensical I’m sure folks (cough-cough…Jabas) don’t want to hear P’s stories of: Pounding the pud, slamming ham, manhandling jubblies, parting the beef curtain, hairy axe wounds, thrusting the purple headed warrior into a quivering mound of love pudding, threesomes, twosomes, romantic interludes with lonely lesbians, or even doing position # 17- The spreadeagle. Less still, do folks want to follow what I’m sure would come across as a poor mans Harlequin Romance. As my dad always coached: "A gentlemen never tells…"
And besides, as I am so boorish I’m quite sure it’ll be in one ear and out the rubber.
Damn, P. All that set up for one lousy joke. I wonder if this'll get Jabas reading my post again. Or at the very least, update his durn blog! Ah CHA CHA CHA!!! Happy Friday y’all
And besides, as I am so boorish I’m quite sure it’ll be in one ear and out the rubber.
Damn, P. All that set up for one lousy joke. I wonder if this'll get Jabas reading my post again. Or at the very least, update his durn blog! Ah CHA CHA CHA!!! Happy Friday y’all
Thursday, April 14, 2005
They go so fast. (This cracks me up)
I’m 12 years old. I swear to God.
Let’s see, not to put to fine a point on it… I ran out of condoms on Sunday. There, I said it, and I don’t feel all that good about it. Yes, I know there are other fun things couples can do besides "that", which technically don’t require said prophylactics…however the very threat of not having them means one thing.
P needs to buy some more. Begin the Rubber Rant.
When I was single or in previous relations I had them around and they seemed to last forever. Oh sure, I’d burn through them early on in my old relationships, and then wind up left with an almost full box by the time we’d broken up. (Nothing sadder than a dusty box of rubbers in your nightstand. They taunt you, y’know. "Hey P? ‘Member us guys? We used to hang out…now what’s up? There’s corn growing in the box from all the dust…poor Jimmie here has got asthma…Let’s get together again soon, huh?") I’m weird, and my condoms talk to me.
And y’know when I was single and "Gods Gift to Wimmin" they lasted a while too. (Sorry, I had to Kaiser…Really, I can’t say I was "God’s gift". It was more like there were, on occasion, some ladies who took pity on my "all-new old cheap moves", and God had pity. Well, that and I’ve been involved in relationships for much longer periods than I’ve ever been single. And single ugly dudes just don’t get as much play as you tall thin Abercrombie Boys. A sexual Job I was.)
So…I’m at Le Bullseye yestiddy and I figured I couldn’t buy the condoms and leave. So, I grab "The Princess Bride" and a Diet Mountain Dew to pad my basket, and head over to the express aisle where a nice motherly looking plump Hispanic woman named, I don’t know, Emphysema, waited to help me. Blip, goes the movie. Blip, goes the soda. (Slow motion now) Bloooooooop…She must of rubbed the box over the scanner 3 or 4 times (Of course.) and then looks at me with a smile. We say nothing more. I pay and leave.
She did better than I would have. "Caffeine beverage huh? Yer gonna wanna stay awake tonight! Oh, ‘the Princess Bride’ too? Great film. That ‘Twue Wove’ dude gets me so horny." Really, I know I shouldn’t feel self-conscious, and I also know that gals need to buy a lot of things deemed "embarrassing". I just turn into a jr. high schooler when I’m purchasing prophylactics.
Whatever. I got the mega-mega-pack. That should last me a while. And they’re "Extra sensitive", so that means they cry during sad movies.
Let’s see, not to put to fine a point on it…
P needs to buy some more. Begin the Rubber Rant.
When I was single or in previous relations I had them around and they seemed to last forever. Oh sure, I’d burn through them early on in my old relationships, and then wind up left with an almost full box by the time we’d broken up. (Nothing sadder than a dusty box of rubbers in your nightstand. They taunt you, y’know. "Hey P? ‘Member us guys? We used to hang out…now what’s up? There’s corn growing in the box from all the dust…poor Jimmie here has got asthma…Let’s get together again soon, huh?") I’m weird, and my condoms talk to me.
And y’know when I was single and "Gods Gift to Wimmin" they lasted a while too. (Sorry, I had to Kaiser…Really, I can’t say I was "God’s gift". It was more like there were, on occasion, some ladies who took pity on my "all-new old cheap moves", and God had pity. Well, that and I’ve been involved in relationships for much longer periods than I’ve ever been single. And single ugly dudes just don’t get as much play as you tall thin Abercrombie Boys. A sexual Job I was.)
So…I’m at Le Bullseye yestiddy and I figured I couldn’t buy the condoms and leave. So, I grab "The Princess Bride" and a Diet Mountain Dew to pad my basket, and head over to the express aisle where a nice motherly looking plump Hispanic woman named, I don’t know, Emphysema, waited to help me. Blip, goes the movie. Blip, goes the soda. (Slow motion now) Bloooooooop…She must of rubbed the box over the scanner 3 or 4 times (Of course.) and then looks at me with a smile. We say nothing more. I pay and leave.
She did better than I would have. "Caffeine beverage huh? Yer gonna wanna stay awake tonight! Oh, ‘the Princess Bride’ too? Great film. That ‘Twue Wove’ dude gets me so horny." Really, I know I shouldn’t feel self-conscious, and I also know that gals need to buy a lot of things deemed "embarrassing". I just turn into a jr. high schooler when I’m purchasing prophylactics.
Whatever. I got the mega-mega-pack. That should last me a while. And they’re "Extra sensitive", so that means they cry during sad movies.
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Told ya so!
J's now on the balanced protein kick. I was telling about why I made so many chicky boobs was to have an easy/healthy lunch during the week. I told her all about the vascularity improving and the chub burning aspects. So what do I find in the fridge? Pre-made tuna for her lunch.
We have little tiffs about each other's diets and ways we go about trying to stay in shape. This would be the 1st time actual food played into it where she took my advice. Gotcha! She's cutting out dairy and simple starches for 2 weeks to see if she feels/notice's anything...he he he...
(And don't worry ladies. She takes an multi-vit with Iron and a calcium supplement...'cause it's what the ladies need!)
Frankenstein came into the costume shop to get a prom tux. (His mom was tall too.) Serious, this dude had a "9" Sleeve (Super knuckle dragger length, for the lay-person). I wanted to wave a lighter at him to see if he would say "Fire BAD!"
We have little tiffs about each other's diets and ways we go about trying to stay in shape. This would be the 1st time actual food played into it where she took my advice. Gotcha! She's cutting out dairy and simple starches for 2 weeks to see if she feels/notice's anything...he he he...
(And don't worry ladies. She takes an multi-vit with Iron and a calcium supplement...'cause it's what the ladies need!)
Frankenstein came into the costume shop to get a prom tux. (His mom was tall too.) Serious, this dude had a "9" Sleeve (Super knuckle dragger length, for the lay-person). I wanted to wave a lighter at him to see if he would say "Fire BAD!"
Tuesday, April 12, 2005
Now that was a good night.
1st, let me start by saying that not all talks couples engage in are bad, or even gross out lovey dovey. (I’ll admit to having engaged in both.) Sometimes when you have a talk, the outcome can cause you to look at the person with awe and amazement…And sometimes it’ll get your blood pumping too. ‘Nuff Said.
I’m loving my Monday’s w/J. Last night we went through the kitch and started our detailing primer work (Of which, I’ll need to finish priming the Ceiling and walls.) We timed it out so that we worked for 1 solid hour, and then took a quick shower so that we could watch a flick. We opted for "Sahara" if only so that we could (A) See her former class mate Steve Zahn say his funny-funnies, and (B) Take a Clive Owen Break. (Sin City was our 1st choice, but that woulda been too much Clive Owen for one week.)
It was an okay movie, (Worth at least a rental) but it lacked a cohesive sense of closure. (In other words, it wasn’t deliberately left the way it was to pave way for a sequel or to seem mysterious. Just enough Deus Ex Machina to finish the film…blame it on the studios.) Personally, I think J wanted to see the McConnaughey’s semi-nude bod…but I digress. And what is the fuss over Pee-Nee-Lope Cruz? There was nary a lick of chemistry betwixt the two leads…at least I didn’t see it, nor did J. More chemistry between Zahn and McConn.
Anyway…got home too late to bowl. Sorry lovers. Can't we all bowl on a "non" school night?
I’m loving my Monday’s w/J. Last night we went through the kitch and started our detailing primer work (Of which, I’ll need to finish priming the Ceiling and walls.) We timed it out so that we worked for 1 solid hour, and then took a quick shower so that we could watch a flick. We opted for "Sahara" if only so that we could (A) See her former class mate Steve Zahn say his funny-funnies, and (B) Take a Clive Owen Break. (Sin City was our 1st choice, but that woulda been too much Clive Owen for one week.)
It was an okay movie, (Worth at least a rental) but it lacked a cohesive sense of closure. (In other words, it wasn’t deliberately left the way it was to pave way for a sequel or to seem mysterious. Just enough Deus Ex Machina to finish the film…blame it on the studios.) Personally, I think J wanted to see the McConnaughey’s semi-nude bod…but I digress. And what is the fuss over Pee-Nee-Lope Cruz? There was nary a lick of chemistry betwixt the two leads…at least I didn’t see it, nor did J. More chemistry between Zahn and McConn.
Anyway…got home too late to bowl. Sorry lovers. Can't we all bowl on a "non" school night?
Monday, April 11, 2005
Protein weirdness
I’ve got a new eating habit I’m starting, proving once again my penchant for being food obsessive.
(Seriously- You want crazy nibs, you’ve come to the right blog.)
I’m back on the bodybuilder diet, and I’ve begun reducing the number of superfluous carbs and trying to increase my protein intake. I’m not "anti-carb" (blasphemy) or even (shudder) digging on Atkins. I just happen to know that recommended amount of pure protein that can help stimulate anabolic muscle growth, is that so wrong? I’m still eating the carbies (Pasta, Wheat Bread) I’ve just 86’ed bagels, Baked Tostito’s , low fat popcorn and other low fat snacks. Y'know? Simple Starches which don't do dick for energy or to promote the Krebs cycle.
And I’m cooking shiteloads of Chicken Breast. Seriously- I bake 10 Chicky Boobs on a Sunday to have during the week. (And to cut up to throw in pasta dishes, Faheeta’s, etc..) I’m jonesing to break out the dang grill (While I enjoy the speed fat burning capabilities of Mr. Foremans Opus, I think he tends to leave the meat a little dry. Now that was a Euphemism if I ever said one.) Beans, Soy, Tofu, Water Tuna...You name it. My recovery has been much better and I’ve actually felt a little more energetic lately, even coming back from a run. Balancing the protein pasta in my diet has improved my vascularity ( read: Arm Veins) and kept my jeans from being Eddie Bauer Tight. All this cooking and planning, just to have a McConnaugh-esqe tummy. You are lame, P.
Why this new tirade? My mom and J’s mom told me I looked "thin" last Friday, and J asked me that night if I had been eating at work. Yeah, I eat tissue paper and water… Have you SEEN my double chin, honey? That’s where I hide the extra sammich.
I had a film audition last Saturday…I didn’t get it. Duh. Food Obsessors don’t get cast. They hit up Chinese buffets…And there’s a good one by my new place.
(Seriously- You want crazy nibs, you’ve come to the right blog.)
I’m back on the bodybuilder diet, and I’ve begun reducing the number of superfluous carbs and trying to increase my protein intake. I’m not "anti-carb" (blasphemy) or even (shudder) digging on Atkins. I just happen to know that recommended amount of pure protein that can help stimulate anabolic muscle growth, is that so wrong? I’m still eating the carbies (Pasta, Wheat Bread) I’ve just 86’ed bagels, Baked Tostito’s , low fat popcorn and other low fat snacks. Y'know? Simple Starches which don't do dick for energy or to promote the Krebs cycle.
And I’m cooking shiteloads of Chicken Breast. Seriously- I bake 10 Chicky Boobs on a Sunday to have during the week. (And to cut up to throw in pasta dishes, Faheeta’s, etc..) I’m jonesing to break out the dang grill (While I enjoy the speed fat burning capabilities of Mr. Foremans Opus, I think he tends to leave the meat a little dry. Now that was a Euphemism if I ever said one.) Beans, Soy, Tofu, Water Tuna...You name it. My recovery has been much better and I’ve actually felt a little more energetic lately, even coming back from a run. Balancing the protein pasta in my diet has improved my vascularity ( read: Arm Veins) and kept my jeans from being Eddie Bauer Tight. All this cooking and planning, just to have a McConnaugh-esqe tummy. You are lame, P.
Why this new tirade? My mom and J’s mom told me I looked "thin" last Friday, and J asked me that night if I had been eating at work. Yeah, I eat tissue paper and water… Have you SEEN my double chin, honey? That’s where I hide the extra sammich.
I had a film audition last Saturday…I didn’t get it. Duh. Food Obsessors don’t get cast. They hit up Chinese buffets…And there’s a good one by my new place.
I plumbed...
That’s right folks, J’s dad and I ran the pipes up from the basement to where the kitchen sink will (eventually) live- meaning we are one step closer to civilized living. And even though it took the better part of the day and my basement floor looks like a T-1000 exploded all over (Terminator geeks out there? Anyone? It’s from all the solder splatter, get it?) Today’s observation is that profanity is mandatory when doing home repairs. I would like to say that it isn’t true, but you may have never cut out a galvanized pipe that is painfully installed BEHIND the new furnace. WTF were the previous owners thinking. Fucking pipe…SEE? I did it again! Shit.
In true geek fashion, I asked future Dad-in-law how much it would be to purchase my own solder and torch.
J’s Dad: "Ehhh, probably $20-$25 for the whole show. Do you think you’ll be doing some more plumbing?"
Me: "Maybe. I was also thinking about making a lightsaber for a friend of mine and I think that it would help"
They’re so happy to be getting me as a son.
In true geek fashion, I asked future Dad-in-law how much it would be to purchase my own solder and torch.
J’s Dad: "Ehhh, probably $20-$25 for the whole show. Do you think you’ll be doing some more plumbing?"
Me: "Maybe. I was also thinking about making a lightsaber for a friend of mine and I think that it would help"
They’re so happy to be getting me as a son.
Friday, April 08, 2005
Much...Much to do.
Gotta see some shows, man! Take me Out, MoV, some shite at the 4th street (I have a feeling that the theatre can fold space and time so that 6-7 shows can go up- all at once. It's a mystery.) I'm probably gonna miss Ass You Lick It, to which I'm bummed. One of my first post-HS forays into "big kid" theatre. I did it as a lark to get away from a cheating girlfriend (My yearbook photo was my headshot for Chrissakes) but...I got in as an "extra" (Nowadays they are called "essentials"...blargh. It doesn't change the fact that in your contract you're considered "scenery with legs" and only get paid $100.)
Still...
I had a terrific time, working with those Guthrie peeps, and after hearing Charlie Janasz give the "All the world's a stage" speech 40 + times...I really started to dig Mr. Shakes.
Ahhhh nostalgia. If I wasn't such an ego-centric 19 yr old I would have probably glommed more from the experience, but that shallowness kept me from probably being more annoying ( The other "Extra's"-who had just finished their theatre degree's were chomping at the bit to have some face time with Garland Wright.) I was just interested if I could keep drinking at the Dram and not get carded. And if the pretty little gal playing Phebe wanted to kiss me. She sure seemed like she did.
Still...
I had a terrific time, working with those Guthrie peeps, and after hearing Charlie Janasz give the "All the world's a stage" speech 40 + times...I really started to dig Mr. Shakes.
Ahhhh nostalgia. If I wasn't such an ego-centric 19 yr old I would have probably glommed more from the experience, but that shallowness kept me from probably being more annoying ( The other "Extra's"-who had just finished their theatre degree's were chomping at the bit to have some face time with Garland Wright.) I was just interested if I could keep drinking at the Dram and not get carded. And if the pretty little gal playing Phebe wanted to kiss me. She sure seemed like she did.
One smile can brighten your day...
Especially if the smiler looks like Jennifer Connelly. Hooo.
I went to hold the door open for her at the coffee shop and she gave me the dazzlers. She might've said thank you...?
Manners count, boys and girls.
I went to hold the door open for her at the coffee shop and she gave me the dazzlers. She might've said thank you...?
Manners count, boys and girls.
Chatty P Fatt
Dag, yo! I broke up today's parade of tirade into bite sized pieces so as not to choke the average reader.
J plugs away every day in rehearsals for Booty and the Beast. We are relishing our Monday nights and Sunday afternoons (Even though this Sunday we're gonna have more man-well labor in the form of plumbing repairs. Galvanized plumbing will be going bye-bye and replaced with copper. Thank goodness too, 'cause our watta is trickling out sssslllooowwly.)
We had yet another home snafu. J calls me at work yestiddy and sez "Honey, I think we have a problem". Normally I'd freak out like it was a pregnancy scare. (eeeeeeeee) but home-boner's know better. We had a little back up in the basement which caused some pooling. One visit from our friendly neighborhood plumber and the subtraction of $160 from my account, and it was right as rain! (And you folks wonder why I can't get to shows? My house is holding me upside down and shaking out my lunch money!) J's dad, once again, proves how much of a blessing he is to us by being at the house to let in the plumber (Both J and I were working).
The Callboard asked what sort of alternate skills and services you offer outside of theatre that may help peeps in theatre. I didn't think I had much but then I epiphed and said, "Oh...yeah"
Geef, I'd forgotten that I've trained dudes in previous productions starting back at the "U". And dude, you give me way too much credit. It was your disclipine has got you where you need to be, and that shit is sooooo cool.
Rocket came on the radio, again, and I still couldn't figger out the gawdamn lyrics. ROCKET, YEAHH! SAY MAH NAH MAH NAAAAHH!!! GUITAR, drums.... Ah poop. Something, words and stuff.
McConnaghey was on Conan a few nights ago, and last night J's old HS buddy Steve Zahn was on. Both Pimping "Sahara". In my sleepiness, I asked her which I was more like- Dirk Pitt, or funny-buddy. She said "Both, but I thought you were supposed to be Spider Man."
And I need to qualify 2 previous posts.
1) I liked "Closer" because some of the behavior reminded me of how stupid I was when I've been cheated on. It made me think, and I appreciate a movie with dialogue that honest. Although, to my credit, I've never called an "ex" a useless slag. ( Even if they were) I hounded them for details even though it killed me, and turned the whole shebang into an emotional self-flaggellation when in truth the best thing I could've done...is walk away. Reason #602 why I really like who I am now.
2) The Granite City Caesar Salad was swimming in Balsamic Vinegarrete. Which meant my salad tasted like Ah-Nus.
J plugs away every day in rehearsals for Booty and the Beast. We are relishing our Monday nights and Sunday afternoons (Even though this Sunday we're gonna have more man-well labor in the form of plumbing repairs. Galvanized plumbing will be going bye-bye and replaced with copper. Thank goodness too, 'cause our watta is trickling out sssslllooowwly.)
We had yet another home snafu. J calls me at work yestiddy and sez "Honey, I think we have a problem". Normally I'd freak out like it was a pregnancy scare. (eeeeeeeee) but home-boner's know better. We had a little back up in the basement which caused some pooling. One visit from our friendly neighborhood plumber and the subtraction of $160 from my account, and it was right as rain! (And you folks wonder why I can't get to shows? My house is holding me upside down and shaking out my lunch money!) J's dad, once again, proves how much of a blessing he is to us by being at the house to let in the plumber (Both J and I were working).
The Callboard asked what sort of alternate skills and services you offer outside of theatre that may help peeps in theatre. I didn't think I had much but then I epiphed and said, "Oh...yeah"
Geef, I'd forgotten that I've trained dudes in previous productions starting back at the "U". And dude, you give me way too much credit. It was your disclipine has got you where you need to be, and that shit is sooooo cool.
Rocket came on the radio, again, and I still couldn't figger out the gawdamn lyrics. ROCKET, YEAHH! SAY MAH NAH MAH NAAAAHH!!! GUITAR, drums.... Ah poop. Something, words and stuff.
McConnaghey was on Conan a few nights ago, and last night J's old HS buddy Steve Zahn was on. Both Pimping "Sahara". In my sleepiness, I asked her which I was more like- Dirk Pitt, or funny-buddy. She said "Both, but I thought you were supposed to be Spider Man."
And I need to qualify 2 previous posts.
1) I liked "Closer" because some of the behavior reminded me of how stupid I was when I've been cheated on. It made me think, and I appreciate a movie with dialogue that honest. Although, to my credit, I've never called an "ex" a useless slag. ( Even if they were) I hounded them for details even though it killed me, and turned the whole shebang into an emotional self-flaggellation when in truth the best thing I could've done...is walk away. Reason #602 why I really like who I am now.
2) The Granite City Caesar Salad was swimming in Balsamic Vinegarrete. Which meant my salad tasted like Ah-Nus.
Thursday, April 07, 2005
Tired again...
I had this overnight Best Buy shoot on Sunday and I still haven't recovered yet, and today I'm so tired that my eyes feel like they are floating outside my body. Actually they are- It's this little trick a yogi showed me once, called the old "floating eyeball" schtick. See, SEE? I be so tired...I making more dumb-ass jokes. And bad Engrish.
Being that this is the 2nd overnight shoot in 2 months and I've been called out on a film audition this Saturday, I'm thinking that something shite is gonna happen quick. That's the Karma talking. There has to be a balance somewhere. Still, I need the moe-neh.
I've taken to jogging out of doors again. The weather, thankfully, has been beautiful enough to cater to serious hoof-time. The other day I was out on a nice run and I thought I'd head up to the park where J and I went a few weeks back. Let's just say I went too far this time. I was a ways away (for me, my long distance lovelies who read this) and by about mile 4 away from home I uttered a little curse, and turned back. My short cut became a long cut, and let's just say that I scared the poor garage salers whom I patronized on my return jaunt. (Sweaty half-nekkid dough boy perusing their old 45's)
The movie "Closer"? Ehhhhhh good- but it was prolly a better play. Clive Owen and Porkman's movie, and Jude looked like he needed a vacation.
The movie "Dodgeball"? Freaking loved it. I read someones review that said that he hates "dumb" movies like this, but my cineast friends hold different opinions. (Matt Anderson said to me once "There is a character called 'Steve the Pirate', and he's a pirate for no other reason that they wanted to put a pirate in the movie!". That is frickin awesome.
The Caesar Bruschetta Salad at Granite City Brewery? Sucked two ways worth of ass. Avoid.
Yes, I was naked in a student film back in 1994. 6 hours filming in a seedy Cathedral Hill apartment, while the funeral for two St.Paul cops was going on right outside the window. My best friend and sound guy, eye level with the little P. Yes, I was supposed to be naked. No, the final shot filmed was barely an inch above my crack. While I have no problem with nudity in film, tv, theatre, or personally...the worst is wasted nudity. And I dieted hard for that movie. Ooooooooo haaaard.
Being that this is the 2nd overnight shoot in 2 months and I've been called out on a film audition this Saturday, I'm thinking that something shite is gonna happen quick. That's the Karma talking. There has to be a balance somewhere. Still, I need the moe-neh.
I've taken to jogging out of doors again. The weather, thankfully, has been beautiful enough to cater to serious hoof-time. The other day I was out on a nice run and I thought I'd head up to the park where J and I went a few weeks back. Let's just say I went too far this time. I was a ways away (for me, my long distance lovelies who read this) and by about mile 4 away from home I uttered a little curse, and turned back. My short cut became a long cut, and let's just say that I scared the poor garage salers whom I patronized on my return jaunt. (Sweaty half-nekkid dough boy perusing their old 45's)
The movie "Closer"? Ehhhhhh good- but it was prolly a better play. Clive Owen and Porkman's movie, and Jude looked like he needed a vacation.
The movie "Dodgeball"? Freaking loved it. I read someones review that said that he hates "dumb" movies like this, but my cineast friends hold different opinions. (Matt Anderson said to me once "There is a character called 'Steve the Pirate', and he's a pirate for no other reason that they wanted to put a pirate in the movie!". That is frickin awesome.
The Caesar Bruschetta Salad at Granite City Brewery? Sucked two ways worth of ass. Avoid.
Yes, I was naked in a student film back in 1994. 6 hours filming in a seedy Cathedral Hill apartment, while the funeral for two St.Paul cops was going on right outside the window. My best friend and sound guy, eye level with the little P. Yes, I was supposed to be naked. No, the final shot filmed was barely an inch above my crack. While I have no problem with nudity in film, tv, theatre, or personally...the worst is wasted nudity. And I dieted hard for that movie. Ooooooooo haaaard.
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
I saw the Geef...
I made reference in a previous post about how The Geef went on this super duper diet for his nude scene in "Gay Damn Yankee's". I've heard 'round town how he has since lost boo-teau weight, and I've being curious about his results. I haven't seen the guy since pre-diet, so I thought it would be cool to check out the show for which he disciplined himself so meticulously and see the results at that time. For me, it's kinda like not seeing the bride before the wedding...I just wanted a little surprise.
So the flappin frassin Star Trib runs an article on the show, complete with big honkin' pics of the Geef inside. Okay, so technically I already saw the ad (with the Louisville Mustache) but I wanted the frickin' Sally Jesse Before and After SURPRISE!!! FAAAHK! Yeah Yeah, I know it wasn't a "telling photo" but leave it to the porkchops at the Strib to ruin my fun.
I'm gonna wind up catching a glimpse of J in her wedding dress...I know it.
So the flappin frassin Star Trib runs an article on the show, complete with big honkin' pics of the Geef inside. Okay, so technically I already saw the ad (with the Louisville Mustache) but I wanted the frickin' Sally Jesse Before and After SURPRISE!!! FAAAHK! Yeah Yeah, I know it wasn't a "telling photo" but leave it to the porkchops at the Strib to ruin my fun.
I'm gonna wind up catching a glimpse of J in her wedding dress...I know it.
Sunday, April 03, 2005
P.o. P
(* Passion of the Pope)
From a religious standpoint- Pope John Paul II was the largest profile character of my memory, and I'll freely admit that while not catholic, it's an occasion that is marked with sadness and also amazement. (A selfish milestone to mark in my life when high-profile individuals of note start to pass away). Sadder still, comedian Mitch Hedberg has also passed. The passing of two individuals who followed their passion is a very sad, sad occassion regardless of the inevitability.
That said: If you believe in heaven, or the afterlife... it's probably nice to go with an opening act.
( I'll let you decide who is opening for who)
From a religious standpoint- Pope John Paul II was the largest profile character of my memory, and I'll freely admit that while not catholic, it's an occasion that is marked with sadness and also amazement. (A selfish milestone to mark in my life when high-profile individuals of note start to pass away). Sadder still, comedian Mitch Hedberg has also passed. The passing of two individuals who followed their passion is a very sad, sad occassion regardless of the inevitability.
That said: If you believe in heaven, or the afterlife... it's probably nice to go with an opening act.
( I'll let you decide who is opening for who)
Saturday, April 02, 2005
Whatever you do...
....
Don't practice bo forms (I mean, don't play "Darth Maul") with the poles that "J" painted red for her dance class competition. She'll get mad.
Don't practice bo forms (I mean, don't play "Darth Maul") with the poles that "J" painted red for her dance class competition. She'll get mad.
Friday, April 01, 2005
The sucktitude of moving
Man...I could rail on and on about this new office! It takes me almost 8 minutes to heat up soup! Do you hear me? SOOOOUUP!!!! I'm nearing the completion of the 1st week and I realize that using the analogy "growing pains" to describe the move is inaccurate. More like trying to squeeze yer buns into that pair of Girbaud's you loved so much in the 10th grade. Nah-Gah-Happah* (Not gonna happen). Oh, and the building cafeteria? Called the "servery".
Lame cubed.
Saw "AG" again last night for the ladies final show as Reno and She sounded even better than Sunday (Finding her sea legs and all that) Big bro, his weef, and my old dear friend gay Steve were in attendance. Steve and I did "AG" together back in hoch schule, so it was a fun little trip down mem'ry lane for the both of us. 2 errors in the evenings plan were (1) deciding to pick his butt up at his home in Shakooppee and (2) letting him smoke in my car. I told him that I wouldn't care if he did, but man...now my car smells like Newpimp Lights. Eeeeeeeyyyeew.
This whole smoking infringement argument is making me kinda laugh. S's and NS's alike know that smoking is bad for you, Right? Smoking has been banned in most every public place except for designated area's. I can even remember being in grade school where plumes of smoke issued from the teachers lounge (Or In HS it was called "Dirtball Hall") These were issues that were pretty big in their time. People keep missing the historical perspective of issues, and when they come up again the forgetfullness creates a fervor that can blind us from issues that are of greater importance. And the biggest thing, that this too shall pass. If the decision to ban smoking from certain bars destroys the economy within five years...I owe my readers a Coke. And a carton of Camels.
Funny side story: My 6th grade teacher had a daughter who eventually went into acting and now gigs here in the cities. A few years ago, we were in a show and I had the chance to meet with she and her folks for cocktails. (It seemed kinda fun. Having drinks with my 6th grade teacher...the one time bane of my 11/12 year old existence). Anyway, Mrs. N told me that she used to smoke. She started laughing at my agog expression and she explained "Oh yes, I smoked in the class room, correcting papers. In fact, I know I needed a smoke when correcting your tests..."
Last, but not least: I don't get hung up on image and I never have. People who freak over that shit need a better hobby...cause it's a waste of time. To be cool? I think you need some fucking discipline. Discipline is pretty cool too. And being healthy, losing weight, exercising, forcing yourself to try and get enough sleep, gagging your way through a job that doesn't have as much meaning as your passion? Making a relationship work? Helping a partner quit smoking and dealing with the bad tempers and shit that comes with it? INSTEAD of saying, "Fuck you- I'm going to the bar....?" 7th grade is thataway. That's why the Target Market is 12-17 year olds.
I'm fairly certain that I'm still cool. I even engage in some fairly dangerous practices myself- And I don't need a gun. Fucking Chuck Norris.
(ps: Brandon Lee's last interview ---Man smoked like a mo-fo'ing chimney. It's all about personal choice, is all I'm saying.)
Lame cubed.
Saw "AG" again last night for the ladies final show as Reno and She sounded even better than Sunday (Finding her sea legs and all that) Big bro, his weef, and my old dear friend gay Steve were in attendance. Steve and I did "AG" together back in hoch schule, so it was a fun little trip down mem'ry lane for the both of us. 2 errors in the evenings plan were (1) deciding to pick his butt up at his home in Shakooppee and (2) letting him smoke in my car. I told him that I wouldn't care if he did, but man...now my car smells like Newpimp Lights. Eeeeeeeyyyeew.
This whole smoking infringement argument is making me kinda laugh. S's and NS's alike know that smoking is bad for you, Right? Smoking has been banned in most every public place except for designated area's. I can even remember being in grade school where plumes of smoke issued from the teachers lounge (Or In HS it was called "Dirtball Hall") These were issues that were pretty big in their time. People keep missing the historical perspective of issues, and when they come up again the forgetfullness creates a fervor that can blind us from issues that are of greater importance. And the biggest thing, that this too shall pass. If the decision to ban smoking from certain bars destroys the economy within five years...I owe my readers a Coke. And a carton of Camels.
Funny side story: My 6th grade teacher had a daughter who eventually went into acting and now gigs here in the cities. A few years ago, we were in a show and I had the chance to meet with she and her folks for cocktails. (It seemed kinda fun. Having drinks with my 6th grade teacher...the one time bane of my 11/12 year old existence). Anyway, Mrs. N told me that she used to smoke. She started laughing at my agog expression and she explained "Oh yes, I smoked in the class room, correcting papers. In fact, I know I needed a smoke when correcting your tests..."
Last, but not least: I don't get hung up on image and I never have. People who freak over that shit need a better hobby...cause it's a waste of time. To be cool? I think you need some fucking discipline. Discipline is pretty cool too. And being healthy, losing weight, exercising, forcing yourself to try and get enough sleep, gagging your way through a job that doesn't have as much meaning as your passion? Making a relationship work? Helping a partner quit smoking and dealing with the bad tempers and shit that comes with it? INSTEAD of saying, "Fuck you- I'm going to the bar....?" 7th grade is thataway. That's why the Target Market is 12-17 year olds.
I'm fairly certain that I'm still cool. I even engage in some fairly dangerous practices myself- And I don't need a gun. Fucking Chuck Norris.
(ps: Brandon Lee's last interview ---Man smoked like a mo-fo'ing chimney. It's all about personal choice, is all I'm saying.)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)