Holiday Post-Mortem...CSI style.

I killed Christmas...didn't I?


Sap protection program. Yes, I have latex gloves readily available. Are you scared yet? (You should be...*)

So I came home the other day (1/1/2007) to discover a frassy Jellybean strip strip stripping the tree of ornaments. He took to heart my comment regarding "making sure the holidays are actually 'over-over' after the New Year". I folded and put the inexpensive (yet tasteful) tree skirt away when I planted my hand smack dab in some gloppy sappy glue. And crud, does that shit take forever to get off your hands. I was sticking to everything. Even the soap dispenser which threatened to remain permanently affixed to my thumb. So I donned some gloves (With the residual sap that wouldn't come off? Well, let's just say taking the gloves off was a chore into itself) and took down the Holiday. Dragging it out to the alley for it's final destination in the Gray Haven...for tree's.

Sick as I am? (I have the day off today) Doesn't the tree in the tree bag look like it's wrapped in a tree "body" bag? (If you've ever seen the original "Nightmare on Elm Street" you'll know what I'm talking about) And then here's me with my latex gloves....Have I just been watching too much "Six Feet Under" for my own good? Ugh. Don't question my subconcious. I won't even begin to tell you about my Ny-Quil infused dreams last night. Two words...okay, technically three. Aztec. Bat wings. 'Nuff Said.






*Seriously, when you did as much painting frass as I did around here, you have shit like latex gloves lying about. And you know? The less expensive tree's on the lot? They're not all that bad. For a last minute tree frasser, I think I did okay. BUT, it's the fucking needles'll get ya. Seriously, the cheap tree's have punji darts for needles. And they hide, so when you're cleaning that corner next...oh, let's say "Spring"? Ya plant your foot RIGHT in the tree needle the vaccuum missed. Oof. I just got goosepimples thinking about it.