Man...I could rail on and on about this new office! It takes me almost 8 minutes to heat up soup! Do you hear me? SOOOOUUP!!!! I'm nearing the completion of the 1st week and I realize that using the analogy "growing pains" to describe the move is inaccurate. More like trying to squeeze yer buns into that pair of Girbaud's you loved so much in the 10th grade. Nah-Gah-Happah* (Not gonna happen). Oh, and the building cafeteria? Called the "servery".
Lame cubed.
Saw "AG" again last night for the ladies final show as Reno and She sounded even better than Sunday (Finding her sea legs and all that) Big bro, his weef, and my old dear friend gay Steve were in attendance. Steve and I did "AG" together back in hoch schule, so it was a fun little trip down mem'ry lane for the both of us. 2 errors in the evenings plan were (1) deciding to pick his butt up at his home in Shakooppee and (2) letting him smoke in my car. I told him that I wouldn't care if he did, but man...now my car smells like Newpimp Lights. Eeeeeeeyyyeew.
This whole smoking infringement argument is making me kinda laugh. S's and NS's alike know that smoking is bad for you, Right? Smoking has been banned in most every public place except for designated area's. I can even remember being in grade school where plumes of smoke issued from the teachers lounge (Or In HS it was called "Dirtball Hall") These were issues that were pretty big in their time. People keep missing the historical perspective of issues, and when they come up again the forgetfullness creates a fervor that can blind us from issues that are of greater importance. And the biggest thing, that this too shall pass. If the decision to ban smoking from certain bars destroys the economy within five years...I owe my readers a Coke. And a carton of Camels.
Funny side story: My 6th grade teacher had a daughter who eventually went into acting and now gigs here in the cities. A few years ago, we were in a show and I had the chance to meet with she and her folks for cocktails. (It seemed kinda fun. Having drinks with my 6th grade teacher...the one time bane of my 11/12 year old existence). Anyway, Mrs. N told me that she used to smoke. She started laughing at my agog expression and she explained "Oh yes, I smoked in the class room, correcting papers. In fact, I know I needed a smoke when correcting your tests..."
Last, but not least: I don't get hung up on image and I never have. People who freak over that shit need a better hobby...cause it's a waste of time. To be cool? I think you need some fucking discipline. Discipline is pretty cool too. And being healthy, losing weight, exercising, forcing yourself to try and get enough sleep, gagging your way through a job that doesn't have as much meaning as your passion? Making a relationship work? Helping a partner quit smoking and dealing with the bad tempers and shit that comes with it? INSTEAD of saying, "Fuck you- I'm going to the bar....?" 7th grade is thataway. That's why the Target Market is 12-17 year olds.
I'm fairly certain that I'm still cool. I even engage in some fairly dangerous practices myself- And I don't need a gun. Fucking Chuck Norris.
(ps: Brandon Lee's last interview ---Man smoked like a mo-fo'ing chimney. It's all about personal choice, is all I'm saying.)
Friday, April 01, 2005
Thursday, March 31, 2005
Break Room is now the Pantry
I've been feeling so vindictive since my office move, I'm gonna go over to the old "Pantry" with my letter opener, pry off the letter "R"...so that it reads "Panty"....
At least 3 of my co-workers thought that was funny.
Speaking of funny, I watched the movie "Dodgeball" last night. NEARLY had a coronary. It was some funny crappy. Joanie loves Chachi!!!
At least 3 of my co-workers thought that was funny.
Speaking of funny, I watched the movie "Dodgeball" last night. NEARLY had a coronary. It was some funny crappy. Joanie loves Chachi!!!
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
I get a kick...outta J.
If I neglected to mention this before, J has been on as Reno all week long. On Easter Sunday, both of our families got together for the occasion. As I looked around the booth at mom, dad, and big brother…it occurred to me that this was the 1st time the 4 of us had got together without spouses, fiancée’s, girlfriends, etc in a very long time. And that furthered the enjoyment of a spectacular performance.
I bored the pants off of folks at Meag’s going away party last night, but let me say that J really nailed her shit. I knew she could dance (la la la) and sing well (Just a couple of mini-solo’s in past productions) but damn…the pipes on that girl! Watching her during the title number, took me back to the 1st time I remember ever laying eyes on her in "Crazy for You", all those years ago. (Before engagements and houses took over our lives) The way she whooped, hollered, cajoled her other cast mates, it was like she was having the time of her life. Without sounding like a reviewer, she increased the energy of the numbers every time she got on stage. And was she funny? Funnier than I thought . My parents and brother gushed, and made reservations to see her again the next day. (I’m going again tomorrow night.) One of the old hacks at the Chan said to her "Honey, when Michael (Chan AD) get’s home, I’m letting him know that your chorus girl days are numbered." And you wondered what all the fuss was about? I really wish you could all see it.
My buddy from the bar (Elsies) in the last weekend was Iron Glen (Due to his strange love of all things Iron Man). If y'all remember my posting about superheroes a few weeks ago, he was the one who drug me back into the world of comics with Gaiman titles. I hadn't seen him in 4 years, but it was flipping awesome to have ran into him.
Last but not least, I wanted to give a shout out to my girl Meags, who is transplanting with her man to sunny CA to chase the dream. Best of luck to you on your first time relocating, and remember: Change is good. 2 for 1's are even better. Also, I was able to say congrats to RPK and CRT, those two lovebirds. AND, I get a flier last night for this show, and they covered up the GeeF’s handsome mug! The man now has a Louisville Slugger mustache! ; )
I need to get out more. I've got too many shows to get caught up on, including the aforementioned link, Rick III, and a plethora of TRP shows. Whew. Having a break is fine, but damn, I finna be busy!
I bored the pants off of folks at Meag’s going away party last night, but let me say that J really nailed her shit. I knew she could dance (la la la) and sing well (Just a couple of mini-solo’s in past productions) but damn…the pipes on that girl! Watching her during the title number, took me back to the 1st time I remember ever laying eyes on her in "Crazy for You", all those years ago. (Before engagements and houses took over our lives) The way she whooped, hollered, cajoled her other cast mates, it was like she was having the time of her life. Without sounding like a reviewer, she increased the energy of the numbers every time she got on stage. And was she funny? Funnier than I thought . My parents and brother gushed, and made reservations to see her again the next day. (I’m going again tomorrow night.) One of the old hacks at the Chan said to her "Honey, when Michael (Chan AD) get’s home, I’m letting him know that your chorus girl days are numbered." And you wondered what all the fuss was about? I really wish you could all see it.
My buddy from the bar (Elsies) in the last weekend was Iron Glen (Due to his strange love of all things Iron Man). If y'all remember my posting about superheroes a few weeks ago, he was the one who drug me back into the world of comics with Gaiman titles. I hadn't seen him in 4 years, but it was flipping awesome to have ran into him.
Last but not least, I wanted to give a shout out to my girl Meags, who is transplanting with her man to sunny CA to chase the dream. Best of luck to you on your first time relocating, and remember: Change is good. 2 for 1's are even better. Also, I was able to say congrats to RPK and CRT, those two lovebirds. AND, I get a flier last night for this show, and they covered up the GeeF’s handsome mug! The man now has a Louisville Slugger mustache! ; )
I need to get out more. I've got too many shows to get caught up on, including the aforementioned link, Rick III, and a plethora of TRP shows. Whew. Having a break is fine, but damn, I finna be busy!
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
EeeB's Weekend *
* Easter Bun-Bun. Thanks Easter Bunny, BUCK BUCK!!!
The move to my new worksite is gonna put a cramp I my style. I’m in what’s called a "High-Profile" area, which means I have managers (Putting the "Anger" back in "mANaGER!") who are now micro-managing. This really sucks.
Anyhey, the weekend….Recap time:
I hit up Elsies for a little karaoke. Kaiser and the Tallen were in attendence (I was told a certain Mother was too pooped out to join…poor thing.) J was even up for going but I eventually ki-boshed staying out late in lieu of face time with my love. While Kaiser razzed me about drinking a Diet beverage (In my defense, I did have a glass of veeno at home earlier in the evening.) Elsie’s has now re-affirmed my general sense of indifference towards karate-okey.
Elsie’s is one of the few bars that carry one of my favorite karaoke tunes (Favorite meaning it’s in my range w/out making me sound like a dying walrus) however the dicksauce that was MC’ing took it upon himself to "sing along" right behind me. In my ear. Dude, seriously, STFU. Baaad form. I emcee'd the shit, dork-pie...even if the person is singing pitchy, you just leave'em the farg alone!
My second problem of the evening, was the hecklers- More specifically A heckler. I'm guilty as the next person of wincing or rolling my eyes at some of the other amateur singers that grip the mic, but most of the time we keep our commentary to ourselves. Yet, I overheard this mean guy actually booing some singers and I found it more than a little insensitive. Don’t ask me why it tripped off my spider-sense, but it did. After his 1st,very loud "Boooo" I looked over at he and his posse which I think included a girlfriend. (She had her arm around him, and shot me one of those very embarrassed "I’m sorry" kinda looks.) He had about 2 more LOUD boo’s in him when I decided that I had enough.
I am pleased to say that in my tenure as both a drinker and martial artist, I have successfully avoided all potentially "martial" confrontations through a skilled blend of passive aggression, and comedic BS'ing. The reason is that bar fights never go as well as they do in the movies, and in a sue-happy society it just isn’t worth it. It also isn't worth the trouble of wage garnishment, potential incarceration, or getting 80 million jiggawatts of taser up your ass from an overzealous cop. (Remember the 'Cloud, Geef?)
I think I did well enough with this one: After his repeated booing, I gave him the angry stare (Oooo, the dojo vibe) and when he had finally made eye contact I said "That’s really rude", not breaking eye contact until he finally turned away. And then I left. Jerkoff. Well, that’s enough machismo for one blog. I can’t stands it when people show disrespect to complete strangers, especially when they happen to be doing karaoke, Especiall-ier when they are comrades of mine.
I didn’t even get to say that I ran into a very old and dear friend there. That’s one positive spin on the evening!
More positive hits later…my boss be starin’!!!
The move to my new worksite is gonna put a cramp I my style. I’m in what’s called a "High-Profile" area, which means I have managers (Putting the "Anger" back in "mANaGER!") who are now micro-managing. This really sucks.
Anyhey, the weekend….Recap time:
I hit up Elsies for a little karaoke. Kaiser and the Tallen were in attendence (I was told a certain Mother was too pooped out to join…poor thing.) J was even up for going but I eventually ki-boshed staying out late in lieu of face time with my love. While Kaiser razzed me about drinking a Diet beverage (In my defense, I did have a glass of veeno at home earlier in the evening.) Elsie’s has now re-affirmed my general sense of indifference towards karate-okey.
Elsie’s is one of the few bars that carry one of my favorite karaoke tunes (Favorite meaning it’s in my range w/out making me sound like a dying walrus) however the dicksauce that was MC’ing took it upon himself to "sing along" right behind me. In my ear. Dude, seriously, STFU. Baaad form. I emcee'd the shit, dork-pie...even if the person is singing pitchy, you just leave'em the farg alone!
My second problem of the evening, was the hecklers- More specifically A heckler. I'm guilty as the next person of wincing or rolling my eyes at some of the other amateur singers that grip the mic, but most of the time we keep our commentary to ourselves. Yet, I overheard this mean guy actually booing some singers and I found it more than a little insensitive. Don’t ask me why it tripped off my spider-sense, but it did. After his 1st,very loud "Boooo" I looked over at he and his posse which I think included a girlfriend. (She had her arm around him, and shot me one of those very embarrassed "I’m sorry" kinda looks.) He had about 2 more LOUD boo’s in him when I decided that I had enough.
I am pleased to say that in my tenure as both a drinker and martial artist, I have successfully avoided all potentially "martial" confrontations through a skilled blend of passive aggression, and comedic BS'ing. The reason is that bar fights never go as well as they do in the movies, and in a sue-happy society it just isn’t worth it. It also isn't worth the trouble of wage garnishment, potential incarceration, or getting 80 million jiggawatts of taser up your ass from an overzealous cop. (Remember the 'Cloud, Geef?)
I think I did well enough with this one: After his repeated booing, I gave him the angry stare (Oooo, the dojo vibe) and when he had finally made eye contact I said "That’s really rude", not breaking eye contact until he finally turned away. And then I left. Jerkoff. Well, that’s enough machismo for one blog. I can’t stands it when people show disrespect to complete strangers, especially when they happen to be doing karaoke, Especiall-ier when they are comrades of mine.
I didn’t even get to say that I ran into a very old and dear friend there. That’s one positive spin on the evening!
More positive hits later…my boss be starin’!!!
Thursday, March 24, 2005
Growing Pains/Time to move
From a work standpoint, this month has been higgledy piggledy. My office has deemed the rent prices in our current locale to be a bit exorbitant, so a few years ago they decided to build their own building, which has recently been finished. So now we're moving from one point in the NW suburbs, to another point in the NW Suburbs. (Couldn't have built a building closer to Minneapolis, couldja? No? Grumblefuck.) I've recently been told the new bldg is too small for our business needs. (Read: My new office will also be used for storageand to hold mini-meetings.) And don't get me started about the actual moving process. We actually had to have a meeting scheduled to show us how to assemble the moving boxes, and also where to place the "move sticker" on the box . (Hint: It's the spot on the box that says "affix move sticker here")
We're also told what they will move for us (PC's and any "file-type" things), what we need to move ourselves (Everything else- staplers/tape dispenser/pictures etc.) , and what we can't have (Radios, desk lamps, and plants. ) Fruity Pebbles, NOW I've got to bring home a wilting fern and hydrangea . I've also been volunteered (ordered) to come in over our blessed 3 day weekend and "test" the new systems to make sure they are up and running . Sweaty Balls! There goes my weekend. Did I mention the building is too small? It blows goats, folks.
Quick Hits: (On a positive note)
-I found my route. That's right kittens, I now have a jogging route in my neighborhood. It's the perfect blend of challenging uphills to start off, tapering to a nice descent on my return path along the parkway totalling 3 to 5 miles depending on my mood. I was navigating this course last evening and did not see these wooden vines sticking out from a retaining wall fence. So, I took a wooden vine square in the eyeball. Yes, it does hurt. And I look like I'm baked my left eye is so fargin bloodshot.
-J goes in for an 8 show stint as "Reno Sweeney" (read: Lead Chick) starting tonight. This is good for her professionally to show the director and producers that she is a good singer in addition to being a very talented dancer. It's also good for her physically (Reno doesn't engage in as much dancing as the "Angels", meaning she won't be as pooped.) We're all very excited for her and both of our fam damnilies are gonna see her Sunday afternoon. This will mark the 3rd time I've seen "Anything Goes", and could quite possibly meet the record for the number of times I saw "Cats" (5...I love my girl and I get in for free.) Send positive thoughts!
I've got to finish packing now. I'll post tomorrow from home on "Good Friday". Why is it "Good Friday"? Because I get the motherloving day off, that's why! Oh wait...I still have to come in this weekend. AHHHHRRHGGGH!!!
We're also told what they will move for us (PC's and any "file-type" things), what we need to move ourselves (Everything else- staplers/tape dispenser/pictures etc.) , and what we can't have (Radios, desk lamps, and plants. ) Fruity Pebbles, NOW I've got to bring home a wilting fern and hydrangea . I've also been volunteered (ordered) to come in over our blessed 3 day weekend and "test" the new systems to make sure they are up and running . Sweaty Balls! There goes my weekend. Did I mention the building is too small? It blows goats, folks.
Quick Hits: (On a positive note)
-I found my route. That's right kittens, I now have a jogging route in my neighborhood. It's the perfect blend of challenging uphills to start off, tapering to a nice descent on my return path along the parkway totalling 3 to 5 miles depending on my mood. I was navigating this course last evening and did not see these wooden vines sticking out from a retaining wall fence. So, I took a wooden vine square in the eyeball. Yes, it does hurt. And I look like I'm baked my left eye is so fargin bloodshot.
-J goes in for an 8 show stint as "Reno Sweeney" (read: Lead Chick) starting tonight. This is good for her professionally to show the director and producers that she is a good singer in addition to being a very talented dancer. It's also good for her physically (Reno doesn't engage in as much dancing as the "Angels", meaning she won't be as pooped.) We're all very excited for her and both of our fam damnilies are gonna see her Sunday afternoon. This will mark the 3rd time I've seen "Anything Goes", and could quite possibly meet the record for the number of times I saw "Cats" (5...I love my girl and I get in for free.) Send positive thoughts!
I've got to finish packing now. I'll post tomorrow from home on "Good Friday". Why is it "Good Friday"? Because I get the motherloving day off, that's why! Oh wait...I still have to come in this weekend. AHHHHRRHGGGH!!!
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
It's close...I can feel it.
I'm trying to figure out what I want to be for Halloween this year. I wanna head start on any potential costume building that may need to take place. Here are a few suggestions (And the accompanying pics) , but feel free to post your own.
Dirk Pitt (From "Sahara") This flick could be a total mort, but the costume looks easy enough. Plus it'll give me enough time to get in shape...I hope.
Patrick Bateman: (From "American Psycho") I'm thinking little Empire of the Sun boy is a pretty good actor. Costume should be easy: Grey pinstripe suit, Power Tie, Business Cards, Video Tapes, and a plastic butcher knife. Easy. Or I could wear the "chainsaw" outfit: Naked except for sneakers and a well placed toy chainsaw over the HEY-OH!!! Plus, it'll give me enough time to get in shape...I hope. He's gonna be a cool Batman.
Die Spinne: (Well...duh.) Last Halloween, I wore that crappy "costume in a bag" that I've had for years. Well I've got the materials (My dancer girl has dark blue and red spandex for days) and the desire- I just lack initiative, time, and any sewing prowess. Oh well. The less time I put into cobbling it together, the more time I have to get into shape...I hope.
Something from work: (Like a Pirate Bunny) I get one free rental during the Halloween season. That's anywhere from $70 to $120 bucks. I just hate to be one of my own customers. I don't like my customers, and I'd really like to continue liking myself.
What else? I think about this stuff until October 31st, then I scramble to throw something together at the last minute...like last year.
Dirk Pitt (From "Sahara") This flick could be a total mort, but the costume looks easy enough. Plus it'll give me enough time to get in shape...I hope.
Patrick Bateman: (From "American Psycho") I'm thinking little Empire of the Sun boy is a pretty good actor. Costume should be easy: Grey pinstripe suit, Power Tie, Business Cards, Video Tapes, and a plastic butcher knife. Easy. Or I could wear the "chainsaw" outfit: Naked except for sneakers and a well placed toy chainsaw over the HEY-OH!!! Plus, it'll give me enough time to get in shape...I hope. He's gonna be a cool Batman.
Die Spinne: (Well...duh.) Last Halloween, I wore that crappy "costume in a bag" that I've had for years. Well I've got the materials (My dancer girl has dark blue and red spandex for days) and the desire- I just lack initiative, time, and any sewing prowess. Oh well. The less time I put into cobbling it together, the more time I have to get into shape...I hope.
Something from work: (Like a Pirate Bunny) I get one free rental during the Halloween season. That's anywhere from $70 to $120 bucks. I just hate to be one of my own customers. I don't like my customers, and I'd really like to continue liking myself.
What else? I think about this stuff until October 31st, then I scramble to throw something together at the last minute...like last year.
Naked Neck
I got a haircut the other day. It had been a goodly while since my last one, due to the need for a little x-tra on top for my Elvis Pompadou. I kept it long througout last summer for the Fall Picasso re-mount... Even though I was convinced that I was going to be re-cast with a much better actor. "Crimes" followed a few months later, & since it's set in 1974 I decided to keep the locks long. (Again, figuring the Bee-Gee look was probably in at the time.) What can I say? I'm a "hair" actor. (And a Back Actor...just so long as I'm not a "hairy-backed Actor") I can see the text in college classrooms now: "The Coiffed Actor Prepares...their Hair" by Posislavski.
Reaching, P...that was waaaay reaching.
Anyhey, once the 'cut was done, I looked down to the remnant pile of my hair- Now resembling approximately 3 chihuahua's. I paid the nice lady, and split. And what do I notice 1st? My neck was Fuh-REEZING! Dammit. I'll miss you, long locks. Rest in pieces.
Reaching, P...that was waaaay reaching.
Anyhey, once the 'cut was done, I looked down to the remnant pile of my hair- Now resembling approximately 3 chihuahua's. I paid the nice lady, and split. And what do I notice 1st? My neck was Fuh-REEZING! Dammit. I'll miss you, long locks. Rest in pieces.
Tuesday, March 22, 2005
Last hit: "Why don't they fit?"
Damn, so many posts.
I own two pair of the same brand of jeans. One, a blue jean. The other: Same jeans, only in black. Both, the exact-same-size. Waist and Length. Equal on the tags.
Now, my little mathematicians: Why are the black jeans are so damn snug? (And, a hair shorter on the length?) Making me feel FAT!!!
And I shoulda qualified this Kaiser. I actually like the fat-free shite and eating healthy. I know it's a little crazy of me, but it's become habitual. (Real butter, Sweets/Cakes and super rich foods make me a kinda nauseous. I won't turn them down, say, if I'm offered at a dinner, or if I'm travelling and it's "on the menu". I just don't make it a point to make or buy the stuff for myself. You're absolutely right, life is too short- And right now, so are my pants.)
STAY AWAY FROM EDDIE BAUER JEANS!!! I AM TOO-TIGHT JEAN MAN!!!
I own two pair of the same brand of jeans. One, a blue jean. The other: Same jeans, only in black. Both, the exact-same-size. Waist and Length. Equal on the tags.
Now, my little mathematicians: Why are the black jeans are so damn snug? (And, a hair shorter on the length?) Making me feel FAT!!!
And I shoulda qualified this Kaiser. I actually like the fat-free shite and eating healthy. I know it's a little crazy of me, but it's become habitual. (Real butter, Sweets/Cakes and super rich foods make me a kinda nauseous. I won't turn them down, say, if I'm offered at a dinner, or if I'm travelling and it's "on the menu". I just don't make it a point to make or buy the stuff for myself. You're absolutely right, life is too short- And right now, so are my pants.)
STAY AWAY FROM EDDIE BAUER JEANS!!! I AM TOO-TIGHT JEAN MAN!!!
Troy sucks
J and I had our Monday night together last night, so we decided to shop for bookshelves (To create a "Bookshelf Closet Wall", grab dinner and a movie. Dinner was fine (A Crapplebee's gift card we'd been sitting on for a few months) and while we were digesting the last vestiges of Tilapia (me) and Garlic Mash (her), we threw in our latest rental from VIDEO STARDOM!!!
Troy: Sucked Trojan Ass. Skip it. Skipitskipitskipit.
Comment #1 (before she fell asleep from boredom) "There'd better be either some fucking or fighting, 'cause this movie is boring the shit outta me!" (cue J Laughter)
Comment # 2: (Lovey Dovey scene between Legolas and WhutsHerButt) P- "Christ...Act lately, Helen?" and J's "He sucks too."
Comment #3: "Poor Peter O'Toole. That guy was in, like, Creator..."
Comment #4: "Pitt's pointing his sword again. Just...pointing"
Comment #5: "Are you still full from dinner? I mean to, y' know? What? Oh..you're sleeping. Riiiight"
Avoid. This movie will cause dumbness.
Troy: Sucked Trojan Ass. Skip it. Skipitskipitskipit.
Comment #1 (before she fell asleep from boredom) "There'd better be either some fucking or fighting, 'cause this movie is boring the shit outta me!" (cue J Laughter)
Comment # 2: (Lovey Dovey scene between Legolas and WhutsHerButt) P- "Christ...Act lately, Helen?" and J's "He sucks too."
Comment #3: "Poor Peter O'Toole. That guy was in, like, Creator..."
Comment #4: "Pitt's pointing his sword again. Just...pointing"
Comment #5: "Are you still full from dinner? I mean to, y' know? What? Oh..you're sleeping. Riiiight"
Avoid. This movie will cause dumbness.
I eat like shite.
Due to all the flak I get regarding my diet, I'm getting pretty self conscious nowadays 'cause of how I eat. I can't help it folks, since my dad's angiogram in 1989, my family just started eating healthier. I just stayed with it. (Sorry mom, dad, and bro.)
If you've ever read what a bodybuilder or athlete's in training eat- that's me. Not the 3 to 5000 calories, but the type food: Plain. Plain water packed tuna, which illicit's the "Ewwww, what's that smell" response from my co-workers (Now I have to make stealth trips into the breakroom to open the can, get it ready, clean out the can, and hope that no one is the wiser. Still, it can't smell anyworse than their burned microwave popcorn or shitty lean cuisine. )
I do egg beaters (AGAIN with the gay!!!??) or use egg whites when cooking, what bread we have is whole grain, and most everything else has taken on a tinge of fat-freeness. (Including cheese, much to my cheese-lovin fiancee's chagrin. For the record, we get his and her cheeses now.) I steam, I grill, I broil (in lieu of frying), I don't eat much of the sweets (again, abhorrent to the fiancee- who makes Kemps Cow Tracks part of her nightly ritual), and cripes I've even taken to eating low-sodium turkey breast from the deli- plain. (W/a little spicy mustard.) And I even get my 5 servings of veggies daily. Usually plain.
And yes, co-workers, I count the calories and stay away from your Krispy Kreme Fridays. I've discovered the intrinsic joy of 'za with veggies in lieu of meat, (Record # 2; Luce' has some of the best vegetarian pizza's around- And I ain't no vegetarian), love me the Canyon Trail mix, and yes...yes: We even Juice.
And I do this every-single-day.
I've even turned the tables on the naysayers, the weekend athletes and fad-dieters- You know the ones. I give them right back the sneers and digs with my own underhanded commentary. Go on! Go on and Drink that Diet Coke with your cheesecake! They counteract each other, DaVinci! HERE's the latest: Reading a fellow blogger waxing poetic on her beef stew/beef gravy just grosses me OUT. BLEARGH! Or a few weeks ago, while sampling a chili recipe I said "Do you know what makes for good chili? Brown tofu in BBQ sauce." The person looked at me and laughed. You know the laugh? Where they stop laughing and get the "Oh, you aren't joking" face. Whatev. Atkins followers? Get some balance. You'll choke your brain.
While I do have my concession's to fame ( The occasional buffet's, Skinny mocha's, I'm a sucka fo' Cheesecake, seasoned french fries will twist my arm, and I appreciate really great cut of steak.) I'm now slowly cutting out the remaining naughty-naughties that once helped to balance my life (Caffeine, Carcinogens, andwine.) and progressing through my 30's with this crazy idea that the best way to stay healthy...is to eat less-eat healthier-and exercise. To those gross hypocrites who bitch about their weight while shovelling Hamburger Helper Hotdish in their mouth? Figure it out. It takes work (Not Hollywood 3 hour a day/6 day a week work w/a nutrionist..but, y'know- a little discipline.) And, it works for me anyway. Dear God, I weigh the same (less) now than I did 12 years ago in High School.
Now if you'll excuse me...I need to finish my barfy green tea.
If you've ever read what a bodybuilder or athlete's in training eat- that's me. Not the 3 to 5000 calories, but the type food: Plain. Plain water packed tuna, which illicit's the "Ewwww, what's that smell" response from my co-workers (Now I have to make stealth trips into the breakroom to open the can, get it ready, clean out the can, and hope that no one is the wiser. Still, it can't smell anyworse than their burned microwave popcorn or shitty lean cuisine. )
I do egg beaters (AGAIN with the gay!!!??) or use egg whites when cooking, what bread we have is whole grain, and most everything else has taken on a tinge of fat-freeness. (Including cheese, much to my cheese-lovin fiancee's chagrin. For the record, we get his and her cheeses now.) I steam, I grill, I broil (in lieu of frying), I don't eat much of the sweets (again, abhorrent to the fiancee- who makes Kemps Cow Tracks part of her nightly ritual), and cripes I've even taken to eating low-sodium turkey breast from the deli- plain. (W/a little spicy mustard.) And I even get my 5 servings of veggies daily. Usually plain.
And yes, co-workers, I count the calories and stay away from your Krispy Kreme Fridays. I've discovered the intrinsic joy of 'za with veggies in lieu of meat, (Record # 2; Luce' has some of the best vegetarian pizza's around- And I ain't no vegetarian), love me the Canyon Trail mix, and yes...yes: We even Juice.
And I do this every-single-day.
I've even turned the tables on the naysayers, the weekend athletes and fad-dieters- You know the ones. I give them right back the sneers and digs with my own underhanded commentary. Go on! Go on and Drink that Diet Coke with your cheesecake! They counteract each other, DaVinci! HERE's the latest: Reading a fellow blogger waxing poetic on her beef stew/beef gravy just grosses me OUT. BLEARGH! Or a few weeks ago, while sampling a chili recipe I said "Do you know what makes for good chili? Brown tofu in BBQ sauce." The person looked at me and laughed. You know the laugh? Where they stop laughing and get the "Oh, you aren't joking" face. Whatev. Atkins followers? Get some balance. You'll choke your brain.
While I do have my concession's to fame ( The occasional buffet's, Skinny mocha's, I'm a sucka fo' Cheesecake, seasoned french fries will twist my arm, and I appreciate really great cut of steak.) I'm now slowly cutting out the remaining naughty-naughties that once helped to balance my life (Caffeine, Carcinogens, and
Now if you'll excuse me...I need to finish my barfy green tea.
Monday, March 21, 2005
I was a bunny pirate.
At work. This Saturday. Sometimes, when it slows down...you just do shit like that.
"Yeargh. Avast, and shiver me timbers...This bun-bun be looking for a booty o' snack carrots. Yar!"
Yup. Shoulda went to business school. Hoooo...hoo. He gets weirder folks.
"Yeargh. Avast, and shiver me timbers...This bun-bun be looking for a booty o' snack carrots. Yar!"
Yup. Shoulda went to business school. Hoooo...hoo. He gets weirder folks.
Sunday, March 20, 2005
Metrosexual Justifications
"You are the GAYEST straight man I've ever met..." said my old buddy Dave S. as we were out for the geef's bachelor party last summer. His comment was born from the fact that, while my comrades were all slinging back brews and thingytails...I was knocking back a 2002 Pinot Grigio. In my khaki's. I get that sometimes, I assumed it was due to being clean cut, wearing pressed pants, drinking wine, unassuming, hammy but harmless, didn't date much as a kid/teen ("Do you know what Zero plus Zero equals??? FAAAG!"- Seriously, If you guys haven't ever enjoyed the comedy of "Kids in the Hall", you're missing out.)
There is the narcisstic streak (read: Dysmorphia) and I fret and fume about my chubs, eat healthy. I also happen to enjoy musical theatre, and I'm not a huge fan of sports or beer (I love attending the games, mind you- and that's my beer drinking time! I will not attend a Twinks/Vikes/Saints/Wild/T'wolves event unless I can have my pre-requisite beer and hot dog...waitaminute! Even THAT sounded gay!!)
I like labels, good cologne, classical music, I "groom", watch my posturing..etc I've had the rows w/less understanding ex's regarding qualities which they deemed "less than masculine" (Granted, this was an argument where, in the interest of being mean to me, the ex told me my acting was...'kinda gay'.) Even my big brother liked to fling out passive aggressive comments about my orientation in order to belittle me. (He's over it now, kids. I just told him he sounds like a moron and he doesn't believe that anyway.)
And here is a funny little Vegas story- Some drunk dude at Caesars looks at me and sez:
Life, my little porkchop. Get one.
I think when you strip down to the fundamentals (OMG, even THAT sounded Gay!!!) I've never really been too hung up on the label or caring what folks think. People that rail against gay marriage, and "Mo-ness" in general need to fix themselves a nice bowl of roughage and pour themselves a glass of "relax". Truth is I'm a lazy-ass, and being more open-minded and understanding sure beats holding a grudge or judging. Or "Grudging". Shitty movie.
So, yeah. Who cares, really. I'm off to the liquor store to pick up some more wine. Then to the gym. Then to shop for some new Gap Jeans. Why? 'Cause I can kick better in them, that's why.
Words of wisdom from P's dad: "Metrosexual, New Age Male, Sensitive Guy, Bunny Frou-Frou...they are all the same damn thing"
There is the narcisstic streak (read: Dysmorphia) and I fret and fume about my chubs, eat healthy. I also happen to enjoy musical theatre, and I'm not a huge fan of sports or beer (I love attending the games, mind you- and that's my beer drinking time! I will not attend a Twinks/Vikes/Saints/Wild/T'wolves event unless I can have my pre-requisite beer and hot dog...waitaminute! Even THAT sounded gay!!)
I like labels, good cologne, classical music, I "groom", watch my posturing..etc I've had the rows w/less understanding ex's regarding qualities which they deemed "less than masculine" (Granted, this was an argument where, in the interest of being mean to me, the ex told me my acting was...'kinda gay'.) Even my big brother liked to fling out passive aggressive comments about my orientation in order to belittle me. (He's over it now, kids. I just told him he sounds like a moron and he doesn't believe that anyway.)
And here is a funny little Vegas story- Some drunk dude at Caesars looks at me and sez:
- "Hey Man..I luhh..like yer shurt..."
- (me) "Thanks".
- "Dood! I not fuckin' gay, aiiight?"
Life, my little porkchop. Get one.
I think when you strip down to the fundamentals (OMG, even THAT sounded Gay!!!) I've never really been too hung up on the label or caring what folks think. People that rail against gay marriage, and "Mo-ness" in general need to fix themselves a nice bowl of roughage and pour themselves a glass of "relax". Truth is I'm a lazy-ass, and being more open-minded and understanding sure beats holding a grudge or judging. Or "Grudging". Shitty movie.
So, yeah. Who cares, really. I'm off to the liquor store to pick up some more wine. Then to the gym. Then to shop for some new Gap Jeans. Why? 'Cause I can kick better in them, that's why.
Words of wisdom from P's dad: "Metrosexual, New Age Male, Sensitive Guy, Bunny Frou-Frou...they are all the same damn thing"
Thursday, March 17, 2005
A naughty little story...
You know...you can learn a lot about patience when you've spent 24 years thinking about being naughty. See, I've got this weird, euphemistic, flirty, perv-o side that I've carried around for a better part of my life. I couldn't (read: didn't care to) explain it for a while until I discovered my "root". (Get it? : )
Since I wasn't one the kids who loved to play sports, I spent the better part of my childhood pursuing two past times:
(1) The pursuit of all things geeky, including playing make-believe super hero, reading, comics,
and spending an exceptional amount of time in my head.
This is where we come to past time # 2
(2) Imagining what the 1st time I have sex is going to be like.
At age 4, whilst snooping in my folks room one X-mas, my big brother and I happened upon "the stash". And though we both pretended like we weren't interested, you're damn right we snuck right back into find the smut when our folks weren't around. And like a good nerd, I didn't make these quick visits to spanky town...no no no! I would casually sneak them back to my room and read'em. Front to back. And while in the early years I mostly used to enjoy the dirty comics - it was after I turned all of 10 that I started to read stories. Stories by people I had never heard of: Norman Mailer, Truman Capote, Ron Kovic, Buck Henry. I read the 1st transcript short story of "First Blood", I found an article by one of my favorite's Issac Asimov (Time Travel and Dinosaurs! In a nudie mag?) the stories were great! Except, yeah, there were some boobs. And the forum letters.
After reading the self-help sections, the "How-To" articles (Graftenberg? Gesundheit!!!) I grew more and more curious, and anxiously awaited the first time I would get try these wonderful things. (And heck, the couples in the pictures seemed to be having fun.) Mom and Dad must have caught on to my traipsings into the "stash" as they attempted several times to move it around. I ended up receiving the birds and the bee's talk at age 10 while she tested for her RN degree. (All those Anatomy books lying around, it was bound to happen).
And yet, I fumbled. 7th grade rolls around, and I'm still sporting the baby fat. I watched other guys hook up, the "beautiful ones". I left dances and skate parties depressed, while others clicked braces to "Open Arms". Fuck, man, that dude over there is in remedial MATH and HE's getting some. Oh well...at least I had the "stash".
So, I worked my dirty jokes, and being the funny guy. I figured I'd never impress the ladies with my extensive knowledge of Doctor Who...so I managed to work on my charm school (And mom was an old Southern Belle, so flirting was kinda easy. And watching the way my old man listens to every-single-word you say...) I started exercising, figuring since I wasn't the hottest chalk on the block, I might was well be in shape. Practice Practice Practice...but with nary an outlet! Until High School.
Yes! Joy! Rapture! Finally! I get a gurlyfriend, the moment will commence!!! We have stated our intent, we even picked a DAY! I've read about this moment for so many years...Thanks, Secret Stash, and thanks mom for the condoms you got me last X-mas. The bra goes buh-bye with a deft, one handed flick...clothes are lost, Houston- we're cleared and ready annnnnd.... nobody said there would be crying. (Insert sound of slide whistle going doooowwn.) And no one said I would stay with her for the next 3 years. Yeesh. I went from being Ferris, to being Cameron. And she cheated on me 5 times!
I pondered this the other day, when J was in the bath and I walked by asking "do you need me to wash your back???" ("No")..."Oh. Do you want me to wash your front?"
Ah cha cha cha...I've got all new old cheap moves to try on you baby!
Since I wasn't one the kids who loved to play sports, I spent the better part of my childhood pursuing two past times:
(1) The pursuit of all things geeky, including playing make-believe super hero, reading, comics,
and spending an exceptional amount of time in my head.
This is where we come to past time # 2
(2) Imagining what the 1st time I have sex is going to be like.
At age 4, whilst snooping in my folks room one X-mas, my big brother and I happened upon "the stash". And though we both pretended like we weren't interested, you're damn right we snuck right back into find the smut when our folks weren't around. And like a good nerd, I didn't make these quick visits to spanky town...no no no! I would casually sneak them back to my room and read'em. Front to back. And while in the early years I mostly used to enjoy the dirty comics - it was after I turned all of 10 that I started to read stories. Stories by people I had never heard of: Norman Mailer, Truman Capote, Ron Kovic, Buck Henry. I read the 1st transcript short story of "First Blood", I found an article by one of my favorite's Issac Asimov (Time Travel and Dinosaurs! In a nudie mag?) the stories were great! Except, yeah, there were some boobs. And the forum letters.
After reading the self-help sections, the "How-To" articles (Graftenberg? Gesundheit!!!) I grew more and more curious, and anxiously awaited the first time I would get try these wonderful things. (And heck, the couples in the pictures seemed to be having fun.) Mom and Dad must have caught on to my traipsings into the "stash" as they attempted several times to move it around. I ended up receiving the birds and the bee's talk at age 10 while she tested for her RN degree. (All those Anatomy books lying around, it was bound to happen).
And yet, I fumbled. 7th grade rolls around, and I'm still sporting the baby fat. I watched other guys hook up, the "beautiful ones". I left dances and skate parties depressed, while others clicked braces to "Open Arms". Fuck, man, that dude over there is in remedial MATH and HE's getting some. Oh well...at least I had the "stash".
So, I worked my dirty jokes, and being the funny guy. I figured I'd never impress the ladies with my extensive knowledge of Doctor Who...so I managed to work on my charm school (And mom was an old Southern Belle, so flirting was kinda easy. And watching the way my old man listens to every-single-word you say...) I started exercising, figuring since I wasn't the hottest chalk on the block, I might was well be in shape. Practice Practice Practice...but with nary an outlet! Until High School.
Yes! Joy! Rapture! Finally! I get a gurlyfriend, the moment will commence!!! We have stated our intent, we even picked a DAY! I've read about this moment for so many years...Thanks, Secret Stash, and thanks mom for the condoms you got me last X-mas. The bra goes buh-bye with a deft, one handed flick...clothes are lost, Houston- we're cleared and ready annnnnd.... nobody said there would be crying. (Insert sound of slide whistle going doooowwn.) And no one said I would stay with her for the next 3 years. Yeesh. I went from being Ferris, to being Cameron. And she cheated on me 5 times!
I pondered this the other day, when J was in the bath and I walked by asking "do you need me to wash your back???" ("No")..."Oh. Do you want me to wash your front?"
Ah cha cha cha...I've got all new old cheap moves to try on you baby!
Lang mai yer lum reek! (*)
(*) Long may your chimney smoke.
It's the only gaelic I've got.
Happy Saint Paddy's everybody. I'm approximately 1/8 Irish, and I'll be damned if I own anything that's green. (Scratch that- I've got some Summer-y Shirts and a green Hart Schaffer Marks double breasted suit...but I'll be fooked if I'm wearing that shite to work, y'all.)
I opted for a blue shirt...with khaki's. 'Cause see, first you get the khaki's- then you get the chicks.
For all parties interested- From the P Family Tree:
James Love immigrated to America in the late 19th Century. He hails from Ullster province in County Fermaugh, Ireland. Upon reaching America, he married a young English woman w/the surname: Saxon.
Okay, so my late g-ma's last name was Saxon, and she married an Ulrich, but- there you are. Funny that the Irish surname was "Love", yes? My Irishness.
Czech, German, English, Scottish, Irish. Damn. Could I get any uglier genetics? Dammidy Damn, I think I'll go eat a sheep stomach stuffed w/intestine and barley now.
It's the only gaelic I've got.
Happy Saint Paddy's everybody. I'm approximately 1/8 Irish, and I'll be damned if I own anything that's green. (Scratch that- I've got some Summer-y Shirts and a green Hart Schaffer Marks double breasted suit...but I'll be fooked if I'm wearing that shite to work, y'all.)
I opted for a blue shirt...with khaki's. 'Cause see, first you get the khaki's- then you get the chicks.
For all parties interested- From the P Family Tree:
James Love immigrated to America in the late 19th Century. He hails from Ullster province in County Fermaugh, Ireland. Upon reaching America, he married a young English woman w/the surname: Saxon.
Okay, so my late g-ma's last name was Saxon, and she married an Ulrich, but- there you are. Funny that the Irish surname was "Love", yes? My Irishness.
Czech, German, English, Scottish, Irish. Damn. Could I get any uglier genetics? Dammidy Damn, I think I'll go eat a sheep stomach stuffed w/intestine and barley now.
Wednesday, March 16, 2005
Ha' Wed' (*)
(*) "Happy Wednesday"
So being in a show where I have a bacchanalian amount of time to kill, I'm able to indulge in a beloved hobby: (No...not spankin' it) Reading. I blasted through 3 books over the 3 week run, Intensity (By Dean Koontz), Shadowlands ('bout gene splicing and mutant kids), and last but not least...The DaVinci Code. (finally) If I'm really engaged in a novel most everything else will melt away, and I won't put the dumb thing down until I'm finished. (Yes, Yes...I am that cliche') And the DaVinci code was no exception. Yeah, I know it's gonna be a movie- But I gotta give Dan Brown credit...he packaged himself a nice little book. (It helps that I like Grail and religious mythology too. Shit, when I was in high school on my "Career Placement" test I stated my interests included "religion", "mythology", "TV", and "Public Speaking"...so my results told me that I should be a televangelist. MmWAH HA HA HA HA!!!)
That being said, articles like this infuriate me, and also make me a little sad at how narrow-minded people can be. I love how they say b"Don't buy, Don't Read". Nice message.
Oh well. I'm on to the "Batman Handbook". Although in the "training" section it says nothing about studying martial arts.
This weekend, We'll be finishing the drywall with help from a contractor and with the help of J's dad, we can then start the plumbing. It sucks. It's expensive. And Geef and Weef...I understand being broke-ah-broke too. (sighs) When your pipes "Gronk like a Wookie" whenever you turn them on, it's time to get it done.
J finally got her New Years pics developed. I wish I knew how to scan and upload them. She looks simply amazing.
So being in a show where I have a bacchanalian amount of time to kill, I'm able to indulge in a beloved hobby: (No...not spankin' it) Reading. I blasted through 3 books over the 3 week run, Intensity (By Dean Koontz), Shadowlands ('bout gene splicing and mutant kids), and last but not least...The DaVinci Code. (finally) If I'm really engaged in a novel most everything else will melt away, and I won't put the dumb thing down until I'm finished. (Yes, Yes...I am that cliche') And the DaVinci code was no exception. Yeah, I know it's gonna be a movie- But I gotta give Dan Brown credit...he packaged himself a nice little book. (It helps that I like Grail and religious mythology too. Shit, when I was in high school on my "Career Placement" test I stated my interests included "religion", "mythology", "TV", and "Public Speaking"...so my results told me that I should be a televangelist. MmWAH HA HA HA HA!!!)
That being said, articles like this infuriate me, and also make me a little sad at how narrow-minded people can be. I love how they say b"Don't buy, Don't Read". Nice message.
Oh well. I'm on to the "Batman Handbook". Although in the "training" section it says nothing about studying martial arts.
This weekend, We'll be finishing the drywall with help from a contractor and with the help of J's dad, we can then start the plumbing. It sucks. It's expensive. And Geef and Weef...I understand being broke-ah-broke too. (sighs) When your pipes "Gronk like a Wookie" whenever you turn them on, it's time to get it done.
J finally got her New Years pics developed. I wish I knew how to scan and upload them. She looks simply amazing.
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Geek with me...
I'll take all arguments and opinions in stride. This is frickin' cool.
I'm doing the midnight showing, as I have done 5 out of the 6 movies. (Star Wars was a birthday present for my big brother, July 13th '77. We stayed in the theatre and watched it twice.)
Ahhhhhh.
I'm doing the midnight showing, as I have done 5 out of the 6 movies. (Star Wars was a birthday present for my big brother, July 13th '77. We stayed in the theatre and watched it twice.)
Ahhhhhh.
Monday, March 14, 2005
Goodnight, Hazelhurst...
Well, that's done. "Crimes" closed on a good note, and having nice houses for the 3 weeks of the run really made it a great experience. Kaiser Roll and Dwin made a journey Westward on Friday night. Saturday was our closing party (Went to bed early again, per normal. Even after imbibing my weight in Pinot.) And Sunday we had an almost maximum capacity house...including my bud Ry-Gonn , his gf, and the Red-Hat Ladies. Ya gotta love the support. I got to raise my voice and give a shout out to the Barths. Their hospitality and generousity have been overwhelming.
I s'pose I should speak of what I did on my coveted "1st Saturday-DAY off". Not a fuck of a lot, actually. Exercised, put together this beeeyotch of a wooden file cabinet, and k-p'd around the house before leaving to Cloud City. Uneventful. Whatever. I'm old.
Guess what? Due to more house-shite, I have been forced to 86 yet another theatrical opportunity. (A new play reading* by this dude. ) Now, I haven't seen hide nor hair of him since Pie-Casso, but I hear tell that he's been prowling the seedy underbelly of Saint Cloud...looking for loose women and fast cash. fug. I really wanted to read that play. The man writes some funny shit.
*For the theatrically uninitiated- Playwrights will have people read their plays "out loud" in a Workshop setting. By listening to how the play sounds, new idea's can be bounced, characters cut/added, and it helps to shape out the play that will eventually be performed. The only painful theatrical experiences I have had from an audience standpoint have mostly been from sitting through shows that hadn't been workshopped. Which is usually the first question I ask the writer/producer when I see them after the show. Remember kids: There is much power in listening.
I s'pose I should speak of what I did on my coveted "1st Saturday-DAY off". Not a fuck of a lot, actually. Exercised, put together this beeeyotch of a wooden file cabinet, and k-p'd around the house before leaving to Cloud City. Uneventful. Whatever. I'm old.
Guess what? Due to more house-shite, I have been forced to 86 yet another theatrical opportunity. (A new play reading* by this dude. ) Now, I haven't seen hide nor hair of him since Pie-Casso, but I hear tell that he's been prowling the seedy underbelly of Saint Cloud...looking for loose women and fast cash. fug. I really wanted to read that play. The man writes some funny shit.
*For the theatrically uninitiated- Playwrights will have people read their plays "out loud" in a Workshop setting. By listening to how the play sounds, new idea's can be bounced, characters cut/added, and it helps to shape out the play that will eventually be performed. The only painful theatrical experiences I have had from an audience standpoint have mostly been from sitting through shows that hadn't been workshopped. Which is usually the first question I ask the writer/producer when I see them after the show. Remember kids: There is much power in listening.
Friday, March 11, 2005
Cat persons
Noise
The 80's station must have some fruity rule where they have to play Van Halen's "How do I know when it's love" at least 3 times in the daily rotation. Hellooo? There were more than 2 songs played between 1980 and 1989!!! And cripes, they actually slipped "Love of a Lifetime" ('92) in there for good measure. (Blaine HS Prom theme. Lord, I had a Wonderful time at that one.) They did play "Rocket" by Deef Leepard which, for the life of me, I can't understand the words. Most folks that know me also know of my penchant for seriously fucking up song lyrics or adding my own. And if it annoys you, sorry but really don't try and correct me. I won't remember it anyway, and I'll still wind up sounding like "Nell".
"Rocket!!! YEAH-ah! Saymonahmahnaaahhhh! Git-TAR! Drums!" WTF? What were you thinking when you wrote that?
"Rocket!!! YEAH-ah! Saymonahmahnaaahhhh! Git-TAR! Drums!" WTF? What were you thinking when you wrote that?
One more "Crime"
One last weekend up in Cloud City. Ahhhhh the memories. Ahhhhh..the commute. Ahhhhh....uhmmmm. That's all I got.
Except that I have Saturday, Day, off. I haven't had a Saturday, Day, off in over 4 months.
I'm gonna sleeeeep. I'm gonna hit the gym...(In Minneapolis) and the Do to the Jizz-o. That sounded vaguely euphemistic.
AndAndAnd! Finish the fracking Frack Drywall.
Folks. I would be a greater schmuck than I already am without pointing out that my friend, the Geef, has parted ways with an exceptional amount of weight. That good news will carry me through the weekend. Right, fucking, on!!!!
Except that I have Saturday, Day, off. I haven't had a Saturday, Day, off in over 4 months.
I'm gonna sleeeeep. I'm gonna hit the gym...(In Minneapolis) and the Do to the Jizz-o. That sounded vaguely euphemistic.
AndAndAnd! Finish the fracking Frack Drywall.
Folks. I would be a greater schmuck than I already am without pointing out that my friend, the Geef, has parted ways with an exceptional amount of weight. That good news will carry me through the weekend. Right, fucking, on!!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)