Happy Halloween Kiddies!!!

Now, if only the dorks on the elevator wouldn't eat their onion sammies on the 'vator, I'd be having a splendid effing day.

Y'know. For years my family put out a YUGE HWeen extravaganza. Cemetery in the front yard, spooky music, a hanging dead body in the tree, garage gussied up like a mad scientist's lab..We went crazy! My favorite time of year, (Except for my birthday...you know? Christmas?) This year it just doesn't feel the same. I've thought of some reasons:

1987-1 am, Some kids pulled down Mr.Hangy Dead guy from our front yard and set it ablaze in our cul-de-sac (Later that year, I'm nearly arrested for dressing up like a werewolf and pretending to "Kill" my big brother in front of the neighbor kids. Mom was non-plussed. My makeup looked cool, I must say.)
1994- I was in college, but still came home to "Play Halloween". Some kids stole our display mannequins. (And they were nice ones too: Freddy, Jason, Mike Meyers...yeah. Welcome to my hometown.)
1997- I was dumped, and then went to a halloween party that she was at to "win her back"..she hooked up w/a dude in front of me just to get me to leave. I was wearing a kilt and wound up sharking the party because this frat dude lifted it up for the world to see. I am a true Scotsman.
2001- An ex and I were planning our Hween and went costume shopping. She wanted to go as "bo peep" and have me dress like the sheep. "No!"...said I! Dead Silence and disappointment radiated from she...
2002- J and I, fresh into dating, went to a h'ween party at my big brothers house. She was a sexy fairy. Some drunk-aced douchebag made for a very uncomfortable night. (Made some really jerky comments)

This year, mom and dad are going to IA to help finish up some categorizing of G-ma's old stuff. i.e. Who get's what, now that she's gone. A sad side of a relative passing away, but it has to happen. : (

Ghost Tours- Can really suck the life outta ya.

AND "J" works at night, and so this will really be the 2nd year I will not have done anything for Halloween. Drink, Party, Whoop it up. I don't even have candy at home. We haven't even got a pumpkin. I mean, I work at a costume shop so when you see the dregs come into your store to buy stuff, it takes some of the flavor outta ya'. And with the pending nuptials, home buying on the brain, we've been really focusing on 1 thing atta time. And plus, I haven't heard of any big parties. Costume parties. The crazy kind.

I tell ya, If we get this house, I'm throwing costume parties regularly. Theme parties. Pajama Jammy Jams, "End of the World Parties", Costume parties in Summer (So the really freaky costumes can be worn) Mardi Gras dress up parties w/the cool half masks, wear a sports Jersey parties...

Happy Halloween All! Stay safe, and some of you peeps I may very well see at the market. I may even be ambitious enough to post over the weekend. Lord knows I'm never at a loss for s#it to say.

Thanks for the costume idea, Portland. (I need all the help I can get)
I'm suprised that Raven and G haven't updated their blogs...this is, after all, Halloween!

Back online!

Praises be! My big brother came through and finally fixed up our PC! Turns out that the whole hard drive was corrupted by AO-Hell, which caused viruses aplenty. No more trips to the Library for us, we can discretely peruse por...I mean quality educational websites from the privacy of our own home.

I hated checking my email at the library. Hate it because I loathe waiting around. And this whole "broken PC" debacle has tested my mettle in terms of how long I can wait at the reference desk for the 1st available PC....(5 minutes was my record before I ran out the door btw. )

Tonight I thought I was going to be going to class, working out, and reading. (I just picked up my copy of "Henry V" along with a songbook of Sinatra covers) However. this changed when it was discovered that I will be going to the "gypsy" of Anything Goes tonight. (sigh) What I do for love. : )

Shuf-FULL, step, Shuf-FULL, step, Fuh-lap, ball change

My brain is racing too hard today. I'm heading for an aneurysm...I'm almost certain.
Sweet baby is tech-ing her show this week. She'll be gone 'til 11pm most nights (With 2 nights until midnight) which means...I'll be asleep when she returns. Except for last night. Back to back episodes of "X-Files". You know, the 2-parter with the lepers, and the train, and the old police chief from "21 Jump Street"? (I know he's "X", but it's more fun to say it that way.) See- after work yesterday, I had a nap, karate, the Y for some more self-abuse, then home to bed...and just couldn't sleep.
So kitty and I were wide awake. (Because of the dang nap.)

I miss having my PC . Noooo Internet. No cure for Insomnia. No websites that rhyme with "corn". : )

When I fed our cat last night, I had one of those stupid "dammit" kinda things happen- The ring broke off on the cat food can. Meaning It was gonna be a pain in the keister to open. Since the can opener only succeeded in denting it, I thought I'd just puncture the top w/a screwdriver, and pry it off. Well, it got punctured, and I coated my forearms and hands with Friskies Salmon Feast. At least it didn't get on the floor.

Today's title is related to tap lessons I had dozens of years ago. The "J" is teaching me tap right now for potential future work opportunities (i.e in case the Chan needs a swing) so, I asked her to teach me. Okay??? Is that all right with you???

I tried tap a while back in my freshmen movement class. The instructor sounded an awful lot like Myrtle The Turtle when she talked. ("Here we goooo. Shuf-FULL, step, Shuf-FULL, step, Shuf-FULL ball change, Shuf-FULL step." All at about 4 RPM's.)

I feel dumb when I do it, and when I see myself in the mirror doing it. I'd rather be sidekicking. J is extremely patient with me. She does teach kids, y'know.

Karate lesson for everyone: The Sidekick.
It's just like if you are crushing an aluminum can on the ground (A Stomp) Except, your leg will go perpindicular from your body.
1) Raise your knee up like you're gonna step on the can (Go on, try it)
2) Pivot your foot and leg OUT (the one your standing on) while bringing the raised knee across your body.
3) Extend it out slowly, like your stomping on a can. (Don't point your feet. Keep your toes back and stomp with your heel. Start low, and as your flexibility improves so will the height of your leg. You should look like you're standing up, with one leg sticking out to the side (or towards the ground) Ideally, you'd be looking in the direction your kicking.

Karaoke and Me....

I was asked why I don't hit Le Market for karate-okey on Wed/Sun nights(Except for my "bi-annual" visits)

Okey Doke...here it is: I dj'ed karaoke for 2 years. It's true. It was a moment of weakness in college (an ex was doing it, so I though I'd do it too, so that we would end work at the same time and all that) it was $50 a night, or $75 if it was in St. Bonifacious or Waverly. I dj'ed in some of the less reputable establishments in the TC metro. (The kind with fence material around the bar and the karaoke booth) And when your repetoire heads towards Chris Issak, Elton John, Billy Joel, and Showtunes...well, you just can't please everyone.

Which brings me to the sensitive issue of the types of singers. Not good. A few pieces of cubic zirconia in the rough...but generally bad. Real bad. Towards the end of that career, I had to start all of my shows with a shot of something and a beer. Just to get through. I received one complaint during my tenure. I didn't sing "Proud to be an American" at this VFW in Bloomington. (Its too high a range for me. It would've sounded terrible) It was the end of the night, I was shutting things down when I get this drunk-ace lady telling me to sing or I'd lose customers. I actually laughed at her. I get a call the next morning from the toothless wonder who was my boss that I had a complaint. I didn't bother to respond. She said "Hello???" I said "I think I'm gonna resign...thanks" (I forgot to mention the 64 year old bartender who wanted me to call her "Mother" and that my cologne made her "wet"...yeah. BarfBarfBAAAARF!!!!!)

After I had quit, I was in this musical at the 90's, so after rehearsal I'd hit karaoke downstairs with the cast. There was the tickets, and the books, and the numbers, and the waiting, and the favorites, and trying to write your request after 3 vodka martini's and being CONVINCED that you can just KILL the song "Dust in the Wind"...well, my love for the okey faded from my heart. It just sorta lost it's appeal.

And...I can't sing very well. Did I mention that too?

So, comraderie aside (Because in prior blogs you know I love my teatro' peeps) , I have a different view these days of what makes for a fun night. I really like the scant few evenings that J and I spend together when we both aren't working one of our 17 jobs, and we just hang out together and watch "MXC Challenge" on Spike. And since I'm usually on the low side of a checking balance, racking up a $20 bar tab w/o thinking is somewhat of a luxury for me nowadays. (Boo-Hoo...me and everyone else, right?) Well, There is the whole house and marriage thing. I'm in over my head folks. I won't lie.

But stop over at my place. I'm a heckuva host.

QUICK, WTF SHOULD I BE FOR HALLOWE'EEN!!!! (I Work at a costume shop, and I'm stumped)

Drunk on Carbs

Wow. This weekend gave me the same feeling as a prison furlough. It was the fiancee's last few evenings off before she starts her 6 month stint in Anything Goes. (Effectively hamstringing any evening activities that could occur before 10pm) We went through this last season with "Cats", and at least with "AG" it won't beat the crap outta her body.

Anyhooo, she had rehearsal, I worked. (Granted, I was sent home early on Saturday due to the costume store being "overstaffed"...not that you could tell. There were literally 50 people crammed into this itty bitty costume store.) That evening, I did 3 tours for the caves, which got me back home by 2am. And the sweet baby was waiting up for me to say goodnight. Sunday, J gave me some tap lessons, and I traded by showing her some Aikido. (Serve the Pie) raked like a fiend, saw vikes goodness with friends...and J and I decided to make use of a gift card some of her former students gave her. (For Tucci Bennuch) I gorged on the pasta w/procini mushrooms whilst she favored the chicken marsala. Regardless, we both felt like Keiko the whale afterwards. Off to the movie store for "May" and then bed. See, my life is one of constant intrigue and conspiracy....: )I still feel full btw. I wish I coulda made it to 'fu.


("May" sucked. Not a horror movie, per se, rather a "Gore-or" movie. I guess I had expected something else.)

So, gift cards. I think that they are brilliant. We're sitting on a stack at home right now (J seems to get bath and body gc's after every dance recital she teaches for. Needless to say, she get's kinda bored with them. ) I have $25 for Shinders (I know what I'm getting, it's just finding the time to drag my sorry butt over there) The rest of them have tiny balances on them (Oh no, they can't give you $1.35 CASH, we're just gonna leave it on that card to make you come back in and buy some s##t. Frickin JCPenny...f##kers.) Lastly, the one that has been sitting in my possession the longest: Abercrombie and Fitch.

Quick side: I was heading to Rosedale years ago with my buddy Ssssteve and a crazy-ex. During the car ride, she said that she wanted to go into Abercrombie and FINCH. I...(very, politely), corrected her...with not a shade of condescension entering my voice, (Lest she grow angered, and then turn green, and "Hulk Out", effectively destroying my '88 Corsica.) she disagreed with me...and disagreed a couple of more times. Each time, increasing the amount of condescension in HER voice. Yeah. Back then, I told her every day that I'd love her forever. Ahhhhh to be 20 again.

Soooo, we walked into the mall, silently, and as we closed in the store Steve-a-Rino points to the sign and sez:
"See, T______??? It says FITCH..You know? Like BITCH!!!!"
I've never laughed that hard...on the inside.


Anyway...I'm sitting on this gc, and for the life of me, I've been in the store 3 different times at 3 different malls, and I have yet to find anything to wear. I should just chuck it. Maybe get some cologne. It just all looks kinda like little kid clothes,
Y'know? Or, it's all been distressed in that new "Hey, we're bringing back that Def Leppard Destroyed Jean Look...except subtle..." Yeah. WTF do I buy at the Fitch, folks? Help me out, or I swear somebody is gonna get that dumb little piece of plastic.
Maybe this year for Hallowe'en I'll go as a Teenager. (Hell, I don't have a smeggin clue what I'm gonna be yet.) Help.

Still Livin' the Dream (A little long, skip if you are in a hurry)

A few months back, I was doing some birthday shopping at some electronic store when I ran into a young lady I went to college with. We exchanged hugs, asking the pre-requisite question: "Haven't seen you in a while, what have you been up to?"...well, You've all been there.


She said she's working full time schilling high-end electronic equipment and living with her man... I said that I was working at the Stag, and currently in a production of "_______" with "_______" company.... She looked at me, smiled, and said "Ohhh, still chasing the dream, huh???" I was a little perplexed, and replied "Chasing it? I'm actually kinda doing it." We continued awkwardly for a while, until I found my purchase, and skedaddled. (And in fairness, I should mention that she did hook me up with a phat employee discount.)

In college, she was a very good director, churning out a "Bent" and an "Equus" that had the faculty thinking that she'd be grad school bound. I'm guessing that her comment was born from the fact that she was a bitter Betty, who (Apparently) stopped directing to chase after her dude- losing grants and scholarships in the process. But really...

I put it out there: What is chasing the dream, exactly? My actor friends and artistically inclined posters: why are we doing what we're doing?

See, everything I've ever been told about me as an actor was contrary to my trying to be one. My acting prof said "You're more like a stand up comic than an actor...have you thought about stand-up classes?" My On-Camera teacher said "well, uhhhhhh ( reach, reach, reach) you have sort of an interesting look...Have you tried focusing on stage or community theatre?" (Thanks) I had a convo w/a friends dad who said "M_ _ _, Actors are like grains of sand in a bucket...you should be in sales, not trying to chase puss doing high school foolishness. Yeah, thank's "Dick" (His name)I'll remember that. So far, I think 10% of the folks from my college class are still gigging. The rest, who knows. Who really frickin cares

In college, I never thought I would be working in a corporate job. To be honest, I hadn't the foggiest as to what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. (Some days I still don't) I work. It's a job. Just like theatre. Show up, learn your lines, do your blocking. It ain't some dodge, hustle, or way to stay partying like I'm still in High School. As for the "puss-chasing" as Dick so eloquently put it...Well, I did meet my future wife in a show. Really beside the point though.

My point is, I really couldn't tell you why I stayed in it. Except to say that I truly, dearly love my small theatre "co-workers". They are almost like family...(Ug, I'll do the whole "sharing triumph" cliche right here) I love hearing about how someone landed those coveted Jungle, Illustion, Hassler, or Park Square gig. Many (not all) but many of us share that joy with them, we congratulate them and sometimes deep down we wish it could be us too. (And some of those co-workers even get to grace the stage at the flying "G")
And with some of those co-workers sometimes I have moments with them on stage that are indescribable. Or when you see a show, and there's a moment on stage that just makes you go.."wow" (Ask me about "The Real Thing" at TRP in '97 sometime. It almost took the wind out of me.)

Yup: Performing and Karate. 2 things that I just have to do and they make me feel good. I've made this day job work for me. I've even changed my attitude on the night job. It's the same cliche', and I hate cliche's that it's all really what you make it.

Oh, and being with Julio. I think I'm pretty darn good at that too.
Good weekend folks. Tell me about yours. I work my second and 3rd jobs. Poppa gotta pay the bills. Y'know?
G- Nice Persian. And nice follow up message. Very honorable. I'll tell you my humane society persian story sometime if I remember.
Jabs- Your 2 cents are appreciated. I like the different train of thought
Kilby- You eat saddlebags. Go on my tour

All over the place....

A real blog instead of a responsey one:

My explanation of the last title is a result of some more changes which are coming over my Karate school. See, 30 or so years ago, most karate schools didn't use any hand or foot pads...or athletic supporters. One of our Grandmaster's (Who received his black belt from MR. Chuck Norris, Thankyouverymuch.) Well, he recalls the days when you were teased for wearing protective gear.

Jhoon Rhee, one of the founders of American Tae Kwon Do (My school) aka "American Sport Karate", came up with a brilliant idea when he came to the US in the 60's to chase the American Dream and open up a chain of dojang's. Boxing gloves had already been around, so why not hand AND foot pads. Take the fear out of getting yer butt kicked and make it a little safer. While he was at it, he thought up a lightweight and protective head gear. Jhoon worked out the kinks by sparring with Bruce Lee...in addition to opening up his 1st school in San Fran. (Where Bruce introduce Jeet Kune Do. I couldn't find either school when I visited last August)

Last fall, I found out that if you spar, you have to have a face shield in addition to headgear, or they won't let you fight. A hockey helmet, basically. $60 to $100 investment, on top over your school dues, graduation fees, and tournaments.

Truth is, I understand the safety aspect (There are a couple of douchebags who don't have the best control) nor do I swim so deep in my own machismo that I think that face shields are for pu##ies....(Although they do obstruct your peripheral vision and cause you to drop your head slightly...And if you have a plexi shield, it can sometimes fog up.)

No, that all doesn't bug me. I don't like my face, but I'd like it a lot less if my jaw is broken. I also like my junk. I do not wish it to be crushed by a wayward kick (This means you McArdle)

No. The reason I'm tourqued is that now, after we bow into class, the instructor no longer shouts "Fighting STANCE" causing the students to, you know, go into fighting stances....Rather they now have to shout "GUARD POSITION". Apparently this has to do with us moving towards a kinder and gentler martial arts school.

Yeah.

Guard Position vs. Fighting Stance

1st) Kaiser: Someone told me that there was a big football hullaballoo that someone did at some park...when is that ever gonna happen again.
2nd) G- There has to be time somewhere for wasted youth activity. Sometime. Fricking Gameworks to play games, or something. The one thing about ZCurts bachelor party was that we didn't stick around to play air hockey. I need to play air hockey. Neeeeeeeddddd!!!!!! (Happy anniversary btw. My big bro and his wife had their's on 10/3. It was during G-ma's funeral, but...yeah. 1 year for them)

3rd)Portland- Thanks for your sympathy. (regarding the home) I played volleyball too, but I had to quit when they switched the regulation uniforms to bikini bottoms. Saddlebags and all that nastiness, you know. : )


And just a comment that I remembered from my "Electronic Business Writing" class.
"Ultimately, Electronic Mail is not the best way to convey feelings, or communicate serious matters." So, yeah. GI Joe and Cobra you guys. Whew. My big brother and I did that once. It was ugly. I may blog about that some day too.

HIIIII- Keeba!!!!

Tournament Season at USA Karate schools is underway. Oct. 31st is the NCKA's (North Central Karate Association) Northern States Open. I'm really not one for tourney's to begin with, and even though I'm chomping at the bit to whoop it up, I won't be in "fighting shape" by then. (Read: I'm still too chubbly bubbly) I might volunteer to judge/scorekeep if I can. (Which means: I probably won't have time to go.) I've been sitting on the same belt for too long though, so it's more important I attend a majority of regular classes, and fewer sparring classes.

I don't do tourneys because they suck. I was DQ'ed from 2 out of the 3 I've fought in, and to be fair, the judging wasn't all that great. One of the tourney's I was disqualified from, my opponenet kicked me in the gonads. Hard. Cup or not, it made my head swim. (My last thought before I bent over was that I didn't wanna barf. Then I saw my big brother bounding down the bleachers with death in his eyes, and I had to smile.)

I got up again, we clashed, and I socked him in the face. Illegally. Big Bro said it was justified, which is fine by me.

And why've I been sitting on my belt so long? Drama. No, seriously, I mean I've been working pretty consistently since '98 in all sorts of shows, so when you rehearse both at night and weekends, it impinges a little on your capability to train. So, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Any of my fellow friends reading this (At this point I'm gonna say Portland, G, Kaiser, and the Alaskan Queen of Beauty) have you all had a pasttime that you had to ki-bosh due to something else getting in the way?

ps: To the Oregonian Runner. 2 houses? I'm thinking that every ounce of that "marathon endurance" would be needed to get through that.
pps: Kaiser...I've been without a home PC for over 2 weeks. It's killing both J and I to not have 'net access. My bro is fixing it right now, but if he says it's fried, we're effed, 'cause we can't afford a PC at this delicate point in our home-buying lives.

Here's an Ikea...

What an effed up store. Mom wanted the family to commisserate there for her birthday before we grabbed dinner. See, we'd never been, and it's been open so long that she wanted to check it out (presumably after the crowds and hubbub died down) And it is still an effed up store. Go to Ikea.com to see some of the tawdry wares they hawk. I'm not a huge fan of contemporary stylings or art deco, but I love mama-san and wanted to make her's a happy birthday.

They have a ball crawl in this big glass cage for the kids as you walk into the place. (With other scandanavian styled playground fare) As we were leaving, there were 2 kids taking turns throwing the balls at the glass. So I ran up to the glass and pretended to "dodge" the lil' balls while taunting the kids. (Yelling at them something to the effect of "C'MON..C'MON!!! IZZAT ALL YOU GOT?? MISSED ME...C'MOOOONN!!!!!") This caused the remainder of the kids in the play area (Roughly 10-14 other kids betwixt the ages of 4 and 9 methinks) to go bolting for the ball crawl, grab the first ball they could get their hands on, and start pelting the glass, trying to get at me. I've never seen that kind of display of pack mentality. I half expected Marlon Perkins and the "Wild Kingdom" film crew to come out and provide commentary.

I was pulled away by my fiancee' and embarrassed family (Granted, big brother was laughing a bit) and the drowning sounds of hundreds of plastic wiffley balls hitting the fenster. Can you hear that sound? It was priceless.


We're getting even more grief trying to buy this house. The lender's are balking at the fact that J is a performer, therefore self-employed, therefore cannot provide 3 years of steady employment at a single employer. Even though she has never been unemployed since she was 15. Nice.

All of this home-buying rigamarole, couple with the loss of my granmother (And a certain costume shop, and G and G tours) has now resulted in my having to turn down a chance to be in a show. I'll put it this way: This here group of months hasn't been very kind to me, from an artistic standpoint. I am loathe to turn down work, since I really don't know if I'll ever work again tomorrow.

Be so kind, if you can, and see The Crucible and The Mudslinger Party (go to Gremlintheatre.org and Pigseyetheatre.org) . As well as any and all small theatre shows you can muster the time or finance's to see. These are great (and talented) people working hard for audiences. See their shows. Be entertained.

Ran into fellow Blodger Kaiser today. I hope you get the gig bro. I don't think I impressed them all that much. But when your brain moves in the wrong way, and you say a word that rhymes with "corn" in the context of a Satellite Cable Commercial...well, you know you didn't get the part.

Portland. You're naughty.

21 Grams of Crap

I don't mind movies that follow a disjointed narrative (ala' Memento) but I think that they can be executed perfectly (ala' Usual Suspects) or in a method that confuses and frustrates the viewer, such was my experience with 21 Grams.
Great performances, don't get me wrong- (Benecio, Naomi Watts, Penn....Helllooooo?) but to be up on IMDB's top 250 movies of all time lists? Well let's just say that it was no "Earnest Goes to Camp"...


Just like this last week, the weekend also went by way too quickly. In fact, it went so fast that I wonder if my evil twin doppelganger is off enjoying my weekend with my fiancee', leaving me to speed through it and recount the weird moments. Let's see:

After work Friday, I did 2 G&G tours. The first tour group was private, and the bus was stocked full of all Girl Scouts, age 10. That was actually the fun tour. (I was "mean scary guy" and they called my partner "nice funny guy"- Tough crowd) I was pre-empted several times when the girls noticed Limo's outside of the windows. (LIMO'S!!!! SQQUEEEEEL!!!!) and they were pretty easy to please in terms of being scared/grossed out= All I had to do was say "boys" ("EEEEWWWWWWW BBOOOOOYS!!!!) I didn't think they'd bite, but that was the old standby. The 2nd tour sucked. Our "critic" in the 3rd seat kept asking "Is this tour over yet???!!!" I ripped on her hard, which made her stfu...but it set the tone for the next 2 hours. 'Nuff Said.

Saturday was more 'Fu (A lot of Bo and Aikido concepts. Aikido is fun, except when you are being served pie and land on the floor. If that doesn't make much sense...I'd be happy to demonstrate ; ) I'll have another tirade regarding the newest nomenclature for a "Kinder, Gentler Dojo". Trust me, I may not even wait for tomorrow. This is He-UGE!!! To me anyway.
Hit the gym to jog, and get a shoulders/arm/leggy work out in. Rented "21 A$$ Grams" and promptly fell asleep.

Sunday was meeting with our agent to get the purchase agreement signed, and drive by the home. There's a "Sold" sign up on it. That's for us, btw. : )
Mom's birthday was last night. She wanted us all (Dad, bro, bro's wife, Julio, and yours truly) to check out IKEA. I'll rant on IKEA later. It was a trip. TGI Fridays for din-din, her presents, and cocktails and we called it a night.

And it was a nice night. I just couldn't believe I was up again at 5:45.

As for my new "posters": I'd like to shout out my appreciation to a new anonymous responder (who I happen to think is pretty crazy because she likes to run exorbitantly long distances.) Thank You for your condolences. I'm gonna G-ma Rose a lot.

And for the 2nd new poster, now dubbed "Portland"....Some dumb MF almost plowed into me on my way home from the studio this Saturday. Dude was on his cell phone. Prick. (BTW folks, Portland is also a little crazy due to her predilection for running exorbitantly long distances. I've got two marathoners here. The oxygen level on this sight just went up 25%.)

Later Masturbator

frickin' Thursday drivers....

Etiquette. Manners. Respectful Behavior.
I admit it. I am that guy on the road. Not a road rager, by any stretch of the imagination, but I am the driver my dad didn't want me to be. ( i.e. I drive like my dad) So, I've begun listening to MPR to calm me down a bit. It force's me to listen to news and other "blah diddy blah blah all things considered blah" and I can focus on driving and let go all of that shite driving that I witness.

Still...in case people forget in the years since drivers ed:
Use your f##king turn signal.
Look over your shoulder before changing lanes...(Oh no, I understand sir or ma'am- you OWN the road, right???)
The freeway entrance is not a slow down, you need to get up to speed...douchebags.
If you feel the pressing need to do the whole vindictive driving thing (Speed up to get ahead of you, then slow waaaaaaay the f##k down just to be a dick) Then I think public transportation is the way to go, my friends.
Don't signal 4 blocks prior to your turn.
Don't slow down for that green light.. really. It means go! Promise!
Buses- I respect and love all things public transportation. Although some (just some, my PT users) bus drivers really, really, really need to get a proctol to remove their heads, from their annussssssssess.
Precipitation+MN= Douchebags. "Oh....it's a little misty out...better put on the snow tires and drive 17 mph UNDER the speedlimit. I may very well spin out on 394." Seriously. People. I understand. And yet maybe I don't-understand.

...and for the love of pete, don't read, talk on your cell, put on make up, or drink/been drinking, while driving. It's bad. Look at those poor kids on the news. The guy that hit them? Drunk AND on the cell phone. Seriously, the convo can wait until you are whereever you need to be C#ckmaster. I know for a fact you aren't that important.

Yeah. That covers this mornings commute. SW Mpls to Plymouth. If we get this house, it'll be NE Mpls to Maple Swamp. at least I'll be driving away from rush hour in the morning and away from Rush hour when I come home.

I bet I still find some douchebaggedy drivers. THE PEDAL ON THE RIGHT WORKS!!!
AAAAASSSSSSHOOOOOOOOLLLLLLEEE!!!!!!!

How about you, gentle readers? Any topical driving commentary you'd like to add to this list? And I promise to blog a healthier blog. It was just a bad drive today.

I LOVE Chinese Food

Fresh Wok is the best. BEST Chinese take out. 46th and Nicollet in Minneapolis. Call them. Eat their food. No MSG's make all the difference. Last night was Chinese food night at the casa, so I ordered up a plate of the "usual" (Steamed Chicken and mixed veggies) while the fiancee' ordered the ole' standby of Sweet and Sour Chicken. It was heaven. And it beats paying the same price for smaller (tiny) portions at Chin's.

Cooking Chinese food at home just escapes me. The best dish I can usually throw together is brown rice, chicken, broccoli, pea pods, and some water chesnuts. Toss 'er all in a Wok with some Lawry's Teriyaki Marinade and there you go.

Anybody care to share an easy recipe or your favorite Chinese Take out and why? ( Not sit down, either. I'm talking FAST.) We're a chicken and fish home. So whatever you got.

Before passing out in blissful oblivion last night, Jule's stopped on that Bravo's "Next Male Model" show. I made the "ugh, change it" comment but she stayed on the show. So I slept. A Jealous, Sweaty, Stuffed-full-of-Chinese slumber. From what I could hear before drifting off, the dudes are continually asked to strip to their underpants by Carmen Electra. Ladies, The show is on Tuesday nights at 11pm on Bravo. Fella's, you can find me adding another 200 + crunches to my routine. Frickin' underpants models. Mimbo's.

House news: The mucky muck owners of the house Julio and I bid on came back with a counter counter offer. We could technically come back with a counter counter counter offer....or just chuck it and keep paying our astronomical rent.



I promise to try and keep future blogs shorter. Initial blog excitement and all.

I am working on improving my time management...

This post is really a broad disclaimer as to why I don't, or can't do the following: See more theatre, go to the bar, visit my folks, spend more time with old friends, see a midnight showing of a movie (S2 being the exception) make it to parties etcetera etcetera etcetera....


My "big kid" job is working for one of the larger insurance firms in the US. I coach the customer service reps on how to respond to Jane and John Public when they call in with questions about their life insurance. Not glamorous, but when you add in the "Quality reviewing" of 50 + peeps phone calls (At 5 to 10 calls per CSR per month) and that my scoring directly affect their raise next year...well it can get a little stressful. (I've discovered the word my boss likes to use with me is "accountable" me.) 45 + hours a week. My day starts at wake-up. 5:45 am.

The part time job is at a Tux rental/Costume shop which many of you know of. I really fell into it- I was picking up some make up for a show I was doing, and saw that they were hiring. The rest is history. 3 to 4 nights a week.

The seasonal job is doing ghost and graves tours. Not my favorite. 1 to 2 nights a week.

USA Karate. I gotta go, and I usually can't get in enough regular classes to really promote myself. 1 to 2 nights a week. I should go 3-4 times a week minimum.

The THEATRE!!!! Henry V is coming up. After that, I'll be back up in Saint Cloud in February/March. This is what cuts into my normal routine. Average anywhere from 4 to 7 shows a year. (2003 was a doozy.)

Gran was sick for a while. That's over now.

My sweet baby. She'll be starting "Anything Goes" the last weekend in Oct. That's gonna be 6 nights a week, 8 shows a week. It won't be as hard on her body as "Cats" was, but I'll miss seeing her nightly regardless. And we have a June wedding to plan. Which ties into Knights (I'm buying my ushers and best man's tux for them in lieu of a normal wedding gift. I'm gonna rent the ties and her daddy's tux for him. I get a discount, y'know?)

We're buying a house. Say goodbye to almost $200,000.00. The debt, will be ours and ours alone.

(Disclaimer, and please understand: I wouldn't trade any of this for the world. I love my fam, friends, and am constantly honored by the talent of the people I perform with, and the folks at the dojo who beat me to s**T and make it look easy. )

So, like the rest of the world, I'm busy. And I love sleep. And I don't get too many chances to get out and party on weekends, because I really love spending time with my girl. She's really cool, And I miss seeing her sometimes.

Ummmm, need to spend more time @ KAH-rate, and see more shows. Seriously.

And I'm getting fiz-at. Packing on the Elle- Bee-Esses. I'm looking like a pre-Jarrod. What do you all find makes the rest of you so busy? Let me know.

Goodbye Supes....

Well....I'm still trying to figure out how to attach links and write in a different frickin' font. Frustrating, yes. But not as frustrating as buying a house, or the 6 other people that get on the elevator with me and hit the 6 floors prior to mine. When I am already a little late. Joy.


News for today. Christopher Reeve passed away. Most peeps already already know the story of his life as well as his accident so I'd like to stay away from that for a second and focus on how Mr. Reeve and the Superman movies burned more pop culture Iconography and good morals into my impressionable little brain.

Star Wars had already been out for a year and had done its damage by turning myself and a generation of kids, teens, and adults into geeks. Since SW had re-defined Sci-Fi, Hollywood thought it was time for a Superhero Movie to swoop in (so to speak) and redefine live action comics. "Supes" was the movie, Donner the director, and Reeve was the Man of Steel. (And Typecasting aside, he was the quintessential Superdude.) Even as a little porkchop, I believed that I too stood for "Truth, Justice, and American Way" (Even though I was much more of a "Great Power comes Great Responsibility" kinda guy). PLUS: He saw Margot "I'm eating bugs now" Kidder's underpants AND got down in the cool underground pool with Miss Tessmacher. Lucky Dog. (At least my 4.5 year old brain thought he was lucky.)

While the movie itself didn't create the merchandising bonanza that Lucas made, it still had a lasting impact on how I viewed right and wrong.
And although, try as I might, to pretend to be the Pre-Schooler of Steel (Complete with blue underoo's and a red towel for a cape) I just didn't capture the same essence with my big mop of blonde curley hair. (It wasn't until William Katt and the Greatest American Hero that I found a superperson who I could do that.)

A few years later, I watched another C-Reeve movie "Somewhere in Time". The only thing I remembered from that movie was that it scared me, and made me sad at the same time. And that pennies from 1978 cause you to loose your mind in 1912. Weird.

A couple of months ago, I was called by my agent to audition for the new Singer directed Superman project. While I know that I really don't fit the demographic- ( I tried telling her "I'm really more of a Hal Jordan/Green Lantern type if we are sticking with the DC cannon of comics"....And c'mon. 5'10"/165 lbs???? Hardly the strapping presence of the Last Son of Krypton. Remind me sometime to tell y'all about my "Batman Forever" audition.)-I went on the audition anyway. How often do you get a chance to read for something like that anyway?

Soooo, I dressed in my most imposing double breasted suit, ate some Chinese Buffet to hopefully puff out my gaunt wee head, parted my hair on the side like a good Clark should....and wore my fake horn rimed glasses. I looked more like Lewis Skolnick from Revenge of the Nerds.

The sides they gave us were right from the movie. Really, it made me way too nostalgic to give it a believable reading. And some of the OTHER dude's that were there? Meatballs. Waaaaay wrong demographics were called out on that day. What can I say? We're not all Christopher Reeves.

I had really hoped that he would walk again. I thought, like a lot of other folks, that if anyone went from a quadrapalegic to a walker, it would be he. It'll be another Superperson who does it one day. Mr. Reeves just set the tone.

I'll miss you Kal-El.

Greetings!

Welcome to my first post. My sincerest apologies ahead of time if I fail to maintain this on at least a weekly basis. You see, I have the tendency to get side tracked so forgive me if I go astray. More posty goodness to follow.


Cheers!