Weight, Weight...don't tell me...

Or, "Confessions of a banana-rexic"...Full disclaimer friends- This week, the old blog is going to be almost solely dedicated to running shit. The Mpls. Half-Marathon is coming up in less than a week and it's got me mooooore than excited. Also, this will probably be yet another devisive posts. As always, consult a doctor or dietician before engaging in any drastic changes in your diet or you could DIE! Remember, this worked for me- not you. Annnnnnd speaking of dieticians...)

So on the bulletin board at the gym, they have apparently hired themselves a dietician. She's pretty. Fit. Blonde. Sunkissed (all of this I surmised by her photo.) She has the appropriate pedigree (Master's in Biology, Foodology, Physiology or what have you.) She even included below her biography/introduction page her favorite recipe for "healthy" waffles... and smoothies.

And I. Don't. Trust her.

I mean, is it just me or would you trust Pamela Anderson to tell you what to eat, or Baron Vladimir Harkonnen?
Pictured: A guy that knows his sandwiches. Incidentally, this was found on a website titled "Fat Bad Guys". Thought I'd share.

I'm kidding, of course. I think that dieticians and personal trainers both are integral to adopting a safe and healthy lifestyle impetus. I've just never had much use for either, you know? I mean, frassing to friends and family about how I already know I eat healthy, I substitute whatever for whatever is fat free...I don't know. I guess I figured I already knew how to eat healthy. What I didn't figure is that I was such a damn poser about it.

Look. I don't mean to brag, but I've lost some weight. It's true. The other day before I engaged in a big lawn project I started looking for a pair of my grubby jeans. I ended up grabbing some from the musty pile of discards in the basement...only realizing that they weren't my torn up grubbies from the thrift store but my old "good" Gap jeans.

That I haven't been able to wear since before the cruise in 2008


Pictured- 34 X 30's being held up by a belt. And before you roll your eyes and tell me I'm flexing, you up and use an edger tiller for 4 hours and try mulching up a 4x3 section of new garden and see if you aren't exhaus...and I've been working pretty gawdamn hard at the gym...you know what? Forget it. Just...hey, 34 x 30's btw.

And just today, I weighed myself on the Devil-scale at the gym. As much as I hated it for showing a weight that was closer to 200 lbs 3-4 months ago I'm hoping that it isn't pulling my leg this time by saying that my weight was below 180.

For the first time. In over 3 years.

So here is the part where (if you've actually been following along, per normal) I reveal my huge free fitness secret. You can attribute it to running shitty long-distances over the last 3 months or so. Cutting out hard liquor last Fall. Whatever. I think it's mostly getting to the point in my training where I've figured out how to re-direct my terrible relationship with portion sizes and how certain foods affect me physically on a daily basis... and also from the standpoint of what fuel is most useful in helping me train effectively. And it turns out, I realized that I had a lot of what NASA refers to as "Solid Fuel" to use. In part...

1) The banana-rexic thing is a joke Moda and I came up with after I'd been so busy w/work et.al that I showed up for dinner starving because "All I had to eat today was a banana". (Truth) The reality is that I've figured out that I was (again) eating for the sake of eating at proscribed times, caving in to my snacky mentality, over-eating with the mindset that I was "in training", and binge-eating when my budget or time would allow. (Again, justifying a trip to Holy Land or Great Dragon buffet was a good idea to help eat more protein. Riiiight)

So I just stopped doing that. I started by drinking a lot more water and flavored sugar-free soda water in the morning and would just...put off having my breakfast yogurt and banana until closer to 10 am or so. I felt hungry by the time I needed to eat them, and it was close enough to lunch that it didn't make sense to me to snack or eat anything else before noon.

Annnnnnd I kind of went vegetarian. Kind of. Actually, mostly. (editors note: I'll probably bend your ear on another blog regarding how I've changed on this standpoint on this over the last 15 years or so. It's definitely fuel for another story.) Outside of being a good way to get your nutrients and roughage, I found that eating a whole box (sorry Moda) of Morningstar (insert the following: Mini-corn dogs, Buffalo Nugs, Ribs, Spicy Black Bean Burger) was a good way to get my lunch fix out of the way and not feel hungry until dinner. During tech, I'd have some soup and a large piece of crusty bread before hitting the in-house gym and if I was SO hungry I couldn't take it? I'd grab a Clif bar from S.A. and another liter of water. At night, I'd get home tired so I wasn't eating a big meal before bed. Then I'd repeat the routine during the work week.

On weekends I'd cheat, sure. It felt (sort of) uncomfortable eating a big breakfast and I found that I wasn't able to finish the big meals that I used to polish off in a sitting. And I usually wound up full enough to go the rest of the day doing chores/training/projects until dinner. Eater's remorse usually wasn't a factor because I'd try to go into the meal knowing if I demolished half a pizza, I'd wind up feeling like shit.

The biggest piece of my own advice that (I guess) I'd give away is this- It's important to stay hungry mentally and physically. To work on really, really getting the most enjoyment out of meals by holding off on eating them, and not eating it all of it in a sitting. And the trick, the hard part? Is disciplining yourself enough not to give in and gorge when the meal comes around.

2) That whole "solid fuel" joke and part about going vegetarian? Really wasn't all that jokey. Okay, so it's known in running circles that the idea of "carbing up" isn't all that smart to do the day right BEFORE the race. (Giving your body the time to break it down into usable glucose stores for extended running after having eaten a mere 8 hours before race day? Right. It doesn't make much sense. Two days? Gives you enough time to break it down.)

My pre-long race foods the night before are usually roughage heavy or (my favorite)= Sushi. Get a little Omega 3 in there, some rice, and I'm good to go the next morning without feeling too stuffed or acid reflux-y. And post-race? The idea of grease/beer/etc. is almost as nauseating to me as smelling bad milk. (I just...ugh. I want something simple. My tummy just gets messed UP post-distance runs.)

As for the solid fuel line, it's because of a comment that D-Gangs made a few months ago. The way I see it, I had a lot of fuel (extra adipose) wrapped around my waist. A lot. Male-Muffin Top, whatever. So whenever I was on a regular training run and after having a limited calorie daily diet I'd make it so that I was visualizing using "What I Had in the Tank". (And it's GOOD fuel. The chubs-sorry- are a rich source of energy to push you through.)

I didn't do this stupidly, mind you. I knew the 2 days before long runs I needed to carb up and I didn't place myself in the realm of ridiculous by starving myself. (Useless ideology if you ask me. Food tastes too good, and having no energy to run/lift makes the concept of getting stronger/improving PR's invalid.) But yeah. On my 3-6 miles early jaunts I eschewed having toast or a waffle and bread-y things for a banana and loading up on some water. Easy enough. And my energy has been fine.

And I'm down quite a few l.b.esses.

So that's the big secret. Hollywood stars and models need to work out a shit ton and starve themselves. It's true, and it's true. And if you think to the contrary, you're very very wrong. Starve. Themselves. And I'm vain, but not that vain to wanna look like I've been in a slave camp. But I am admittedly vain enough to use the fuel I had on me to push me through the training and feel good physically and in terms of self-image.

Bottom line- eat less. Do more cardio. It's the same formula that's been around for ages.

Movie Review: "Role Models"

"Role Models" (2008) is currently available on DVD and Netflix.

I don't know why I waited so long to check out this movie after I watched it since it turned out to be a lot better than I expected it to be. (Oh wait, yes I do. The trailers made it seem hyper-formulaic, McLovin from "Superbad" looked like he was about to get stuck in a character rut until he grew older and developed a drug-habit, and it had Stifler in it. And that dude bugs. Mind you, I like Paul Rudd but everything he touches does not -in fact- turn to gold)

Two buddies who work for an energy drink company get into trouble and as part of their court-ordered community service wind up acting as mentors to two children who carry baggage of their own. (One, a Larping Social Misfit and the other a sassy boob-obsessed foul mouthed miscreant.) Hijinks ensue, and along the way they all learn something about growing up. And, scene.

Lame premise, right?

It took me a few minutes finding myself laughing at the dialogue (which was funny, without being too glib or dirty) to figure out why I was digging on it so much: David Wain directed it. Doi. So the easy review is if you were in to the off-center comedy of "The State", "Wet Hot American Summer", "Stella", etc. then you'll probably enjoy the heck out of this film.

Paul Rudd still plays deadpan/snarky/sarcastic but it's layered with this world-weariness ("Am I getting too old to do these stupid Bromance Comedies?") and coupled with Sean William Scott- Still playing a motormouth d-bag- (Who again, makes you wonder if it's the 30-something guy who just didn't grow out of the frat party), it works to give a balanced tone throughout the narrative. Likewise, the kids end up being a large part how their characters grow, but they don't ever let them fall back while the big-names take center-stage.

And Oh...oh...Joe LoTruglio...nearly made me wet myself.

A lot of times when film has a tagline of having dialogue that's "largely improvised", I'm left a little skeptical. Done well, you get memorable dialogue and and a top grossing comedy. Done poorly, you get actors who pull a Jimmy Fallon and look at each other like they're waiting to laugh and rambly diatribes that never seem to end. Here, you just have to listen to Jane Lynch give her motivational speeches and admonishing lectures just to see how sublime, effortless, and pointed it can be. (And dear God...so, so funny. Hang out through the credits to watch her "hot dog" bit)

I won't lie. I'd even hazard to say that I'd own this one. It was that funny and repeat viewings would probably open up more opportunities to catch missed laughter.

Or I'm just into the schtick of the guys who did "The State". Either way, a pretty great film.

3/4

PS- Outside of playing "Miri", Elizabeth Banks must be making it a career move to play characters with variations on her first name. Here, we have her as "Beth"...yet again.

Rapture Crapture

Wasn't there something about the end of the world this last weekend? What with the goody-two-shoes being grabbed by an invisible hand and being taken to heaven or something? (It kind of reminded me of the episode of "Six Feet Under" where the woman is driving along and the truck full of inflatable x-rated blow-up dolls loses it's cargo and she gets into an accident watching all the bodies "ascend" into heaven, mistaking it for the rapture. Anyone? Anyone?)

Well it didn't happen, whatever it was. I was kind of hoping for a zombie apocolypse (*). At least that was something I was prepared for.

Pictured: Far too many sharp objects for a person to have laying around and not be used for beheading zombies, or dicing produce. Please note, I was all set to have a party. You know. Bring your own shotgun, canned goods, bottled water, etc. Hole up in the basement. Take out a zombie one at a time as they come down the stairs and enjoy a cheese flight. That sort of thing.

Instead of the rapture, we received a mini-smoting that took the form of a tornado that remarkably didn't come ripping up through the Southern and Western parts of the metro and decided to just touch down whereever it darn-well pleased: Meaning the Northside.

Of COURSE I only found this out as I was leaving the matinee and I received a few frantic voice messages from my mom and later when listening to NPR on my way home and hearing the damage reports. (And yes, once again I found myself in a show during storm season completely oblivious to the weather outside. It was different from the old summers 7-8 years ago where CRPC was pretty much right next to a storm siren so if it went off, we'd stop, then re-state our line and keep going. Now I'm in a black box and we managed to barrel through a 68 minute matinee with a group of sassy seniors and didn't hear boo. And to think we were worried about the musical in the theater next to us being distracting.)

Anyway, I got home for a quick damage assessment and then started to check Facebook for the remainder of the afternoon and evening to see what was the status of my friends who live in North Mipples... only now realizing (due to Facebook) that I have quite a few more buddies on the North side than I thought. Further still, being grateful that other people in the world were throwing their good will and concern into cyber-space, and more over that everyone who responded (and their pets) are all okay. Joplin, MO got f#cked yesterday by their tornadoes, and as always it could have been a lot worse.

Speaking of- I don't have any pics to show you since I didn't have even a knocked over herb pot to show for it. (Really? I think I've experienced at least 8-9 tornado-y severe weather systems in the last 6 years that I've been in my house and nary a ONE decides to knock that decrepit pine tree over onto my s#itty garage? Right. Right. Gratitude, Michael. Please.) Poor FeeJ, however, took some pretty impressive damage to her home and needed some emergency chainsaw action for her tree. This, of course, made me realize that the closest chainsaw I have is in my mom's garage where she currently isn't using it and if it was in MY possession I could have totally been a hero yesterday and lent my services.

Come to think of it...a chainsaw would have tooootally been useful for the zombie apocolypse, doi. Two birds with one stone and all that.


*Zombies have been on my list of unnatural fears since I was 7-8 years old and the concept of death was very scary to me. That and the "Thriller" video running ad nauseum on MTV made me fret every time we drove past a cemetary. I fully expected to see the dead burst forth from the earth and start break-dancing or showing jazz hands.

1 Angry Opening...wait, that sounded bad.

I TOLD You! There is some MAD hackting going on here. Even "Angry". See what I did there?

We're opening tonight, friends. If you're a F'Booker you've see a few of the photo's that I've posted for this monster. Everything about it has been a great, and it's been a pleasure working with the cast. (They are some mighty talented people. And for s#it's sake, it's the first time I've worked with 80% of'em! You want my personal reason I think theater is made of awesome? Okay, so you have your friends/buddies/softball team...whatever. And then you all sit down, stand up, move around, told where to go, and get to create something really, really cool. All together. And then afterwards, you get drunk and tell the same stories from that one show that one time.)

I don't get schmoogly that often over shows, but this one is going to be good. C'mon down and get yerself entertained!

And, you know...it's short. Clips along. Like a Fringe show.

I told you it was a very "Indiana Jones" suit.

Humble Garden Beginnings take 4, er, 1...

The title of today's piece is because I realize that over the last year or so I've been writing repeat blog title's. Not a big deal, but "It's the Day of the Race, Y'all" before the Get in Gear 10K? EXACT same shit I typed last year at the same time. I'm an Uncreative Urkel.

Please note...the following post is very sad:

While it's with some excitement that comes with the Spring planting season, it's also a marked change. Since we humbly started our garden 4 seasons ago (when it was about the size of a door frame)it was done so as a joint venture. Since Moda has finally moved into her new home, she will be embarking on landscaping and gardening tasks of her own tastes and fancies. While we still plan on being "Bi-Coastal" gardeners (if you can count Central Ave and 37th Ave NE as the divider) it does mean a few changes for my routine personally.

I confess that while the property was mine, I was more than happy to sit back and let Moda do the general puttering and maintenence during the planting and harvest season. (To be fair, it wasn't really a case of "I'm gonna sit back and dick around while she's pulling up weeds. I've been the garden expander and mulch/dirt hauler in addition to the expense sharer when it comes to the usual plantings. In addition to the other maintenence and landscaping as well. Hey. Just speaking my piece, fools.)

Anyway, the kerflufflings at her new casa in addition to my roommate being smack in the middle of finals (read: He gets up, plants himself in front of his laptop in the nook, and doesn't excise himself until the late hours) means something new to me, or at least, as new as an experience can be around your home of 6 years: I'm relegated to doing most of this shit all by myself.

I know, I know, "Woe is me" but really it's going to be fodder for a new style of humble beginnings in which you get my gardening skills which tend to lean toward barrelling into things headlong versus the smarter method planned research my S.O. tends to do. It should prove exciting.

Lastly, I've decided to make a few more projects happen. While doing internal repair/design/remodelling typically scares me, landscaping projects are an area where I feel that it only takes a little moxie, muscle, and the werewithal to make your dreams come true. That, and a metric f#ck-ton of cedar mulch.

So in the interest of giving you pictures for those disinclined to read these dumb things: Here is the beginnings of the Great Garden/Landscaping/Bounty extravaganza 2011!

It's like the "Great Muppet Caper", but with foliage!(Stage 1.5: The topmost picture is my front planter. The tulips are all up and happy and ready to die, yet again. Or get eaten by the bun-buns. The marigolds are planted for some consistent color)

Pictured: The author with his gumption in tact and new work gloves. While the cost of the dumb things is about as much as a 6-pack of the black/yellow work gloves my father was fond of, I find the ability to have a better grip and dexterity to be helpful. And, they have some nice padding in addition to mesh backs. So they breathe.

I usually have to replace my Shepard's Crook hanging basket annually and this year I went with the coconut fiber bottom. I'm sad to say it's already manky and will probably need replaced toute suite. Bad investment, that. However, by way of a housewarming/gardenwarming gift I did hook up Moda with her own Shep/Crook and black & white Dafoodils in a hanging basket. Thanks, Farmers market!

My favorite: The lilac boarders. They're a little late due to the cold hanging out so long, but they're purpling up nicely. (And I have a few whitey's as well) I'm anxious for the 5 days or so that they smell will waft through my open windows. (Not pictured, the de-vining I had to do. Scratched myself up good doing that crap)

Right. The little rosemary that could. Planted last season, we brought her in during the winter and surprisingly she hung on in spite of bouts of mankiness. Go figure, the first time I think it's okay to move outside, boom. So it was off to compost heaven, just in time to make room for...

my first Farmer's Market visit! Alone! What? I don't know...it's always been a partner trip for me. I knew that I wanted to get my herbs potted but to hold off on veggies until next week going into June. The assortment was 1st split up (Moda got half) and the rest with the things we use regularly around the kitchen: Basil, Cilantro, Italian Parsley, new Rosemary, etc. ALSO, I bought my first asparagus plant. Had we planted some around the 1st year we made the garden, we'd have been enjoying potty smells for the last two seasons. Now, I won't be able to enjoy it until I'm nearing 40 years of age. My potty should still smell.

And there she is. Dusty and rusty, but ready to go. I'm doing what I've (repeatedly) told myself I wasn't going to do and expand her out about 2-3 more feet. I figure it'll give me another few fighting feet to keep the Creeping Charlie at bay, and It'll give me room to put more things in it. (Right now, we're experiencing the joys of nearly half my garden being taken up by garlic. The scapes, I'm sure, will be delish-come June. However there was the tiny issue of room for the rest of the garden. I'm planning on tomatoes, peppers, broccoli, and maybe-Mayyyyybe some Zukes. I already tossed a handful of green onions in a pot so they don't blow up. We'll see)

More dirt was needed where it settled over the winter. I'd read that adding manure/compost early on will help maintain a rich soil base for the summer. So you're looking at around 300 lbs of shit and dirt. And it's heavy, and spread. (My composter is still digesting, as you can see. Note- I was able to convince my roommate that turning the composter every two weeks is "good exercise." He responded by asking if he could do it more than every two weeks. No lie.)

These next two pictured above and below are the areas in my yard where I plan on doing the majority of my landscaping projects this summer. My yard is divvied up into sort of a "Quad", with the garden being the furthest back, then the small lot behind the garage, then closer to the house with the patio/grill on one side and the boxelder on the other. Soooooo, to reduce the amount of lawn to maintain I'm planning on tearing it up where it gets the most direct sun and subsequently requires the most water and covering it with mulch- Then finishing by planting some native perrenials to pretty it up. That'll leave the front yard and the far back as the only mowable patches. And I need a bocce court.

Movie Review: "Bridesmaids"

Spoilers Spoilers Spoilers...This should come as no surprise, but if you really don't want to know Jack about this before you see it then you should skip this.


Because guess what?


People get married. SURPRISE!

This one has been on my radar since I first saw the trailer a few months ago, and I finally had a date night last night so that we could go see it. While I like going into anticipated movies with high-ish expectations and have it invariably not disappoint- It doesn't hurt that I have a mini-crush on Kristen Wiig and her "brand of comedy". (And I HATE falling back on cliche's. Bleargh. Anyway...)

Nutshell Plot Synopsis:

Plucky single gal Annie (Wiig) gets tapped by her childhood BFF Lillian (Maya Rudolph) to be the maid of honor at her wedding. Competetion for her affection and feelings of self-doubt/worth are added when a new friend (Rose Byrne)seeks to usurp her role. When the bridesmaids are assembled, hijinks ensue.

Hooookay. Were you trying to win points with your girlfriend, Michael? What's up?

Look, it was really, really funny. I've read a lot the (cough) "cheaper" reviews have said things like (From the poster on the wiki page, and I quote) "Chick Flicks don't have to suck!". Really? Reeeeeally? That's, uh, that's really fricking stupid. Why not skip the stupidity and just present the facts of the matter? And the fact is, Kristen Wiig co-wrote a really great film.

Look, we've all seen doofy ensemble pieces when they have a penis slapped on them, and while I think trying to make a comparison to a similar genre piece is natural (ala' "The Hangover", which could easily have been "Bachelor Party: The Next Generation") I think it does a disservice to the movie they've created. A solid, laugh-out-loud and highly recommendable film- Good for a date night, "chick flick", whatever.

I mean, there've been a wealth of gross-out joints, improvised yuck-fests, and "high-brow" meta-wink-at-the-audience every 5 minutes, that have permeated theaters for the last 10 years or so. And I'd like to go on record that you might want to try and go into this with some weird preconception before hand. And then get your ass surprised.

So it's well written. Did you laugh?

Almost from the get-go. From Wiig's initial banter with her cad-tastic booty-call (Jon Hamm), to the introduction of the remaining bridesmaids- all of whom bring a unique stamp to characters that could have easily been played too broadly or stereotypically. Gone are the prat-falls, sassy know-it-alls, the need to age the protaganist 30 years old to learn a lesson, or dumb plot-point of sending out the guy for tampons just to see if they're worthy. And, points for not having a McConaughey in site.

And the most unbelievably hilarious and cringe-worthy scene involving food poisoning, dress-fittings, and pants-pooping.

And some of my favorite scene's are with Wiig and Rudolph just having casual banter over coffee or wine. It felt real. And if you give me an honest scene, I'll go with you for 90-100 minutes. Moreover, (and doubling back to characters who aren't played ridiculously broad) the love interest is given clever dialogue that doesn't make them immediately the obvious "best guy for her" but makes them a decent guy with decent intentions. Does it make her booty call look bad? Yeah, but it's Don Draper. The guy sells the line "Time for a lap nap" like nobodies business.

I'll talk about my favorite character in a minute.

Fine, fine. To what would you speak ill?

Not much, actually. There are a few scenes "sans laughs" that go on a leeeeetle bit too long, so it felt occasionally draggy. And here's where I wanna talk about my favorite bridesmaid of the bunch- Melissa McArthy as "Megan". If you've seen the preview, you know she's the crass one. And as a result, she gets a lion's share of the biggest laughs throughout the movie. (And she fearlessly earns the shit out of them. I don't think there was one scene she was in that I didn't laugh obnoxiously or immediately repeat what she just said out loud b/c I couldn't believe what I had just heard)

Overall they were sporting some impressive cast members: You had "Reno 911's" Wendi McLendon-Lovey as the "sex-starved" housewife, "The Office"s Ellie Kemper as the sweet and prudish bridesmaid...so I guess if I had one beef it's that I wanted more of where they were going. (In their brief pieces of dialogue they had some great bits. And I'm really just happy they stayed away from making their bits into "What hijinks will they get to Vegas?" type-shenanigans. See? It's hard to find something bad about it.)

Oh, I'm also a little tired of the "Say Anthing" ending when the gal gets her guy that you've been rooting for. In a film that felt original a fun, it seemed an awful lot like how "The House Bunny" ended. (Another terrific comedy)

So you recommend?

Yup. I'd even go so far to say that this is a flick that would be fun to have on the DVD shelf. (The true mark of a good comedy is if it holds up to repeat viewings. That and how much can I quote it later, I suppose. But Moda has nixed my saying "Lap Nap" if I'm feeling amorous.)

My biggest hope is that these women continue to raise the bar in all-female ensemble comedies and that people keep going to see them. After the movie, a teary Moda said it best: "Weddings are hard". Ain't that the truth? So is comedy. And this movie played them well. With a dash of Wilson Phillips.

4/5 Stars

Twangryman!

It's probably high-time I stopped frassin about running and workouts since I'm nigh-on positive it's starting to grate on my 2 to 3 easy-readers. I haven't said boo (really) about Thee-hater since "Joseph" so I figured I'm due for a blog about the boards.

First up:

We're finishing up a quick N' dirty rehearsal run for "12 Angry White Dudes Frassin" and heading into tech next week. I've mentioned previously that since finding out I was cast in it way back in the Fall (Jeebus. That long ago?) I've been sick-excited to start rehearsing. And the best part is that it's been about as awesome as I'd anticipated. Without getting into self-loathing too much, working with talented basterds like these guys is always challenging and fulfilling on many levels for myself as a performer. Mostly because it forces me to get out of my natural comfort zone and dig deep to play ball with the big boys. And to stop with my natural approach to scene work and character study: Hair-Acting. (Or "Hacting", if you prefer truncation)

See, I really...reeeeally don't feel I've honed in on the center of my character until I've made a discovery about what kind of facial hair or hair style the person is. "Does he have a Van Dyke or a full beard?" or "Is this a right-side part or a left-side part" become as vital and important of questions as "What's my motivation". (The answer? A Nap. Always.)

The second part is the costume. Since this is a period piece, we've been bedecked in the finest 50's apparel. Which for yours truly- Juror #6? Means a three-piece-suit...Yeeeeeeah bitches. Now, wearing the thing does give you a certain posturing and an early "Mad Men" vibe. To tell the truth, is that it actually makes me feel more like Indiana Jones when he's describing the Ark to the Army guys in "Raiders".



(Pictured: Mileage, not years. And this actor's extraordinary false sense of image)

I'm gonna see if I can buy it after the run. The thing is too damn nice. Timeless, even. Speaking of getting a suit after a gig:

Tonight is the PRE-miere of the lil' docu-skit I shot last summer. (Remember? The frightening experience of learning to drive stick in a Model-A car?) We'll be taking to the Mounds theater and...well it's cool that they're hosting an event at movie-house to show this thing but I was a little hesitant to attend. Firstly I don't want to be put out on my night off from rehearsal b/c I tend to be lazy like that and want to catch up on my Netflixing. Secondly, and the real reason, is I don't want to see my big fat face on the big fat screen in any capacity. I haaaate seeing myself on film. (Sure, I'll post it for others, but ugh. There's a reason I have a face for radio. And it was back when I was pounding the vodka. Hello water-retention and the additional 20 lbs the camera adds.)

Anyway, it was a good experience to shoot and I had a good time doing it. The least I can do is get over myself, be a supportive cast-member, and stop pretending to be the actron who hates premieres and seeing themselves on camera long enough to take my mom on a date to see it. Okay? Shut up. If you haven't seen it, the trailer and information about the movie are here.

Lastly...and speaking of suits...here's the vid I shot a few weeks back with my buddy Ry-Gonn. If you're curious as to why my hackting is so stilted and Shatnerian...well you try memorizing your script same-day and learning to say the name of a firm after you've been jokingly calling it goofy nick-names for fun. It's not all glamor.

And what did I say? The rakish mop truly adds to the character.

Someday, I'll be able to peel a banana with'em...

A few weeks back when Spring started her evil tease, I relegated a few hours to raking up and thatching the back and front yards to get the leaves which had been covered by our early November snowfall and rotting under the snow during our endless winter. I headed out to the mud room and slipped on my "outdoor shoes", which in my home generally means "whatever running shoes I retired from the last year". (And these particular trainers were the 1st investment shoe I made when I started race training properly last March. A comfortable shoe is a must for lawn frassin', and those b#tches were done broke in)

After a few hours and with the full knowledge that I'd be a little sore from raking, I was surprised waking up the next morning when I discovered that I could also barely walk. My knees, which hadn't been problematic since this seasons race training (knock on wood) and hips felt like there were hot spiky bands wrapped around them. Sure , I had ran and lifted earlier that day. But this wasn't workout-soreness. Noooo...this...this was shitty and acute pain. And it wasn't until the next time I attempted to tenderly go for a run that it occurred to me...


These a$$holes were still in those "retired" running shoes:



I've mentioned the fun that comes with race training and seeing how far you've come- even if it's only your first or second season. When Moda and I started last year, she was gung ho- collecting as many facts and as much information as she could about marathon racing which was why we found ourselves making our first trip to a running store for a free, professional assesment of our running gaits in order to determine a good shoe/insert that would fit our needs, and help diminish the potential for injury. I had had some pre-existing issues, sure. I was a casual jogger at best at that point...but I figure I'd try anything to keep me hale and hearty. $25 later and with the assurances of the clerk that these were a decent mid-range running shoe insert- we were off to the trails.

Except Moda was still having some hip and knee issues. And grew frustrated. So she continued with her reading and researching. (For my part, I was just gritting my teeth to get through the pain and felt like I was being supportive when actuall I was just following along.) After a few weeks, she started reading up about the recent increase in the idea of barefoot running, more specifically, the onset of the five-finger running shoe- popularized by Vibram.

Behold the Vibram weird f#cking shoe (tm):




If you've managed to read this far, please note that this isn't trying to be a sales pitch, soapbox, or the gospel of safe and injury-free running. I'm completely and totally aware of the parade-pissing-party that happens when you mention Veebs around runners and atheletes- Whether it's from an aesthetic standpoint, or how the idea that barefoot running is "better" for you is unfounded medically speaking.

So if you want: I'd encourage you to read to your precious pink hearts content about the arguments, the studies, the historical significance of barefoot running, the testimonies, the naysayers. All that shit is out there for your perusal on teh interwebs. Go ahead. I'll wait. I'm all for being an informed runner/lifter etc.

What I'm trying to tell you, is just my...little old me? MY experience with the ugly sumbitches. Dig? So chillax. And as always, do what works, what's safest, what keeps you healthiest...and most importantly- What feels good.

Ohhhh HA HA HA HA HA!!! At first, I had a field day at her expense. I laughed at how they sounded when she ran. (With this weird "clopping" noise.) I asked if she'd be able to use her feet for cooking and chopping and driving. I quietly judged when she said her calves and quads were burning and I wondered if anyone was staring at the woman running barefoot on the treadmill at the gym. Or if they'd even wanna use it afterward. I was not what you'd call a convert.

Except- while we started running distances at about the same level/effort? You know...together? She amped up her training and started running farther, longer, faster, and stronger. The best I could do was stop with the sarcasm and teasing. And of course, eat her dust while I'd walk up hills, take NUMEROUS breaks, and usually...sometimes. A lot of times...just turn around outright and let her go while I walked back to the car. (Insert "Incredible Hulk" ending theme)

Eventually, she shucked her original trainers entirely, invested in Nike Free's, and started cross-training. It was around this time she lent me that great book which talks about Veebs, Free's, and Barefoot running in general. Yes, it gets preachy on occasion- But it's still a fascinating and entertaining book. And so while a laggard like me, who hates bandwagonning with an unbridled passion? Well I could get behind some of the speaking points. And I found some of the applications to be not only educational, but invariably put me over the fence into the minimalist running camp. So for your benefit/amusement, here are some of the basic bullets I've learned from minimalist/barefoot training incorporated with running technique that has helped me within the last 6-7 months.

(I know, right? It's always f#cked me up to think that something as elementary and rudimentary as RUNNING has to have a correct "form". I've been running since I was a TODDLER fer Chrissakes. Like I said...I just...well it was hard to wrap my head around.)

-Within the last 30 odd years or so, modern orthotics have provided a marked increase in the amount of, and different types of cushioning in athletic shoes.

-The more heel cushioning (for example) allows for the body to naturally impact harder when running outside. It also increases our tendency to have a harder heel-toe footstrike versus the "safer" mid-stride footstrike. So you land harder? You make a greater impact on your hips and knees. Or think about...

-Jog in place. Go on. (This is what made me think about the arguments for a minute) The idea is that how you jog in place is the natural way your body is meant to run: Smaller strides, mid-to-front range foot strikes, and your hips and upper body in alignment. The idea being your form shouldn't try and emulate a gazelle or a sprinter, but (sorry) a mall-walker moving faster. This is why I said in previous posts that running can and should be more involved in your head when it comes to doing it safely and to reduce the potential for injury. Moreover, by improving your form and footstrike you're activating and using the muscle which power you on your run: Glutes, Calves, and Quads.

-(Now, this next part is what gets everyone kerfluffling) Barefoot/minimalist running helps to engage the musculature and ligature of the feet to help improve resilience and foot strength, as well as endurance and posture. Collegiate coaches in track and cross-country will have their teams train barefoot on the track to improve their form, and race-historians have made observations that race times experienced a decrease from the first popularized heyday of marathoning in the late 60's-early 70's when cushioned shoes were made for people who wanted to be a runner but also wanted it to feel comfortable.


Vibrams were originally intended to be deck shoes for professional sailors b/c they emulated the natural contours of the foot and allowed for grippage. About 7-8 years ago, a barefoot running advocate lobbied to be their poster-boy. And so- The barefoot runners now had a minimalist and protected way to keep their feet safe from the elements and dangers of a wayward pebble or stick. And now the applications for them have reached into Yoga, Hiking, Martial Arts...you name it they've found a way to give you a new kind of Veeb.

So what did I do that was so different? I didn't have "chronic" pain. Sure, I was unhappy with my times during runs. Was that enough of an excuse to invest? Well as luck would have it, two things happened. The first? My mileage was up on my shoes. Various experts have various #'s when it comes to "when" you should retire your trainers. Since I'd put on about 400+ miles I figured new shoes were in order. So I frassed w/Moda and shopped around, which brought me to the 2nd thing- No one was carrying Nike Free's except the specialty stores. So I ended up with a model of minimalist shoe "1-Up" from the Free's. And they ended up being a good fit.

The Lunar Fly:



A few weeks later, as a treat to myself for my new job, I got myself some Veebs. I wore them casually at first- To the cabin. Around the yard. They were awkward. I had to endure a fair bit of ribbing from my family. Although I admit I enjoyed how it felt with the world underneath me, remembering how much fun it was to be barefoot as a kid. How sticks and rocks were "there" but not something to make you cuss and grab your foot. Eventually, I started wearing them to musical choreography rehearsals which garnered quite a bit more in terms stares, snickers, and comments, etc. (Hey. F#ck you. And send me a check, Vibram. I just found a new use for them...DANCE!)

And yet I was still scared to death to run in them. And then I felt stupid. So then I just did it. I incorporated an approach that I figured was safe (do a short treadmill workout, either doing hills on a low MPH or just flat out- 2 x's a week). The first day I ran in'em? I felt like a champ. No pain in my calves. (D-Gangs and Moda both said they were nigh on incapacited with lactic acid...but it was better than frassy knees and hips) And I didn't have a dreaded blister. Buh-wah-ha-haaa.

The second time I ran in them? F#ck me. Blisterville. Lactic Acid-ville. And then after the 3rd, 4th, 5th time? No worries. In fact, Moda commented that having had a few months in my minimalist shoes and then switching to Veebs probably saved me from the agony of da-feet. I'm proud to say that I accomplished my first actual outdoor run last week wearing them (versus only treadmill training). 5.75 miles. Non-stop. With some speedy downhills. And a good finishing time. (And the return of the big frassy blister. Whatever. I'll take it. It's just skin, right?)

So...for me personally? (And a few friends that have been trying them. And Free's. And Merrill's. And other forms of minimalist shoes?) Well I'm running stronger and smarter than I was a year ago. I'm not flat-out incapacitated immediately after, or even a day after my long runs and (so far) my races. Hills aren't as much of a problem. Distances either. And I'll knock on wood again...I haven't experienced a single frassy knee. (No clicking). Bad hip. (No burning or twitching) or that awful recurring lower back twinge that makes you want to do nothing more than lay down with a heating pad or Bio-Freeze and 800 mgs of ibuprofen. I guess cross/strength-training has helped a bit along with a more contientious approach to my running form. But I'll take smart running at this stage and age versus a good running time with $115 shoes and bad knee pain. Which I've done without.

Oh wait.

I did have one bad day of knee/back/hip pain. The day after I wore those stupid expensive inserts. Hm. Fancy that.

Movie Review: THOR

Here's the long and short of it, since I'm guessing a majority of people (i.e. "Nerds") will have already read the metric s#it-ton of reviews that have been circulating. They've been drooling and bickering on various geek-interweb sites about "how great it will be"s or how "it's gonna suck hammer-balls".

So here it is: If you liked the first installment of "Spider-Man", "X-Men", and "Iron Man"? Then you'll definitely dig on "Thor". A lot.


Without geeking out too much on the Marvel character, or Norse pantheon: The God of Thunder pisses off his dad (Hannibal Lechter) and gets his boom-boom power and hammer taken away before being cast down to earth as a mortal as punishment. While he tries to learn humility, hijinks in Asgard ensue.

Is it good?
Yup. It moves well, the action is fun, you don't need to be balls deep into the comic book to enjoy it, and it was a lot funnier than I'd have given it credit for. (To be fair, "Thor" was never I title I dug. It was like the writers wanted a character that gave them an excuse to write pseudo-Shakespearian prose whenever he opened his mouth) The 3D was fun, the scenes in Asgard were pretty, and the action was exactly how you'd think it should be.

Will my significant other dig it?
Sure. Like I said, there's beef cake, ass-kicking female characters (Sif rules. And even Freya doesn't take shit from no Frost Giant) And as I said before, the pace should be good enough to not feel like torture. And it has a really good sense of humor.

How was the acting?
Really good, actually. Hemsworth has this way of walking when he's on earth that's not quite a swagger, but more of a posture of entitlement (if that makes sense). I liked that they made it out that he was crazy and how everyone looked at him like he was delusional versus dimissing him outright or just falling for his schtick. He also has some great humanizing moments that I didn't expect from a comic-book movie. Who knew?

Hiddleston (of course) deserves a lions share of credit for his performance as Loki. (My rules on comic book bad guys? They need to be unstoppable threats, bat-shit crazy, or sympathetically complex. When Loki exclaims that he loves his brother more than any of them? I believed it. And by the end? I wasn't sure at all.) The Warriors Three and Sif were well rendered individual characters (Although Volstagg kind of reminded me of Leonidas from "300")

And yeah. Stringer Bell plays Heimdall. And he's awesome.

I guess my biggest beef (if I can call it that) was the Academy Award Winning Swan as the love interest. I think it was the first time I actually felt like making this woman a beautiful astro-physicist cum helpless-damsel-in-distress grated on me. I wanted her to be a bit tougher. But...by way of correction I think that it's important to say that (if viewed this way) it made an interesting distinction between the "Gods" and the "Mortals". It kind of felt like she was phoning it in. Of course the same can be said about Hannibal Lechter, but whatever. They both know when they should collect a paycheck.

(ps- This is dumb, but there was a scene towards the end that focused on her face, reeeeeally tightly. And I swear she was wearing her fake lashes leftover from "Black Swan". Whatever. I noticed the lashes. Love me for noticing)

What sucked?
What everyone else said. In spite of not feeling like a long movie, there were a few clunky beats here and there. Some superfluous characters who probably could've stayed on the cutting room floor. And as much as I liked seeing (SPOILER) Hawkeye for his cameo, it did feel kind of forced in there at the last minute-(In spite of some funny dialogue.) I don't mind that they're trying to "create this world of the Avengers", just don't sacrifice the flow of the film you're making and leave the non-geeks scratching their heads and having to lean over to their dates and ask "who's that supposed to be?"

And I had a thumper of a headache afterward. 3D'll do that.

Become the Mighty Geek- What's the nerdy stuff?
I really, really am starting to like Agent Coulson showing up in these movies. And as much as I just frassed about forced continuity, throwaway lines like (referring to the first appearance of The Destroyer) "Is that one of Stark's?"/"I don't know. He never tells me anything" made me smile. The Thor battles are pretty damn epic, and everytime they throw down he doesn't disappoint. The cameo at the end is yet another set-up for another movie (natch) and the Stan Lee cameo was played for decent laughs. One of my favorite moments was during the epic final battle when Thor just "sets" his hammer on top of his enemy, showing the weight of the thing and how Thor really is the only one who can truly wield it.

(Oh, and the preview for "Captain America"? The one that's been on TV? In 3D? Looks reeeeeally pretty. It truly is a good time to be a Comic-Book Nerd)

4/5 This will be a good companion DVD on your shelf to add to the rest of your individual Avenger movies.

Restaurant Review- Sushi

(Sigh) I feel like I'm doing this a disservice. I reviewed this place 3 or 4 years ago (or was it 4 or 5? I forget) and it was one of the 1st food reviews we wrote well before Moda began frassin for the CP. Sufficed to say, I'm going to continue to refer to this place "Japplebee's" in terms of it's cuisine, quality, and the type of crowd they're pandering to.

While we were out and about last night, Moda and I were in the midst of a severe sushi jones and since I'd passed this joint on the way to AL's birthday dinner earlier this week (And as it has recently opened in the 'hood) I thought that maybe it had came into it's own in spite of our initial experience being poor at their flagship restaurant in EP. (In case you forgot- Bad sushi, poor service, terrrrrible ambience)

We arrived well before the dinner hour, both very hungry, and both very willing to put our experiences behind us in order to expand our neighborhood options. The restaurant was quiet, tastefully decorated (with the exception of the weird Audrey Hepburn poster in the men's room. I didn't get it.) , and we were seated right away. We started off with: veggie gyoza, edamame (natch) and a small bottle of sake' to share.

The edamame was fine and brought out straightaway. The gyoza was...interesting. The dumplings were a shade of green and instead of the ground veggie/tofu innards I was expecting there were large tablets of edamame bean here and there. (A weird sensation on the palate, to be sure) Again, not great, but interestingly displayed.

As for the quality of the sushi? This is why people say they "hate" sushi. (Outside of the seaweed and raw fish, I guess) I won't even bother entertaining you with the kind of rolls we ordered. Simply put? They were warm. (Our same issue as the last time) And it wasn't even like they were "warm from sitting out or being heated" (I said at the very least with the temperature as it was I expected the fish to be manky or the rice to be firming) It was just...well room temperature sushi is kind of gross. And if that was their "thing" I don't think I'm alone in saying it's not how people are meant to enjoy sushi-room temperature and underwhelming. We ate it very fast.
Later we were given some complimentary fish eggs since they were originally to top our order but we were informed that they were still thawing out and needed a few minutes to prepare. (Note to self: You like the roe better than the whole slimy egg)

We were still hungry, but both quickly agreed that another roll wasn't what we desired. We shared some Udon noodles which were hot and filling but still- shy of out and out delicious. And the sake was pretty lame too. That, and when I said it panders? (The signage in front of the restaurant kept pimping the steaks, almost as if to say "Don't be afraid of the sushi! We have meat and potatoes too!") As for the quiet ambience, it was soon ruptured by the sound of a 3rd Date couple "Mr. Johnny Salami Loud-Talker", a pair of woman who I overheard loudly say they were only leaving a 10% tip, and finally...the random loud-ass gong followed by an obnoxious canned birthday party. (There was a hibachi birthday in the adjoining room. There's only so much cheering, clapping, robotic birthday songs, and clanking of knives one can take when they're trying to immerse themselves in a tranquil Japanese dinner)

We won't be going back again, as there are newer sushi options that have popped up in NE within the last few months that may beckon at a later date. All told, I feel like a douchey boyfriend for having "treated" my girl as a housewarming gift to a sushi dinner at a place that, after two at-bats, is just as disappointing the second time around.

I didn't think you'd catch that...

So my friend Ry-Gonn and his wife were kind enough to offer a quick giglet/internal shoot pimping a product for some clients this last weekend. I had to get dressed up all lawyerly and hustle my buns to get off-book. (A prospect hindered sliiiiightly by the fact that there was a bit of legal and technical jargon in there, Annnd coupled with my inability to always stay on script. Thankfully, his wifey was okay with that so long as I followed the story)

Hanging out on our marks, we were going over our scripts in between takes and joking about how we should have planned our wardrobe choices better (both of us were in our professional black suits along with a matching shade of blue dress shirt. Whoops) when I noticed in the bright camera lights some shiny silver streaking through Ry's temples and along the side of his head. And of course I commented on it.

Now...We've known each other for about 11 years, and while gray hair is part and parcel to getting older I found that I wasn't as much of a sarcastic schmuck as I probably used to be, going so far as to saying that I even had silver and gray hairs here and there. (And I do. There you go. I'm old. Shup) He took a sec, squinting and examining my head before stating that he didn't notice a single one. (Not out of being polite- mind. I'm just a titch closer to blonde than I am a true brownie.) So I lean forward, squint MY eyes and quietly under my breath Isay: "That's because it's in my puuuuuubes". No sooner did I say that than the camera man bellows

"I heard that."

Right. Forgot about that little microphone wired up through my shirt and clipped to my lapel. Fortunately, the guy was laughing and had a sense of humor about it*. And this, friends, is what we do to make a commercial shoot go faster.





*Speaking of crew lacking a sense of humor...Back in 1994 or so, I did my first student "film" for my friend AL and his cousin Jay. To say the shooting was "loose" would be an understatement and insult to slacker 19 year "film students". It felt fancy since we had a crew of one and everything, and after a big scene where I had to walk across the shot bare-ass and the director yells "CUT!"- for some reason we started making doofy religious jokes that culminated in our wanting to have a big crucifix on the wall that I hang from and commit suicide. Z(Whatever. For some reason we all thought it was funny at the time.) Except our cameraman, who went from noisily moving his equipmentfor the next shot to dead freaking silence in a heartbeat. When we all turned and looked at him (I'm still kind of buck nekkid at this time) he's staring at us with this...really uncomfortable intensity. So the director says "What's up, dude...are you like...Christian or something?" To which he responds cooly "Yes. Yes I am." And proceeds to pack up the gear and leave. And we're standing around feeling a mix of shame and...well... no. That's not really true. I was the only one who really felt any embarrassment at the faux pas and my nudity. Jay was pissed off and just wanted to finish his stupid film.

So you know, there's an probably an old film student out there somewhere with some prime footage of 19-year old me in my all together. I'd rather not speculate on what he did with it. Let's just leave it at that.

That's something off the bullet list, I guess.

This won't be contrary to my stance on not posting political jibba-jabba. It's pretty topical and has my gut in knots over the emotions/thoughts/perceptions of what has transpired since the news broke out late last night. In other words, it's kind of a big deal

I'm tired today. And I know that writing about my "feelings" is something that should probably be relegated to my gernal, or LJ...but I had a ton that I wanted to say about it. (I always do when monumental current world events happen. It's just there's always someone more eloquent who can post a quote, or a poem, or say what invariably gets stuck in my head. It's hard for me.)

I heard the news as I was getting ready for bed last night. My roommate stood outside my door and asked if I would mind turning on CNN to watch the White House response. I donned my robe, mobilized, found the channel (one hiccup of owning that big-ass tv? Finding the channel. I'm still learning that nightmare) And that's what we did. We sat in our jammies and would vascillate between the TV and a flurry of texts (him), or the TV and F'Book (me)...

I mean that's really kind of boring. Right? The biggest bookend story to the greatest planned attack on American soil. In our robes? No champagne. No "woohoo-ing". Nothing. In the last 10 years or so, you've all had that conversation at least a couple of times: "Where were YOU on 9/11?" Right? And people share with a somber respect for the even. And we remember. And it was...I'm sorry- it always will be a horrible event. An event that laid bare our feelings of safety, security, and comfort with this terrible tragedy that penetrated our shores. They made us bleed. And as a nation, we felt it. The anger, fear, insecurity, the pain and heartache. Nations came to our support. Even Quaddafi condemned the act.

And when we launched a war on "terror", we now had a face that was really the target. I knew about the blind cleric. The terror cells in the Middle East and Pakistan. I don't even think I'd have known who this guy was from Mary...but there was his face all over the news. And we were gonna git'em come hell or high water. And, I think collectively, as a nation, we were all fine with that.

So last night, why was I left feeling so...I guess "numb" is the best way to describe my feeling. Numb. Like a soldier after a pyrrhic victory?

I was going to start off today with one of those long-winded Mikey rants about the last 10-15 years in terms of how it culminated in the events of last night...about history and the despair that comes with repeating itself...blah blah blah. How it's so important to know how this affects us but also that if we don't take the measures to remember this as a country, that in the future this "victory" could be a shallow one. That the best we, as a nation, can now hope for is that those who suffered directly and the most can at least find a small amount of closure. And I'll probably touch on that. Sorry. I'm full to burst.

What really has my head spinning is the schizophrenic way that this historical recent world event played out...So let's look at the last 72 hours or so:

-Friday...Rich entitled young white kids having their wedding televised to the world
-Friday...Rich entitled atheletes and owners figuring out who a QB is going to be
-Friday...The final launch and postponement of the space shuttle Endeavour
-Sunday...The death of one of the most sought after evil leaders in the last 50 years.

This is big stuff that just happened. Over the weekend. (Not to mention on a personal note that I ran a race, rehearsed my show, shot a video for a court reporting firm. I digress.) It's just...can you take a second to see how the world and our news shifts gears so quickly and tangentially that it causes my head to hurt?

So I'm watching this last night, listening to the broadcasters kill time before the Prez comes out, seeing the images of the rally outside of the White House, and I started to harbor some pretty weird thoughts on the matter. These are first impression-y kind of things:

-Is this a true statement, Mr. Newscaster? I mean...It's been 10 years and he was nigh on impossible to find. IMpossible. So my first thoughts were: "Are you sure?" and "The public will want to see images or something. These days no one is happy unless they get a gruesome image" and "They sure as shit better be sure". My second thought? So who's gonna get the lottery winnings that was the price on his head? The guy that pulled the trigger? Will they even pay it out?

-The babies. Almost all of the faces they were showing outside of the White House- cheering, smiling, with their makeshift "victory" signs made out of pizza boxes with their clever slogans? They were so, so young. I mean, they had to be college kids. (NPR this a.m. reported that a majority of them were. Meaning they were all little, little kids when this first happened.) And this is what turned me into Grandpa Mikey- These kids are acting like it's a rally or sporting event. Fist pumping. Chest thumping. Cheering that someone is dead like they're in Munchkinland and a pair of stocking feet are rolling back under a Kansas Farmhouse. And...Look, I'm not sad that he's dead. Not one bit. But, for the life of me, I can't imagine cheering on a death. It feels so macabre.

To double back...you know the people who cheer during death penalty executions aren't typically the immediate families? (They just want closure and for the events to be put behind them.) The loud one's tend to be the protestors on both sides of the prison fence. The one side has signs for life and holds candles- the other chants for death and retribution. And here's where I started to feel extraordinarily sad: This war (wars? Engagements? I get confused), has never really seemed to have a definitive "end" in sight. (Mission accomplished indeed) Lookit all the "bad guys" we've arrested or executed or torutured over the last 10 years and tell me that it doesn't feel like just another bump in the road. Are the goals to end these wars wholly dependent on the death of one person because they were the figurehead to us?

It doesn't feel balanced. It doesn't feel like the senseless deaths caused by the tragedy, the countless deaths of the young men and women overseas fighting these wars have been justified by what has happened. Something felt bigger than this.

I also wasn't sure if I felt this was a victory or not because when it comes to terrorist "cells", they'll always have another bastard come by and pick up the mantle. My roommate called it a victory b/c it was the death of a terrorist figurehead. Well okay. But what if, within their infrastructure, while it sucks for them that their appointed leader is dead that the only thing they think of is that they need to scramble to appoint another CEO and keep right on trucking? And we're left waving or flags of victory for a perceived moral victory...While we're still fighting. We're still at war.

- 2 mixed things: I hate the news. Whenever you get a news story of this magnitude invariably it winds up being talking heads repeating sound bites and filling it full of wacky unproven improv until the story is confirmed. (When I first turned on my TV on 9/11 the reporters were saying that there was a possible death toll of 10,000 or greater. Seriously. I still have my little notebook where I tried dictating what I was hearing on the news verbatim until my wrist hurt.)

When 9/11 happened, movies like "Wag the Dog" and the idea of "spun" news stories was perceived as merely fodder for fiction. Terrorist actions...in 1993...1995...various embassy bombings throughout India et.al. Those incidents were reported at what (now) seems like a snails pace through our 2-3 news outlets. In our post-9/11 world we ended up with dozens of news sources with so many different ways of spinning the problems of the world at large- although they all agreed our newest bad guy. And it wound up being a guy, in a turban, with Dumbledore's beard.

We had our new enemy. WE had already forgotten how these were the same "bad guys" in 1990 and 1991. Think about it...after 1990 we lost the big boss baddies when we up and became buddies with Russia. But hot damn, oil and gas are too important and we needed someone to hate. So we got ourselves pissed at Saddam and Quaddafi. And the war was over in a week, with our SCUDs, night vision and all. And even though he became a pop culture doof- (Not one, but two appearances in Proft/Zucker movies) Saddam dropped off the map. We plain ignored him for 10 years. Even Quaddafi didn't seem like the vile overlord we had thought he was. And we ignored him too. Well they'll make for fetching targets again! If we can't find these cave dwelling terrorist then we'll fight people who have guns and WMDs! And lookit this! And we caught one of'em!. He done got found like a mole in the ground! He got hisself a trial and done executed. Hoo Rah for 'Merika! And lookie here at the last few months! Quaddafi is topical again! (I guess we can say the same about Trump, right?) And crazy! And we killed his kids! And we're gonna git'em!

But we got fuzzy face first. And finally. With thoughtful and planned intelligence gathering and a minimal/non-existent loss of life in civilians or our Armed Forces. The timeline, if it isn't a spin and I'm not being too cynical, was about 7-8 months from the initial reports on his location. In. Out. Found. And dead.

And again, all I could think of is that these aren't tunneling terrorist cave rats. These are guys that have someone with a shit ton of money putting up the dough to help keep them hidden. Which means, there's a nameless face out there who shares the "hate-on" America. And they're still writing checks. So you'll please forgive me if I'm still a little concerned. I'm not saying what happened isn't an amazing display of agencies working together for a swift and common goal- I just don't think this counts as our generations VE day.

Which brings us to F'Book and my second (and hopefully final) point- Before we had the capability to compartmentalize our feelings/religion/polictical stances in 140 character or less text bites? We had email/cellphones/telephones. (And mail. But even in 2001 physical letters were considered passe') With the magic of Facebook, I've been able to connect with old neighbors, teachers, high school- hell-elementary school mates. People who I might've seen once every few years at a reunion or something. Where you might get a phone number and promise to call but it falls through or you forget. So with the cliche' being "as you get older you become the people you lived with" (Meaning, your parents... to a certain degree) The friends you played "Army" with as kids and had sleepovers or went tee-peeing or whatever..? They have mortgages and babies and spouses and car payments and roofs that might need new shingles and credit card debt...And that's the famous commonality.

But what FB has got me frassy about (and a little sad) is that...well ...now I know more about these people than I might have if I didn't have a connection with them in the first place. And that isn't entirely a great thing, I fear. It's one thing to wear your faith and political beliefs on your sleeve. But leave it to an event like the death of the leader of that terrorist group to act as an impetus to show the worldthe often times difficult-to-understand "true colors" of these recent nostalgic connections. Some examples I saw on the recent feed:

-"Hope you're enjoying the 10th circle hell without your virgins!"
-"Good f#cking riddance!"
-"Let's make sure we give credit to the 'Real' president who helped capture and kill the scumbag- GW Bush. God Bless!" (Or the other "I didn't vote for him, but glad to know the current administration has done something positive!")

(Look. Just so you don't think I'm picking on these people you should know that I'm friends with artists/actors/performers. They're not off the hook, okay? Some of the jokes...are really, really bad.)

I mean...really? It's hard enough to filter or determine tone online. It's hard enough to disregard the political or sometimes manic religious bent of old acquaintinces if they don't align with your own. Keeping with the theme of full disclosure: I hang with liberal minded folk. I voted for Obama. I have hippie sympathies. However I also have conservative leanings. (Although I stopped feeling "Republican" after I realized that I didn't have to always follow the party of my parents and relatives and when I could start making intellligent and informed choices on my own. And private choices, too.)

I consider myself a proud-American. In spite of one of the most awful economic crises to affect our country- In spite of some of the most virulent and vitriolic forms of fighting within our elected government. In spite of decisions being made that are not just contrary and immoral...they're just plain dumb. (Really? Banning same sex marriage? What business is it of yours who does what behind closed doors. Banning spouses and partners who are lousy in the sack? Let's see what kind of hoopla THAT would stir up!) No, I choose to maintain a stance of optimism, faith, and humor. My patriotism, my dedication to my home country falls in the place of being a supporter of those who are our protectors- a few of whom are my friends. Of being respectful to others in their beliefs and opinions. To never fall into a trap of forgetfullness, or complancency. To believe in a changing and vibrant America.

I have never maintained the belief that peace is a possibility throughout the world. Even in times that I've personally considered peaceful domestically- well let's face it... there are still some unbelieavably rotten people in the world. People who fight. Who can't stand their station in life. So they use guns. They steal. They burn. They hurt. The world is too complex to assume that everyone can fall into a business model of peace/love/understanding. (in other words: 'MERIKA!)However if we remain at peace with our individual selves first. And spread it outward with how we treat each other. Our neighbors. Our loved ones. Our families. The one's that we may not understand but people who deserve our respect, regardless of their background.

In my house- We don't celebrate a death, even a symbolic one. We won't celebrate the death of an enemy. We can (and do) acknowledge their passing in the most respectful way possible- By remembering the actions and atrocities that brought them up to their falling. By remembering that there can and may still be those out their to follow their path. And to remember and give tribute to those who have been lost or suffered pain and loss through the actions and orders of that one person. And to accept that as a rule The only answer is humility, peace, and to ultimately choose life.

‎"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that." Martin Luther King Jr. (Thanks, Moda. See? The smarter one's always find a better quote)