Bacherlordom, Day 1. Here's the plan.

Okay so I'm left to my own devices. Yeah. What? Moda is on her big annual road trip w/DBs and they're heading out to the Maine-vein! (Staying w/CRT at the summer camp that they run. Climbing towers. Mountain Bikes. Hiking trails. I'm hoping this isn't like the summer camp memories I have from movies like "Meatballs" or "Wet Hot American Summer" but since it's way into pre-season I'm more worried about frostbite or rain-soaked campfires as opposed to the rival campers from across the lake vying for their affections)

That being said...wow. I finally get her back for a protracted period of time after her theatre marathon and I'm here at home. Soooo I figured I'd regale you with tales on how a monoganimal boy takes care of himself. (Sorry that I can regale you with Don Draper-ian exploits for those who like living vicariously. I just don't/can't play that game. What I do promise is that-hopefully- it won't be lame posts like..."Stayed in and watched 'Rapid Fire' again. It was okay. Tomorrow I'll be making gin and tonics...with ORANGE JUICE and watching 'Strange Brew'. I mean...I don't get the traffic on this site I used to so I hope I don't scare any more faithful readers off. Apparently all 3 of you.)

So I'll give you all the heads up and try to keep these short-ish. You've been warned. I don't eat well when another person doesn't cook for me.


We had our low-key send off last night with Moda making some delicious pad-Thai and then watched "Mad Men" (yay) and "Time Traveler's Weef" (Skip. Or apparently I have no soul) and I slept my first bachelor night in a year.

I'm doing OT at the office, and after we had a delicious catered "employee appreciation" from Holy Land Deli (I ended up explaining to people who were concerned about the falafel balls that it was really kind of like "Middle Eastern Hush Puppies") I was excited at the prospect of the amount of leftovers we had. To the tune of 8-9 pans of spiced grilled chicken, lamb, rice, and hummus. (Did I bring tupperware to work today? You know damn right I did.)

Anticipating a Middle-Eastern breakfast, I came in early armed with the knowledge that at least my gastro-intestinal needs would be met. Not so much. Housecleaning emptied the employee fridge. 8-10 pans of perfectly good food? Tossed. Baby P? Heartbrok...Pissed the righteous f#ck off.

So I worked and hit the 'Bow for some goodies. Breakfast ended up being-

1) A Clif Peanut Butter Chocolate Bar and
2) An on-sale bag of fake Lobster Meat

Clearly, bachelordom spreads fast than Ebola.

I hit the gym for some rehab (Finally. A proper leg/shoulder/arm and back rehab workout on the extension machine and foam roller. After a lengthy sauna and a hot hot hot shower I could touch my toes! I felt like an ambulatory human again, even for a little while.)

I managed a HD trip for some more cedar mulch (HEY! 5 bags for $10!!! Only until tomorrow!) and some potting soil and managed to get home to plant my potted pansies. (And why with the "Pansy"? They're hearty. Thrive in sun and shade. Why not "Kick-Ass McGoo's!"?) Well. My deck looks a little nicer.

Dinner is an egg white omelet with asparagus, soy cheese, marinated tofu, and spinach*. Basically what I have in the fridge with the hope that I can get through my Egg Beaters before they expire. I'd do it for breakfast tomorrow, but that defeats my weekly bachelor goals. WHICH ARE!

1- See some theatre. Moda and I were frassin' that there were a bunch of shows we wanted to see so I figured I'd try to make sure my actor-card was punched and do my part to support local theatre. I know tonight I'm gonna try and see "Relatively Speaking" at TRP. My buddies A and D are in it and Moda already caught a preview so I hope that I can make it. Otherwise I know I'm gonna see "Our Country's...okay" (Starting Gate's last show. Sniff) on Monday for PWYC and tomorrow? Well, we'll see. It'll be either "Queens of Burley-Q" at the History or I wait for the evening to see if the BNI has any shows a-playin. The rest of the week? Who knows.

2-I'm going to get a breakfast sandwich tomorrow morning at Subway if it kills me. I have no time or patience to try and do it during the week (I make my own work breakfast, folks) and even though I could cobble the accotrements together to make the same thing at home, I'd like to see what the fuss is over their "egg-white on an english muffin prepared by a sandwich artist" Breakfast sammy is like. Don't judge me, monkeys.

3- I've taken the week off post-race and I'm going to start race training again tomorrow. maybe 4.5 or 5 miles. Who knows. I may try and actively scamper out to BC to hit USA for some karate style action. I'm rusty. My back has been so f#cked up that even trying a front kick makes my knee buckle. Who knows. Could be fun. Could be damaging.

4-Drive out to BP. Dad was apprehensive when I mentioned my desire to flit through my hometown, but the closing of Brookdale has got me kind of nostaligic. Not a very progressive feeling, sure, but that's part of my make-up. Drop a carnation off at Eric's grave and say "hi" to the lamb. Traipse up Brooklyn Blvd. Stop at "Rocky's" or "Blondie's" for a slice or a salad. I dunno. Maybe I'll call the Gay Burrito and see if he's game. Leave an old man to his memories, for pities sake.

5- Finish class. My BNI classes (officially) end on Tuesday with our "performance" slated for Saturday. Anyone want to watch free student Improv, traipse down to the BNW. I won't give out the time unless you're serious. One of my classmates is s#itting kittens. Be nice.

6- See a flick on my own. "Nightmare" just opened and I have a jones to see either "Kick-Ass" or "The Losers". Which will I pick? I don't know.

There it is. Sorry I won't have exciting stories to post regaling you about my afternoon at BJ's for "Nickel Lap Dances from 3-6pm but I hope that my telling you what I eat/imbibe (Ooo...does this Chianti pair nicely with my microwaved Boca Burger? Should I do the fat-free Bean Burrito with Guiness or an ale?) will bring you amusement while I'm imposing a sort of house arrest.

For your amusement.



*Feel free to add sliced garlic and diced green onion/tomato if you're ambitious.

Heat small skillet to medium and spray with Pam. Add tofu, then cut up asparagus...wait a minute...garlic (DON'T LET IT BURN!) then spinach (and tomato) last. Simultaneously, spray a larger pan and let it heat up while this nonsense is happening. Once you've gotten around to seeing if the spinach is wilting a little, the large pan (on medium-medium high) should be hot enough. Add the egg-white Egg Beater (Or regular) to the pan until it starts to set. (Move the pan around the burner if it doesn't heat evenly) Once set, add the cheese, then add the veggie mix to one end of the omelet. Check the corners with your turner then flip and press the top. Turn the entire thing (try not to brown it) and transfer to plate. Add pepper, salt, or hot sauce to taste.