Why don't we celebrate this?
nopantsday.com
May 2nd
Oh right, baby P. EVERY day is no pants day to you, isn't it?
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Saturday, May 26, 2007
A day late, but...Happy Birthday
Happy Birthday Star Wars!!! (*Thanks to the photoshop mastery of Lando CalrissIan. Please note Mo-da in the background)I started a nostalgic thread on the old Frassboard when I remembered that it was the 30th anniversary of the saga. I blathered on about how we sat through it twice in the theatre. How we had the toys. How it really affected the way big brother and I acted and played, and eventually our pursuit of arts which are martial. How to this day, if there is an automatic door to a building I'll wave my hand in front of the thing to open it. How flashlights became impromptu lightsabers. How the family camper became the Millennium Falcon. And how on one fateful Father's Day a few years back, we all drifted into the TV room at big brothers old house to watch a Sunday airing of Episode one. And my dad cheekily said "Taking you boys to see that film was the worst thing I ever did".
Well the thread blew up, to my untold joy. Some of the mods and posters even started using Star Wars themed "Handles" (ex: "Bri-G-88", "Echelobot", and the aforementioned "Moda" and "Lando CalrissIan". Me? Luke. Doi.)
Geeks? Sure. 32 year old geek, right here. Now if you'll excuse me? Before I drag my tired Wookie buns outside for some trimming and mowing? I need to grab that broom handle and make like a jedi.
May the Force be with you...Frassers.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Quick "WTF?"
Um # one: Dude? I'm all for equal rights. Equally. But, like...Why don't you carry something that can turn into a deadly bo-staff ala' Matt Murdock: "The Daredevil"? http://www.startribune.com/462/story/1186120.html
I'd like to state that this sounds strangely like someone actively searching out a lawsuit. And the fact that you seem to actively want to amass conceal and carry gun permits in varying states is sort of leaning towards that fact. And I hate guns. There. I said it. My only bias regarding this article. Dude...stop. I have ADHD. That doesn't mean I'm suing key-makers because they jingle and cause a distraction every time I HEY! A kitty! http://icanhascheezburger.com/
Um # two: Lemme get this straight. Because the water breach is closer in resemblence to the noble bass, the artistic portrayal of the walleye on the MN state liscense plate is inaccurate. And you wanna bitch? Baby P SEZ! Get. A. Life. M##herf##ker's.
http://www.startribune.com/531/story/1185887.html
I crap you negative. It's antics like the above that make my soul weep.
I'd like to state that this sounds strangely like someone actively searching out a lawsuit. And the fact that you seem to actively want to amass conceal and carry gun permits in varying states is sort of leaning towards that fact. And I hate guns. There. I said it. My only bias regarding this article. Dude...stop. I have ADHD. That doesn't mean I'm suing key-makers because they jingle and cause a distraction every time I HEY! A kitty! http://icanhascheezburger.com/
Um # two: Lemme get this straight. Because the water breach is closer in resemblence to the noble bass, the artistic portrayal of the walleye on the MN state liscense plate is inaccurate. And you wanna bitch? Baby P SEZ! Get. A. Life. M##herf##ker's.
http://www.startribune.com/531/story/1185887.html
I crap you negative. It's antics like the above that make my soul weep.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
She said it better than I...
From Redwright. Regarding new play readings:
"They're like vegetables. You feel like you SHOULD do (read: eat) them."
But guess what? They don't always taste good. Like the one I went to last night? Painful. We actors, who were patiently waiting our turn. And who like good little actor's should, actually read the stupid thing...well we were trying to figure out ways to read it faster so we could get out of there.
Oof.
"They're like vegetables. You feel like you SHOULD do (read: eat) them."
But guess what? They don't always taste good. Like the one I went to last night? Painful. We actors, who were patiently waiting our turn. And who like good little actor's should, actually read the stupid thing...well we were trying to figure out ways to read it faster so we could get out of there.
Oof.
Ahem. An open frass...
Dear corporate psycho's who are currently marketing "Spidey 3". I dig, I really really dig...the need to come up with new products to pimp to the younger set. The days of "just articulated action figures" is nigh on over. You need the new. You need...the better. I understand things like "Spider Man Web Shooters" that shoot non-toxic (Hmmmm) silly string. Or "Venom Goo/Sandman Sand" that some kid could easily replicate with Mrs. Butterworth (Which it looks like) or a simple visit to Elm Creek Park Reserve Beach. I understand plush. Heck, even I have a vintage Spider Man hot wheels car from 1981.
Here's the thing: Neither Spider Man, nor Sandman ride motorcycles in the new movie. So to be selling a set of these rip-cord activated dealies which kids will invariably use to perform makeshift chicken fights on the sidewalks and cul-de-sacs in front of their houses...all for the bargain rate of $17? No mothers. More over, you sell "Spider Man with Scuba Gear" or "Spider Man with Jet Packs" for the younger demographic. But dudes...Seriously? He swings. On. A. Web. The need for a jet pack is superfluous. And there is no way that an arch-nemesis is going to frass around the NYC bay when it's a filthy cess pool of decay, oil, trash, and God knows what else. Well. The need for scuba gear seems rather moot.
Stop now.
My kids, if I ever adopt, will get a red ski mask and blue long johns. And a rope. That's what I had. And gawdammit, if I didn't get stuck up my fair share of tree's. But I was Spider Man. Gawdamn right I was.
Here's the thing: Neither Spider Man, nor Sandman ride motorcycles in the new movie. So to be selling a set of these rip-cord activated dealies which kids will invariably use to perform makeshift chicken fights on the sidewalks and cul-de-sacs in front of their houses...all for the bargain rate of $17? No mothers. More over, you sell "Spider Man with Scuba Gear" or "Spider Man with Jet Packs" for the younger demographic. But dudes...Seriously? He swings. On. A. Web. The need for a jet pack is superfluous. And there is no way that an arch-nemesis is going to frass around the NYC bay when it's a filthy cess pool of decay, oil, trash, and God knows what else. Well. The need for scuba gear seems rather moot.
Stop now.
My kids, if I ever adopt, will get a red ski mask and blue long johns. And a rope. That's what I had. And gawdammit, if I didn't get stuck up my fair share of tree's. But I was Spider Man. Gawdamn right I was.
Time to breath a collective siiiiiigh.
Well...I don't think I got the noble beaver gig. Dag.
The weekend was too toooooo busy, but remarkably enjoyable. It all started on Thursday night into Frrrrriday.
I took a little half day so that I could get home and nap/pop a couple of IB's before the show. We were blessed with good crowds nightly, and the biggest surprise was that 'Bean, AL, Rusty, Portana, and RSvP came out to see us on Friday night. (I shouldn'ta turned my back on RSvP though. One second I was talking to AL, the next he was charmin' Marvin the crowd. Folks, he's been doing this to me since I was in the 8th grade. Frass! And the next moment he was throwing hook kicks over Matty-boom boom's head. In nice dress slacks. My mother would be mortified. I just thought it was cool that he could do'em w/o stretching out first.) Party foul of the evening was that I ripped out the crotch of my jeans while stretching and exacerbated it during fight call. I mean, it was already frayed quite a bit. I just didn't expect my bits to have so much...exposure.
Afterwards, we mosey'ed on over to Dorajar's for a small intimate gathering...and I proceeded to eat my weight in chocolate espresso truffles and cheese. I also got into an argument with Sciple regarding the name of the brutish robot Neanderthal that was the arch-nemesis of Super Joe Commando's Adventure team. (He was absolutely positive it wasn't in the GI Joe canon, and I had too much wine to effectively Google the stupid thing. And I know you wanna know what we nerd-burgers were talking about:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:GIJoeIntruderCommander.jpg
Sats...well I just didn't sleep in like I shoulda. I got up, split with Dorajar and went home to frass around for a bit. (Read: Clean) hadda brief dinner, did another show (Heisse Carl from work, LSA+Tim, Tootchie, etc. I just realized that I could totally be getting my days and audience members mixed up) And Gabpril. At this showza, Chowie's weefie took some awesome pics which I'll post like toast when I get a copy of the CD. Afterwards I went to a HUGE old party at Redwright's, frassed, talked 7th grade politic with Frank, met "The Baron", and again...stayed up way. Too. Late. Snnxxkzzk
Sunds..MAMA's day (Where our illustrious scoundrel was unable to contact his mother, since she and papa-san were in...Lisbon? I think?) Went jogging with Dorajar nice N early before she split to hang with her mama. Attempted another omelette brefkist for myself (With the accompanying veggie sausages and whole wheat English muff-muff. The egg turned out all right, but broke in mid-flip. Frass!!!!!)
It was a great final show in terms of audience-age. KWT and clan were there, as was Phyllis and her mama...so we were guaranteed the most raucous and unique sounding laughter throughout the show (Including the heaviest laughter during the more obscure theatrical references) For yours truly it was a so-so show. Even with 800 mgs of IB, I was at the Zenith of pain in terms of soreness. I f#cked up my kip-up for the first time during the run, I f#cked up the Wizard fight (Again) And in spite of a tutorial from Robby on how to do a helicopter safely & correctly? I managed one rotation before my body just...stopped.
Post show, all the usual infirmaries were there. In addition to re-opening all of my cuts on my foot (And bleeding over my white gi pants) my arms and back started to go numb. And while I was bummed that the show was over (And that my kids didn't show up. ) I knew that a much needed recovery was necessary. See? I'm gonna listen to my body! Don't wanna risk over-training and cause permanent damage, y'know? I wanna get mileage out of the old carcass, and I'd DEFinitely be unable to train at the best of my abilities when I'm injured.
Yeah. What?
Anyway, post show I hit the Tower with some castmates (W/Dorajar and X coming later) where we frassed/listened to bad music (Seriously. To the a$$hat who thought that a Green Day marathon was a good idea? Eat me.) and discussed awful performance art. After we left I ran into the Fabulous Former Fringe director and her hubby, Rik, Foster, etc. where I found out she was at the show as well! Well awesome blossom.
I showered and napped while Morajar made stinky veggie wraps, we read about Moab (I read my script) then headed to hot tubville before hitting the cop bar for karaoke goodness. I don't think that I've laughed that hard in a while- Specially with Carlton singing "Ape Man", Mo doing interpretive dance behind Carol-ton singing "Total Eclipse of the Heart", and 'Bean rocking out some AC/DC. Well scratch that. Some Archie Bunker looking dude sang some Shaggy...And we alllll stared.
Bed. Again. Late.
So to all the folks who missed the show...well to quote the Wizard "ha HA!" You missed out. Fiends.
The weekend was too toooooo busy, but remarkably enjoyable. It all started on Thursday night into Frrrrriday.
I took a little half day so that I could get home and nap/pop a couple of IB's before the show. We were blessed with good crowds nightly, and the biggest surprise was that 'Bean, AL, Rusty, Portana, and RSvP came out to see us on Friday night. (I shouldn'ta turned my back on RSvP though. One second I was talking to AL, the next he was charmin' Marvin the crowd. Folks, he's been doing this to me since I was in the 8th grade. Frass! And the next moment he was throwing hook kicks over Matty-boom boom's head. In nice dress slacks. My mother would be mortified. I just thought it was cool that he could do'em w/o stretching out first.) Party foul of the evening was that I ripped out the crotch of my jeans while stretching and exacerbated it during fight call. I mean, it was already frayed quite a bit. I just didn't expect my bits to have so much...exposure.
Afterwards, we mosey'ed on over to Dorajar's for a small intimate gathering...and I proceeded to eat my weight in chocolate espresso truffles and cheese. I also got into an argument with Sciple regarding the name of the brutish robot Neanderthal that was the arch-nemesis of Super Joe Commando's Adventure team. (He was absolutely positive it wasn't in the GI Joe canon, and I had too much wine to effectively Google the stupid thing. And I know you wanna know what we nerd-burgers were talking about:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:GIJoeIntruderCommander.jpg
Sats...well I just didn't sleep in like I shoulda. I got up, split with Dorajar and went home to frass around for a bit. (Read: Clean) hadda brief dinner, did another show (Heisse Carl from work, LSA+Tim, Tootchie, etc. I just realized that I could totally be getting my days and audience members mixed up) And Gabpril. At this showza, Chowie's weefie took some awesome pics which I'll post like toast when I get a copy of the CD. Afterwards I went to a HUGE old party at Redwright's, frassed, talked 7th grade politic with Frank, met "The Baron", and again...stayed up way. Too. Late. Snnxxkzzk
Sunds..MAMA's day (Where our illustrious scoundrel was unable to contact his mother, since she and papa-san were in...Lisbon? I think?) Went jogging with Dorajar nice N early before she split to hang with her mama. Attempted another omelette brefkist for myself (With the accompanying veggie sausages and whole wheat English muff-muff. The egg turned out all right, but broke in mid-flip. Frass!!!!!)
It was a great final show in terms of audience-age. KWT and clan were there, as was Phyllis and her mama...so we were guaranteed the most raucous and unique sounding laughter throughout the show (Including the heaviest laughter during the more obscure theatrical references) For yours truly it was a so-so show. Even with 800 mgs of IB, I was at the Zenith of pain in terms of soreness. I f#cked up my kip-up for the first time during the run, I f#cked up the Wizard fight (Again) And in spite of a tutorial from Robby on how to do a helicopter safely & correctly? I managed one rotation before my body just...stopped.
Post show, all the usual infirmaries were there. In addition to re-opening all of my cuts on my foot (And bleeding over my white gi pants) my arms and back started to go numb. And while I was bummed that the show was over (And that my kids didn't show up. ) I knew that a much needed recovery was necessary. See? I'm gonna listen to my body! Don't wanna risk over-training and cause permanent damage, y'know? I wanna get mileage out of the old carcass, and I'd DEFinitely be unable to train at the best of my abilities when I'm injured.
Yeah. What?
Anyway, post show I hit the Tower with some castmates (W/Dorajar and X coming later) where we frassed/listened to bad music (Seriously. To the a$$hat who thought that a Green Day marathon was a good idea? Eat me.) and discussed awful performance art. After we left I ran into the Fabulous Former Fringe director and her hubby, Rik, Foster, etc. where I found out she was at the show as well! Well awesome blossom.
I showered and napped while Morajar made stinky veggie wraps, we read about Moab (I read my script) then headed to hot tubville before hitting the cop bar for karaoke goodness. I don't think that I've laughed that hard in a while- Specially with Carlton singing "Ape Man", Mo doing interpretive dance behind Carol-ton singing "Total Eclipse of the Heart", and 'Bean rocking out some AC/DC. Well scratch that. Some Archie Bunker looking dude sang some Shaggy...And we alllll stared.
Bed. Again. Late.
So to all the folks who missed the show...well to quote the Wizard "ha HA!" You missed out. Fiends.
Friday, May 11, 2007
Good Lord...
'member that old Beaver audition I was frassin' about?
I got a callback.
Smacking forhead now.
I got a callback.
Smacking forhead now.
My kids...
The cast of Centennial's production of "Kung Fu Hamlet", director TLC, Moi, and the original cast of "KFH" + "Team Voice" member Ryan K. 5/10/2007
Thanks for the Picture, Chowser. Welcome home Gabpril. And good luck with the rest of the run, kidlets. Make me proud.
ps: Ya can't tell, but some of the cast members are wearing bandana's with the Mexican flag on it. I thought that was kinda funny.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
No shame...No Mama
I just auditioned to be a beaver for the MN state lottery.
I...
No.
See, I've done some weird ass things as an actor. My favorite scrap of paper that came from an acting prof who was grading scenes said "Take Bigger Risks!!!". I like that. And I like to think that I do from time to time. I have no problems with (To my mother's everlasting shame) getting buck on stage. Beating myself up, literally...with no regard to personal safety, every performance of GMIKFTH.
So here's me, at the casting agent...listening to all the dumb jokes being said outside which I'm pretty sure they'd all heard (I stood by quietly, for a change. Reading the storyboard/directions. "Start crouched. Beaver-like. Slate. Place 'stick' in your mouth. 'Beaver' (dog) paddle toward the camera. Drop stick in appropriate spot on the dam. Look to other beavers who are flanking you for approval".
I'm paraphrasing...a titch...but that was word-for-word the direction.
So I'm crouched down, stripped to my waist (See bit about nudity) listening to the camera guy tell me what to do. I do it. And I'm done. W/in 45 seconds of slating my name.
I left feeling...weird. The other beavers-to-be were a titch more robust than I was, and in spite of not being in tip-top shape right now I still wound up feeling like the "runt-beaver"..."pygmy-beaver"..."beaver-midgie". I left thinking "What if I got this? I go through life not watching much TV, so I miss a lot of local spots that have actor's I know. If I get this...I'd be one of those actors. And forevermore, I wouldn't be Spider-man....I'd be 'Beaver-Boy'...Do you want that, P?"
I shit you little I do. Heh. Fah. Knee.
I...
No.
See, I've done some weird ass things as an actor. My favorite scrap of paper that came from an acting prof who was grading scenes said "Take Bigger Risks!!!". I like that. And I like to think that I do from time to time. I have no problems with (To my mother's everlasting shame) getting buck on stage. Beating myself up, literally...with no regard to personal safety, every performance of GMIKFTH.
So here's me, at the casting agent...listening to all the dumb jokes being said outside which I'm pretty sure they'd all heard (I stood by quietly, for a change. Reading the storyboard/directions. "Start crouched. Beaver-like. Slate. Place 'stick' in your mouth. 'Beaver' (dog) paddle toward the camera. Drop stick in appropriate spot on the dam. Look to other beavers who are flanking you for approval".
I'm paraphrasing...a titch...but that was word-for-word the direction.
So I'm crouched down, stripped to my waist (See bit about nudity) listening to the camera guy tell me what to do. I do it. And I'm done. W/in 45 seconds of slating my name.
I left feeling...weird. The other beavers-to-be were a titch more robust than I was, and in spite of not being in tip-top shape right now I still wound up feeling like the "runt-beaver"..."pygmy-beaver"..."beaver-midgie". I left thinking "What if I got this? I go through life not watching much TV, so I miss a lot of local spots that have actor's I know. If I get this...I'd be one of those actors. And forevermore, I wouldn't be Spider-man....I'd be 'Beaver-Boy'...Do you want that, P?"
I shit you little I do. Heh. Fah. Knee.
Monday, May 07, 2007
Soundbits, du jour...
From Sunday's Matinee...
JennyBenny, in response to the comment that she was so cute people wanted to "Eat her up"...
"I prefer to think of myself as 'voluptuous"...
Today, at the High School rehearsal. TLC asked Rosencrantz:
"Kirby? Went you come out I want you to give me a little more head..."
Not the thing you want to say to a crowd of 15-18 year olds. Or 32 year olds for that matter.
JennyBenny, in response to the comment that she was so cute people wanted to "Eat her up"...
"I prefer to think of myself as 'voluptuous"...
Today, at the High School rehearsal. TLC asked Rosencrantz:
"Kirby? Went you come out I want you to give me a little more head..."
Not the thing you want to say to a crowd of 15-18 year olds. Or 32 year olds for that matter.
What happens...
When you do martial arts is that sometimes you get "geared up" after sparring or a really intense class. Add the endorphin rush of live theatre and you have a cocktail for pure...terror? Just the other night Kiseung was gesturing with his ciggie in hand while Jabas and I left the theatre. He straight arm gestured toward my face and I did sort of a limbo pose back to avoid getting my eye burned out. Normally, I'd have fallen on my keister but I was up and cursing at him for trying to make me finish the run with an eye-patch.
Apparently I'm amped up in my sleep too, as I elbowed Dorajar in the head not once but twice last night. The second time woke both of us up after the thud of elbow hitting face was more than we could bear (She started slapping wildly after it happened)
She's going to need to start wearing sparring gear to bed.
Now, if that ain't a hearty endorsement to see my show, I don't know what is!
Apparently I'm amped up in my sleep too, as I elbowed Dorajar in the head not once but twice last night. The second time woke both of us up after the thud of elbow hitting face was more than we could bear (She started slapping wildly after it happened)
She's going to need to start wearing sparring gear to bed.
Now, if that ain't a hearty endorsement to see my show, I don't know what is!
Proud O' my kids...
Oooooo, so many posts in one day? Making up for lost time, are we? Pbblbhbsppbblssst!
So, I begrudgingly went out to the High School for rehearsal this last Saturday. To say I was not looking forward to it would be an understatement. I was still wicked tired and trying to catch up from sleep deprivation due to midnight movie showing. (Yeah, yeah...I danced, and now I have to pay the piper. I don't remember it taking so long to recover from getting off my normal schedule!)
I was sore, and feeling severely under-worked out as well as being incapable of getting up outta bed to even jog.
I wanted to go frass around the farmer's market, but couldn't.
No, instead I had put it in my mind that I was going to spend the better part of the morning through the late afternoon (Ugh, before needing to speed my ass back home to grab dinner early enough to not feel "full" before the show...) Pure optimism, right here.
What I got was a surprise... for a couple things.
1- The kids were milling around in their gi-costumes and I had to give them a belt-tying tutorial. (Too funny)
2- The fights. Okay, to be sure they aren't martial artists. Cool? But they were up their sellin' it, kung-fu'ing each other. I mean like they'd really really worked on the stuff I'd shown them. For the first time I could just watch and let'em go. (And props to my Ophelia who sells things like nobodies business)
3-Subsequently, I was able to clean up/add some bits in order to bring the funny.
4- I had forgotten that Polonius still didn't know how to do Tornado kicks. (Something I was reluctant to show him and deliberately left it out of the 'Ography to put in something more tertiary for him) He balked and said he at least wanted to try to learn it. Okay, cool. So I gave him the footwork he needed to "travel" and promised to work it later...which I didn't remember doing. So I gave it to him and bless his heart he gave it a whirl. He's no Walker, but he got the jist of it. So it stays.
So yeah. If you're free this Thursday/Friday/Saturday (NO FORGIVENESS FOR YOU IF YOU MISS "GMIKFTH"!!!) , in the North Eastery suburbs, and have $6 lying around go support my kids. They're working their butts off.
So, I begrudgingly went out to the High School for rehearsal this last Saturday. To say I was not looking forward to it would be an understatement. I was still wicked tired and trying to catch up from sleep deprivation due to midnight movie showing. (Yeah, yeah...I danced, and now I have to pay the piper. I don't remember it taking so long to recover from getting off my normal schedule!)
I was sore, and feeling severely under-worked out as well as being incapable of getting up outta bed to even jog.
I wanted to go frass around the farmer's market, but couldn't.
No, instead I had put it in my mind that I was going to spend the better part of the morning through the late afternoon (Ugh, before needing to speed my ass back home to grab dinner early enough to not feel "full" before the show...) Pure optimism, right here.
What I got was a surprise... for a couple things.
1- The kids were milling around in their gi-costumes and I had to give them a belt-tying tutorial. (Too funny)
2- The fights. Okay, to be sure they aren't martial artists. Cool? But they were up their sellin' it, kung-fu'ing each other. I mean like they'd really really worked on the stuff I'd shown them. For the first time I could just watch and let'em go. (And props to my Ophelia who sells things like nobodies business)
3-Subsequently, I was able to clean up/add some bits in order to bring the funny.
4- I had forgotten that Polonius still didn't know how to do Tornado kicks. (Something I was reluctant to show him and deliberately left it out of the 'Ography to put in something more tertiary for him) He balked and said he at least wanted to try to learn it. Okay, cool. So I gave him the footwork he needed to "travel" and promised to work it later...which I didn't remember doing. So I gave it to him and bless his heart he gave it a whirl. He's no Walker, but he got the jist of it. So it stays.
So yeah. If you're free this Thursday/Friday/Saturday (NO FORGIVENESS FOR YOU IF YOU MISS "GMIKFTH"!!!) , in the North Eastery suburbs, and have $6 lying around go support my kids. They're working their butts off.
Baby P's "Spider-Man 3" review. (SPOILER'S!!!)
I repeat, spoilers. I feel that anyone who know's me also know's I have kind of a vested interest in the franchise due to the fact that at some point and time during my youth (And...cough cough...partly into adulthood) I believed myself to be the friendly neighborhood hombre' arana. Going so far as to carrying my "mask" in my backpack to school and concealing my costume (re: Underoo's) under my school clothes. Although unless it's a movie quality costume do not, I repeat, do NOT buy me Spider Man schwag. I don't want it. Seriously now. Put back the pen.
That being said, I love the franchise. And even the 3rd installment which most folks/critics/fans alike agree is probably the weakest still holds a place in my heart, and a future spot on my DVD rack. (And Sony wants 3 more movies? I'm a big fan of saying enough is enough. And that they really need to re-examine the series to avoid future mis-steps. For real)
I'd also like to warn you that this post is going to explore my thoughts on what went wrong, what coulda been done better, and moments that really endeared me to the movie.
Ergo, it's going to be long. (Kiped from another thread I'm part of)
So there was some fumbling etc. It was IMHO still an entertaining franchise movie. Not perfect, but entertaining if you dug the first two. (Unlike X3 where you really, REALLY hadda like the franchise to even glom a modicum of enjoyment out of it.) Ignoreg the hokey dialogue (Which, to be sure, can and should be forgiven. Why? Like Dorajar says, it's a comic book movie. You want meat in your characterizations rent "Notes on a Scandal" or some shit.) The comic book film industry has started making strides since it's original "death" (A cancer that started around the Schumacher mis-managing of the "Batman" franchise and ended with Bat-nippled Clooney in "Batman and Throbbin") It re-started (after Horror/Sci-fi movies were experiencing a resurgence) with a mix of horror-sci fi-comic: Blade.
Then X-Men (A film that we all were hope hope hoping would work...and did) Employed a director with some cred (Bryan Singer) mad actors/unknowns (McKellan, Stewart, Jackman, et.al) And came across as all right. When "Spidey 1" came out (Originally James Cameron was attached with DiCaprio and a reported Winslet as Peter and MJ respectively. I like DiCaprio...somewhat...as an actor...but that woulda been way horseshit. My choice for Parker was the younger brother of Eliza Dushku in "Bring it On", Jesse what's his butt. He woulda worked.) It was a great hero "origin" story. Really great. The biggest nut-rub was taking an iconoclastic villain (Green Goblin) and making him a Might Morphin Power Ranger. Now, I love me some Raimi. I do. Even "The Quick and The Dead". And I can buy trying to ground the characters in more of a "reality" by giving them something that resembles a "practical" explanation to their costuming rather than a rubber mask or make-up, but come on. Power. Rangers. Bad-guy. Still. A good flick, with decent box-office/effects/ACTING...guaranteeing a sequel
Part 2- Great film. From the beginning to the end, and again IMHO the best in the franchise. More great seasoned actor's (Molina, Dylan Baker, Donna MURPHY in a supporting role...etc.) And some top-shelf Academy Award winning effects work (Um. Hello? The "El" fight? Oof.) There of course, were a few quibbles. I thought that the whole "psychological" problem of Spidey's powers disappearing was akin to a case of a guy who can't get a boner 'cause he's "psyching himself out" ("Oh. What Pete? Can't 'Shoot' The old web shooters during crunch time???" Yeah.) And lastly...do you have to show your secret identity to everyone and their cat? 20+ train commuters. The main bad guy. And lastly...your future g/f? Didn't you have the whole mask bit to keep your loved ones safe? Dude...SECRET identity, yo. Call Bruce Wayne, line 2. The blinking red phone next to the inconspicuous bust that flips up to reveal the switch to the bat cave. Shhhhhh) Regardless, my favorite. Still a good movie, that has great memories of my first Spidey midnight showing with Lattery, Kaiser, Jabas, et.al.
Now part 3...Okay, so I bogarted some comments from other reviews (i.e. Too many villains/supporting characters to explore which watered down the entirety of the experience). Overall, not a bad bad film. There were GREAT action sequences, even from the 1st shots of him swinging in the city. I dug that it was Peter Parker fighting the Goblin and not in his costume. His character in the black suit (Chris Gaines..btw...Emo Pete...btw. You guys rule) was cool... So was his bar fight (C'mon. Little Peter tossing the big bad bouncers? And tell me that hearing everyone in the theatre gasp when he hit MJ wasn't kinda like "Whoa...that came outta no where") The only things they explored in a little detail was his decent from arrogance, to evil with any degree of thought. (Or Eddie. More on that later) There were Great villains too! As. Stand alones. See, I can see multiple "costumed" villains. Like, as Spidey's world opens up so does his Rogues Gallery. (Ex: What if it opened with "rash of crazy criminals stalk NYC" and there's a quick fight of Spidey fighting, oh, the Beetle. Or the Vulture. Just 2-3 minutes of action. Nothing to detract from the main plot/villain. Just enough to say that his problems exist outside of bank robbers, fires, and kids crossing the street too soon) Let's look at this for a sec in the order they clashed:
Goblin, Goblin jr, Lil' Gobby buck buck. Okay. Cool. I dig it. Sooooo, Harry coming out ala' an Abercrombie model from the green gas tube was...a little homo-erotice. But whatever. They established he's doing what he's doing. So. Is he a "Goblin"? Sure, comic Harry took up his dad's mantle. But this one is a clear departure from the "Green Goblin" (A nickname JJJ gave him in the first movie.) To a guy wearing a removable ski-mask and SWAT suit with a katana and an amalgamation of Batman/Predator's glove. Okay, he's got the bombs and the razor bats...cool. But he can't be Goblin jr. He doesn't look like the Goblin. He didn't take his dad's glider. (Um...hey. That's a skateboard, right? How did you make that again, Harry? Weren't you the durp-durp who schlepped with Peter for study-help? Just take your dad's fucking glider and we'll believe you can ride the stoopid thing) And maybe, if we're keeping in alignment with the first movie, a similar...mask? Maybe you found a prototype (As we had hoped seeing the old mask, a silvery one, and then...your paintball mask. Nope. Get your guns, we're spuh-LATballing.) Your fights were made of awesome, I won't lie. Just keep in line with the canon, okay? Moving on.
Sandman. A good villain. One who the comic Spidey beat with...wait for it...a vaccuum. So, cool creation/effects (Although I commented that when he was "re-created" with the sand it looked more like clumping cat-litter. Oops. There goes my suspension of disbelief) Soooooo, Okay. Mo and I frassed about this today. Enough is enough with the sympathetic villain. (Or, conflicted villain like the last two movies. We get it. Bad guys aren't all bad...they're MADE...right Mr. Raimi?) Redemption is a great selling point in these movies: Spidey in the first, Doc Ock in the 2nd...and Gob...whoever in the 3rd. Sooooo having Tiny Tim as his kid and the (Where have you been Theresa Russell? You still look great for...what...102?) wife be bitchy, he's auto-sympth. This is a case where he coulda been left out entirely. En. Tirely. Make him the aforementioned small-villain. Or another movie. Or a tv show. This was the effects team bogarting shit from everyone's favorite "The Mummy" to put in their own movie. And I'm sorry...as cool as the fight scenes and effects were? They shoulda made way for this guy...right here:
Venom. I think that Topher did some good shit here. He played his part, and he played it well. Arrogant (W/Peter et.al) 'Smarmy (W/Betty Brant) Delusional (W/ Gwen) and unethical. Showing him periodically through the movie then showhorning his villain in (A very well done...again...IMHO...effects job. His crawling on the wall conversation w/Sandman was top-shelf) This character has become HUGE w/in the last 22 years of the 1st introduction of the symbiote during "Secret Wars". Powerful. A match for Spider-Man. Undetectable by his Spider-Sense (Oh. Where was that, btw, when Har-Gob knocked you on your ass?) He woulda been his own, complete, movie.
Instead, we get Peter's repentence...Topher's transforming...and we has to sit through some honky bullshit for 20 minutes (Ham-fisted "Peter is bad" or "Peter is Denny Terrio"...or "Peter is this..." Btw. Why didn't they go into what Harry said to MJ before she lied to Peter and said "I wanna break up with you"? I mean it'll be on the DVD, but a quick "I will kill Peter, Aunt May, and your family if you say anything..."blah blah villain dialogue. Demasking. Oh. Right. ) In keeping with the theme of "everybody knows Spidey", we're left with a VILLAIN fluffing off into the night. Who know's his secret. Grrrr. I mean, DRAMA would have been Venom dumping a maskless Peter at the feet of JJJ. (Or close to him) but no. Double Grrrrr.
Real quick-like...I love Bruce Campbell. That is all. Okay. The sub-characters I'll try and keep short.
MJ? Meh. I never agreed with the casting, but accepted and embraced that it would be the Kristen Dunce. Okay. Betty Brant was always great as the far-away flirt (Um...quick. "40 year old Virgin" reference: "What's wrong with her underwear?"/"Ummm...They aren't in my mouth!") But Gwen. Gwen Stacy. I read a review that Dunce is fine. Cute. What ev. But MJ is supposed to be a super-model pretty, and no-nonsense. Having Gwen, um, "glow"? Is that right? And to also be super smart. And she's the super-model? BEEP! Wrong answer. They could just as easily done a Pete and MJ break up, Pete hooks up with her to see what's great in the world when BOOM! She's killed. Why? She's killed in the comics, yo. Not graphically. She's killed when Pete is doing what he does best to save people. And it was such a BIG DEAL in the comics because unlike other Marvel properties- She didn't come back. (Well, clones don't count.) It was what worked about the last one: Parker was freaked out because no one like him and all he wanted to do was help. This time it was such an abrupt 180 that he had to make the choice himself when her death would have had such a greater dramatic catalyst. But no. She lived. To be pretty. And Howard. And PP went back to MJ...even though after staring at Jessica Biel (Sorry...went back to the preview for "I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry") Gwen Stacy. A character never fully realized. Even though he went back to the girl couldn't even be honest that she was shit-canned for not being able to sing. (And. Um. Stick with Theatre. No reputable Jazz Club would put a failed B'Way star to work. They would, just not one who couldn't sing.)
And then? Peter.
Peter Peter Peter. Well, you got to wear the ab-airbrushed costume more, sans mask. Which in my mind brings back seeing a half-nude Kenneth Brannagh in "Frankenstein" with his air-brushed abs on his bare-body. We get that it's hard to stay in the shape like you were in the first two. We do. But do you, James Franco, and Topher Grace all need to spend so much time out of the things that hide your secret identities? Does everything HAVE to be a great reveal. Parker (And subsequent villains) losing their masks was a big deal in the comics...(See the current story line "Civil War"). Hell, in Mexico if you are a Lucha Libre fighter and your mask is removed it's the HUGEST insult you can endure. And gah...Yes. Okay. I'll admit, and I'm a staunch defender of mainstream movies that a majority think are bad because I find a few good bits and cling on like my life depends on it. (The Star Wars Prequel franchise, X3, etc...) But. Fuck. Dancing? Musicals? In this? Weren't we frassin' about what a joke a Spider Man musical would in fact be? The musical numbers were what I began referring to as my "pee breaks". I knew I wouldn't miss much. And how you came across the Venom suit was kinda lame. Oh, a meteor hitches a ride on your mo-ped? Lets keep the film moving folks. Again, if they did a "VENOM" and "Venom" alone movie they probably could have done a better back story. Instead, they bogart an installment of "Creepshow" ("The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill") as the genesis of the symbiote. (btw- I think that it was also a little "pat" how he magically figured out how to remove it...no?) So yeah. I liked it. I'll by the DVD. You should see it on a big screen (matinee) really. And yes, I'm tired and invested way too much time into thinking about this. xo
ps: I was interviewed by Fox 9 news immediately after the movie. Let's just say that I'm not at my most...articulate...at 3am.
That being said, I love the franchise. And even the 3rd installment which most folks/critics/fans alike agree is probably the weakest still holds a place in my heart, and a future spot on my DVD rack. (And Sony wants 3 more movies? I'm a big fan of saying enough is enough. And that they really need to re-examine the series to avoid future mis-steps. For real)
I'd also like to warn you that this post is going to explore my thoughts on what went wrong, what coulda been done better, and moments that really endeared me to the movie.
Ergo, it's going to be long. (Kiped from another thread I'm part of)
So there was some fumbling etc. It was IMHO still an entertaining franchise movie. Not perfect, but entertaining if you dug the first two. (Unlike X3 where you really, REALLY hadda like the franchise to even glom a modicum of enjoyment out of it.) Ignoreg the hokey dialogue (Which, to be sure, can and should be forgiven. Why? Like Dorajar says, it's a comic book movie. You want meat in your characterizations rent "Notes on a Scandal" or some shit.) The comic book film industry has started making strides since it's original "death" (A cancer that started around the Schumacher mis-managing of the "Batman" franchise and ended with Bat-nippled Clooney in "Batman and Throbbin") It re-started (after Horror/Sci-fi movies were experiencing a resurgence) with a mix of horror-sci fi-comic: Blade.
Then X-Men (A film that we all were hope hope hoping would work...and did) Employed a director with some cred (Bryan Singer) mad actors/unknowns (McKellan, Stewart, Jackman, et.al) And came across as all right. When "Spidey 1" came out (Originally James Cameron was attached with DiCaprio and a reported Winslet as Peter and MJ respectively. I like DiCaprio...somewhat...as an actor...but that woulda been way horseshit. My choice for Parker was the younger brother of Eliza Dushku in "Bring it On", Jesse what's his butt. He woulda worked.) It was a great hero "origin" story. Really great. The biggest nut-rub was taking an iconoclastic villain (Green Goblin) and making him a Might Morphin Power Ranger. Now, I love me some Raimi. I do. Even "The Quick and The Dead". And I can buy trying to ground the characters in more of a "reality" by giving them something that resembles a "practical" explanation to their costuming rather than a rubber mask or make-up, but come on. Power. Rangers. Bad-guy. Still. A good flick, with decent box-office/effects/ACTING...guaranteeing a sequel
Part 2- Great film. From the beginning to the end, and again IMHO the best in the franchise. More great seasoned actor's (Molina, Dylan Baker, Donna MURPHY in a supporting role...etc.) And some top-shelf Academy Award winning effects work (Um. Hello? The "El" fight? Oof.) There of course, were a few quibbles. I thought that the whole "psychological" problem of Spidey's powers disappearing was akin to a case of a guy who can't get a boner 'cause he's "psyching himself out" ("Oh. What Pete? Can't 'Shoot' The old web shooters during crunch time???" Yeah.) And lastly...do you have to show your secret identity to everyone and their cat? 20+ train commuters. The main bad guy. And lastly...your future g/f? Didn't you have the whole mask bit to keep your loved ones safe? Dude...SECRET identity, yo. Call Bruce Wayne, line 2. The blinking red phone next to the inconspicuous bust that flips up to reveal the switch to the bat cave. Shhhhhh) Regardless, my favorite. Still a good movie, that has great memories of my first Spidey midnight showing with Lattery, Kaiser, Jabas, et.al.
Now part 3...Okay, so I bogarted some comments from other reviews (i.e. Too many villains/supporting characters to explore which watered down the entirety of the experience). Overall, not a bad bad film. There were GREAT action sequences, even from the 1st shots of him swinging in the city. I dug that it was Peter Parker fighting the Goblin and not in his costume. His character in the black suit (Chris Gaines..btw...Emo Pete...btw. You guys rule) was cool... So was his bar fight (C'mon. Little Peter tossing the big bad bouncers? And tell me that hearing everyone in the theatre gasp when he hit MJ wasn't kinda like "Whoa...that came outta no where") The only things they explored in a little detail was his decent from arrogance, to evil with any degree of thought. (Or Eddie. More on that later) There were Great villains too! As. Stand alones. See, I can see multiple "costumed" villains. Like, as Spidey's world opens up so does his Rogues Gallery. (Ex: What if it opened with "rash of crazy criminals stalk NYC" and there's a quick fight of Spidey fighting, oh, the Beetle. Or the Vulture. Just 2-3 minutes of action. Nothing to detract from the main plot/villain. Just enough to say that his problems exist outside of bank robbers, fires, and kids crossing the street too soon) Let's look at this for a sec in the order they clashed:
Goblin, Goblin jr, Lil' Gobby buck buck. Okay. Cool. I dig it. Sooooo, Harry coming out ala' an Abercrombie model from the green gas tube was...a little homo-erotice. But whatever. They established he's doing what he's doing. So. Is he a "Goblin"? Sure, comic Harry took up his dad's mantle. But this one is a clear departure from the "Green Goblin" (A nickname JJJ gave him in the first movie.) To a guy wearing a removable ski-mask and SWAT suit with a katana and an amalgamation of Batman/Predator's glove. Okay, he's got the bombs and the razor bats...cool. But he can't be Goblin jr. He doesn't look like the Goblin. He didn't take his dad's glider. (Um...hey. That's a skateboard, right? How did you make that again, Harry? Weren't you the durp-durp who schlepped with Peter for study-help? Just take your dad's fucking glider and we'll believe you can ride the stoopid thing) And maybe, if we're keeping in alignment with the first movie, a similar...mask? Maybe you found a prototype (As we had hoped seeing the old mask, a silvery one, and then...your paintball mask. Nope. Get your guns, we're spuh-LATballing.) Your fights were made of awesome, I won't lie. Just keep in line with the canon, okay? Moving on.
Sandman. A good villain. One who the comic Spidey beat with...wait for it...a vaccuum. So, cool creation/effects (Although I commented that when he was "re-created" with the sand it looked more like clumping cat-litter. Oops. There goes my suspension of disbelief) Soooooo, Okay. Mo and I frassed about this today. Enough is enough with the sympathetic villain. (Or, conflicted villain like the last two movies. We get it. Bad guys aren't all bad...they're MADE...right Mr. Raimi?) Redemption is a great selling point in these movies: Spidey in the first, Doc Ock in the 2nd...and Gob...whoever in the 3rd. Sooooo having Tiny Tim as his kid and the (Where have you been Theresa Russell? You still look great for...what...102?) wife be bitchy, he's auto-sympth. This is a case where he coulda been left out entirely. En. Tirely. Make him the aforementioned small-villain. Or another movie. Or a tv show. This was the effects team bogarting shit from everyone's favorite "The Mummy" to put in their own movie. And I'm sorry...as cool as the fight scenes and effects were? They shoulda made way for this guy...right here:
Venom. I think that Topher did some good shit here. He played his part, and he played it well. Arrogant (W/Peter et.al) 'Smarmy (W/Betty Brant) Delusional (W/ Gwen) and unethical. Showing him periodically through the movie then showhorning his villain in (A very well done...again...IMHO...effects job. His crawling on the wall conversation w/Sandman was top-shelf) This character has become HUGE w/in the last 22 years of the 1st introduction of the symbiote during "Secret Wars". Powerful. A match for Spider-Man. Undetectable by his Spider-Sense (Oh. Where was that, btw, when Har-Gob knocked you on your ass?) He woulda been his own, complete, movie.
Instead, we get Peter's repentence...Topher's transforming...and we has to sit through some honky bullshit for 20 minutes (Ham-fisted "Peter is bad" or "Peter is Denny Terrio"...or "Peter is this..." Btw. Why didn't they go into what Harry said to MJ before she lied to Peter and said "I wanna break up with you"? I mean it'll be on the DVD, but a quick "I will kill Peter, Aunt May, and your family if you say anything..."blah blah villain dialogue. Demasking. Oh. Right. ) In keeping with the theme of "everybody knows Spidey", we're left with a VILLAIN fluffing off into the night. Who know's his secret. Grrrr. I mean, DRAMA would have been Venom dumping a maskless Peter at the feet of JJJ. (Or close to him) but no. Double Grrrrr.
Real quick-like...I love Bruce Campbell. That is all. Okay. The sub-characters I'll try and keep short.
MJ? Meh. I never agreed with the casting, but accepted and embraced that it would be the Kristen Dunce. Okay. Betty Brant was always great as the far-away flirt (Um...quick. "40 year old Virgin" reference: "What's wrong with her underwear?"/"Ummm...They aren't in my mouth!") But Gwen. Gwen Stacy. I read a review that Dunce is fine. Cute. What ev. But MJ is supposed to be a super-model pretty, and no-nonsense. Having Gwen, um, "glow"? Is that right? And to also be super smart. And she's the super-model? BEEP! Wrong answer. They could just as easily done a Pete and MJ break up, Pete hooks up with her to see what's great in the world when BOOM! She's killed. Why? She's killed in the comics, yo. Not graphically. She's killed when Pete is doing what he does best to save people. And it was such a BIG DEAL in the comics because unlike other Marvel properties- She didn't come back. (Well, clones don't count.) It was what worked about the last one: Parker was freaked out because no one like him and all he wanted to do was help. This time it was such an abrupt 180 that he had to make the choice himself when her death would have had such a greater dramatic catalyst. But no. She lived. To be pretty. And Howard. And PP went back to MJ...even though after staring at Jessica Biel (Sorry...went back to the preview for "I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry") Gwen Stacy. A character never fully realized. Even though he went back to the girl couldn't even be honest that she was shit-canned for not being able to sing. (And. Um. Stick with Theatre. No reputable Jazz Club would put a failed B'Way star to work. They would, just not one who couldn't sing.)
And then? Peter.
Peter Peter Peter. Well, you got to wear the ab-airbrushed costume more, sans mask. Which in my mind brings back seeing a half-nude Kenneth Brannagh in "Frankenstein" with his air-brushed abs on his bare-body. We get that it's hard to stay in the shape like you were in the first two. We do. But do you, James Franco, and Topher Grace all need to spend so much time out of the things that hide your secret identities? Does everything HAVE to be a great reveal. Parker (And subsequent villains) losing their masks was a big deal in the comics...(See the current story line "Civil War"). Hell, in Mexico if you are a Lucha Libre fighter and your mask is removed it's the HUGEST insult you can endure. And gah...Yes. Okay. I'll admit, and I'm a staunch defender of mainstream movies that a majority think are bad because I find a few good bits and cling on like my life depends on it. (The Star Wars Prequel franchise, X3, etc...) But. Fuck. Dancing? Musicals? In this? Weren't we frassin' about what a joke a Spider Man musical would in fact be? The musical numbers were what I began referring to as my "pee breaks". I knew I wouldn't miss much. And how you came across the Venom suit was kinda lame. Oh, a meteor hitches a ride on your mo-ped? Lets keep the film moving folks. Again, if they did a "VENOM" and "Venom" alone movie they probably could have done a better back story. Instead, they bogart an installment of "Creepshow" ("The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill") as the genesis of the symbiote. (btw- I think that it was also a little "pat" how he magically figured out how to remove it...no?) So yeah. I liked it. I'll by the DVD. You should see it on a big screen (matinee) really. And yes, I'm tired and invested way too much time into thinking about this. xo
ps: I was interviewed by Fox 9 news immediately after the movie. Let's just say that I'm not at my most...articulate...at 3am.
Body Check!!! (*)
*Or "how I quit worrying and learned to love the pain"
Doesn't the thread title remind you of day camp/scout camp? 'Member? Whenever you went swimming you had to have a buddy and during random intervals the lifeguard (who looked NOTHING like they did on "Baywatch" would yell "BUDDY CHECK"!!! And you and yer buddy would hold your hands up before they blew the whistle and you could get back to your lake-frass...
No one? What?
Well the show is up and runnin'. Yee Haw. The house have been small, but enthusiastic. And I felt that we finally started to hit our stride on Saturday night in spite of my various attempts at killing my cast. (Chowie walked in to the bad end of the Monk's Spade as I carried it off stage...nearly disemboweling him. Newly gradgitated B-boy Robby took the walking staff to the knuckles like he was in Catholic School during the "Oedipus" sketch. I whacked Shinobi-wan a little too vigorously with a spinning backfist. And lastly I nearly took out the Kat during "Streetfighter" with a well-placed jump spin wheel to the elbow. By the end of the show I was checking to see if there was anyone else who wanted some. And for real, I didn't even have a beer!)
No critics, but some dear folks showed up starting with Joshie on Friday ("I knew you did that stuff...but I didn't know you could DO that stuff!" Warmed my heart) Dorajar and 'Nai on Saturday, and a surprise visit by Ry-Gonn on Sunday. (Please send warmest regards to he and his family. He's going through some ill-gramma frass right now)
So I wanted to post a quick inventory of ailments that comes from a 3 show kung-fu weekend. I'll avoid pics as uploading them would take too much time, and my feet aren't in the best shape. From top to bottom:
Head/neck/shoulders- Oddly enough, cool. After the last run of "KFH" and the fundraiser, I remember distinctly that I could barely move my head to look over my shoulder for almost a month. Now (knock on wood) it feels copacetic.
Arms- Triceps are muy achey from falling a lot and catching my body. The abrasion on my right elbow from the first helicopter attempt is almost healed up (Thanks, neoprene elbow guard!) My wrists (Thanks wrist wraps) have held up from the falls. My elbows, on the other hand have cuts and bruises from an unnamed source. (Falling? Kicking my own ass? I can has cheezburger?) They hurt to rest on my chair.
Chest/Ribs/Tummy- Cool. Tums a little sore from sucking in my gut during my topless scenes and flexing my tummy for support doing my normal Fonkey stuff. Other than that, copacetic.
Legs- The weird thing is my hamstring and groin-y feel fine. Great, in fact. It's a little frassy stretching out after all that high-falutin' kicking etc. But the next day I'm mobile. I've got the makings of a pulled calf on my right leg. I'm actually favoring my right leg due to cracking my knee during the "Streetfighter" dance off with Robbie. Go figure. I have these knee pads which have been a GODsend during the scene where I beat myself up. I normally take them off during my first costume change, although Sunday of all days I left'emon during the course of the show. Except before "Streetfighter"...where I take'em off thinking I wouldn't need'em any more. BEEEEEEP! Wrong answer. First spin on the floor CRACK the knee hits. I get up and Kiseung is there to drag me off but I couldn't put weight on it. Shit. Take off my gi bottoms and whoops. There it is. Big bloody red circle. I skun my knee. I haven't done that since, oh, high school? Rounding out the lot is a bruise on both of my hips into my glutes, exacerbated by a fall on my ass this Sunday. (I go to do a thrust kick to get the Sphinx offstage and due to the dust on the floor my other leg went up too. Ry-gonn thought it was an intentional Suicide drop. Hopefully the 18 other people did too)
Feet/Kankles- Saving the best for last, my dogs look like some one tried shining my shoes with a cheese grater then forgot I wasn't wearing any to begin with. Ugh. My top left has got an owie I think (think?) I eff up everytime I beat myself up. It may come from another part of the show, as Shinobi-wan and Robbie both have similar maladies. Basically I've been hacking up my foot. (And I have one of those annoying cuts in between my little and 2nd toe. If I spread my toes it fricking kills) I've got bruises on both little toe knucks, a bruise on the ball of my right foot, a bruise on my right kankle (Which happens after Jocasta tosses me. Saturday and Sunday both I remind myself to fall correctly. Both times I biff. Durp durp durp)
I felt kinda bad about being the grandpa of the cast until some of the others showed signs of battle fatigue as well. The lesson is, I'm a hazard to myself and I'll probably need a wheel chair by the end of the run.
Doesn't the thread title remind you of day camp/scout camp? 'Member? Whenever you went swimming you had to have a buddy and during random intervals the lifeguard (who looked NOTHING like they did on "Baywatch" would yell "BUDDY CHECK"!!! And you and yer buddy would hold your hands up before they blew the whistle and you could get back to your lake-frass...
No one? What?
Well the show is up and runnin'. Yee Haw. The house have been small, but enthusiastic. And I felt that we finally started to hit our stride on Saturday night in spite of my various attempts at killing my cast. (Chowie walked in to the bad end of the Monk's Spade as I carried it off stage...nearly disemboweling him. Newly gradgitated B-boy Robby took the walking staff to the knuckles like he was in Catholic School during the "Oedipus" sketch. I whacked Shinobi-wan a little too vigorously with a spinning backfist. And lastly I nearly took out the Kat during "Streetfighter" with a well-placed jump spin wheel to the elbow. By the end of the show I was checking to see if there was anyone else who wanted some. And for real, I didn't even have a beer!)
No critics, but some dear folks showed up starting with Joshie on Friday ("I knew you did that stuff...but I didn't know you could DO that stuff!" Warmed my heart) Dorajar and 'Nai on Saturday, and a surprise visit by Ry-Gonn on Sunday. (Please send warmest regards to he and his family. He's going through some ill-gramma frass right now)
So I wanted to post a quick inventory of ailments that comes from a 3 show kung-fu weekend. I'll avoid pics as uploading them would take too much time, and my feet aren't in the best shape. From top to bottom:
Head/neck/shoulders- Oddly enough, cool. After the last run of "KFH" and the fundraiser, I remember distinctly that I could barely move my head to look over my shoulder for almost a month. Now (knock on wood) it feels copacetic.
Arms- Triceps are muy achey from falling a lot and catching my body. The abrasion on my right elbow from the first helicopter attempt is almost healed up (Thanks, neoprene elbow guard!) My wrists (Thanks wrist wraps) have held up from the falls. My elbows, on the other hand have cuts and bruises from an unnamed source. (Falling? Kicking my own ass? I can has cheezburger?) They hurt to rest on my chair.
Chest/Ribs/Tummy- Cool. Tums a little sore from sucking in my gut during my topless scenes and flexing my tummy for support doing my normal Fonkey stuff. Other than that, copacetic.
Legs- The weird thing is my hamstring and groin-y feel fine. Great, in fact. It's a little frassy stretching out after all that high-falutin' kicking etc. But the next day I'm mobile. I've got the makings of a pulled calf on my right leg. I'm actually favoring my right leg due to cracking my knee during the "Streetfighter" dance off with Robbie. Go figure. I have these knee pads which have been a GODsend during the scene where I beat myself up. I normally take them off during my first costume change, although Sunday of all days I left'emon during the course of the show. Except before "Streetfighter"...where I take'em off thinking I wouldn't need'em any more. BEEEEEEP! Wrong answer. First spin on the floor CRACK the knee hits. I get up and Kiseung is there to drag me off but I couldn't put weight on it. Shit. Take off my gi bottoms and whoops. There it is. Big bloody red circle. I skun my knee. I haven't done that since, oh, high school? Rounding out the lot is a bruise on both of my hips into my glutes, exacerbated by a fall on my ass this Sunday. (I go to do a thrust kick to get the Sphinx offstage and due to the dust on the floor my other leg went up too. Ry-gonn thought it was an intentional Suicide drop. Hopefully the 18 other people did too)
Feet/Kankles- Saving the best for last, my dogs look like some one tried shining my shoes with a cheese grater then forgot I wasn't wearing any to begin with. Ugh. My top left has got an owie I think (think?) I eff up everytime I beat myself up. It may come from another part of the show, as Shinobi-wan and Robbie both have similar maladies. Basically I've been hacking up my foot. (And I have one of those annoying cuts in between my little and 2nd toe. If I spread my toes it fricking kills) I've got bruises on both little toe knucks, a bruise on the ball of my right foot, a bruise on my right kankle (Which happens after Jocasta tosses me. Saturday and Sunday both I remind myself to fall correctly. Both times I biff. Durp durp durp)
I felt kinda bad about being the grandpa of the cast until some of the others showed signs of battle fatigue as well. The lesson is, I'm a hazard to myself and I'll probably need a wheel chair by the end of the run.
What I wrote about the kids...
(Kiped from an email I sent to the cast of "GMIKFTH" regarding my present experience with the good teens performing in CHS's version of "KFH". Mention anything in regards to things like "profound affect" or that it's "Dripping with sentiment"? I'll kill ya. I swear. I'm a ninja)
Good Morning, Friends. This may seem a lil' longish, so forgiveness please. If you just want the itty-bitty, scroll to the bitty bottom. It's technically an invite. But an invite...with a story:
As most of y'all know, I'm helping with a High School production of "Kung Fu Hamlet" at CHS in Circle Pines. The genesis of this stems from when my friend, Actor/Director TLC (Who directed "Loot" at TRP, and I've worked for him in other productions nigh on 5-6 years) saw us do "KFH" in January '06. When he got asked to direct Centennial's Spring show he thought "What about 'KFH'?" Well, it fell through and they ended up doing "Mad Woman of Chaillot" or some s#it and the project got tabled.
Fast forward to March-y March of this year and it all ends up falling into place. He asks me to be the Fight choreographer...which I thought was kinda strange since- #1) I feel like I'm one of the less-talented/skilled martial artist's to ever have worked for No Refunds and #2? (Which Chowie is probably thinking "Doesn't #2 means POOP?!") I've never 'Ographed anything before. Much less at a high school. So, I bugged Chowie and Matt for the "KFH" DVD. Watched it. Wrote down the blocking. And made that the abridged outline of my work. That's right. Suck it. I bogarted approximately 80% of the blocking, with some amendments in regards to the more advanced techniques and to make up for the fact that Polonius has not two. Not three. But six monks. Almost all women. More on that in a sec.
(Here is where I insert a humble apology to the cast. The high school show, coupled with our show/the fundraiser/and a 40+ hour work week...Not to mention trying to squeeze in occasional face time w/the lady friend has turned me into a greater flibbertigibbet than normal...forgive me. My mind has become fractured. Like a Phillip K. Dick character. If you read that sort of thing. If you can READ!)
So. The kids. And the show. The meat and gristle of this message. And other frass.
-The biggest one, was trying not to swear. Much.
-None of them have had martial arts training. Our original "Hamlet" had like 2 years of Tung Soo Do when he was 10 or 11, but he up and got kicked out of his house and had to transfer schools. This was week #2 of rehearsals, and we'd already blocked 3/4th's of his fights
-Being that they had no martial arts training, I had to do a rudimentary boot camp showing them the basic "flavor" of the arts which are martial. This included having them stretch daily (Even when I'm not there. I told the SM that she was the movement coach) Deep stances. Closed fists. Head up (Tall guys are all STOOPING! Don't STOOP! HORSEBACK STANCE!)
-Making sure my "Bad-A$$-Lady-Monks" (The "B.A.L.M.'s") don't say "Sorry" (I banned the word from fight rehearsals) That they stop smiling/giggling ("Ladies? I need your 'Mean face'...Katryn? Stop it. Stop....no...stop giggling! You HATE Hamlet!") And that they are less than two feet away when they "hit" someone. ("Dani? I don't know much, but I'm pretty sure your punch didn't land from way back there. Stop giggling!")
-Teaching the two "Best Friends since 2nd Grade" Laertes and Ophelia pak sao (A feat I'm actually quite tickled about. They are so gung-ho, it warms the heart. It helps that I told our SM, again, to make them practice-every. Day. And then found out they did anyway outside of rehearsals, in the band equipment room where no one was watching)
-Enduring being called "Mr. "
-Telling "Yummy"-"Good intensity, Yummy" (These kids with there nicknames. Bless his heart, the most awkward kid ever he's working so hard)
-Being an innovator and re-casting Hamlet with a woman. ("Ashley". A dancer. She gets crabby when I ask her to turn her foot a certain way. "That's NOT how I was trained".)
-Explaining to them that "No, I've never killed someone with karate" and that "Yes, I've seriously injured people with karate"
-Enduring (again) Ashley's litany of commentary/questions ("How old are you?"/"Why do you have facial hair? Are you TRYING to grow a beard?"/"Is your nose broken? It looks crooked"/"My boyfriend does NOT look like Sanjaya...he's Mormon!"/"I'm sore"/"I'm tired"/"Why would you ever want to learn that?!?" That last question is my favorite, as it came after I explained "Tiger Claw" and how it could feasibly rend flesh.) And the best bit? She's doing every thing I ask. Great success.
-Discussing Prom, then showing them my old Prom pics and having them (The whole frickin' cast and Terry) stay after rehearsal one night while I told them Prom horror stories. I've never had a rapt audience like that.
-And the really best bit? Is watching it all start to come together. They're really working hard. And I think having a lot of fun. All thanks to a goofy lil' idea hatched by Chowie/Matt/and Gabe-pril
So here's the deal- Next Thursday, May 10th they open and it's the only day I can go- 7:30 pm. If you'd like to go as well, I'd like the company. Tickets are $4-$6 (I know. I haven't seen ticket prices that low in the 9-odd years I've been working in TC theatres)
Thanks for your support and dealing with my frass. And I hope you can make it.
Good Morning, Friends. This may seem a lil' longish, so forgiveness please. If you just want the itty-bitty, scroll to the bitty bottom. It's technically an invite. But an invite...with a story:
As most of y'all know, I'm helping with a High School production of "Kung Fu Hamlet" at CHS in Circle Pines. The genesis of this stems from when my friend, Actor/Director TLC (Who directed "Loot" at TRP, and I've worked for him in other productions nigh on 5-6 years) saw us do "KFH" in January '06. When he got asked to direct Centennial's Spring show he thought "What about 'KFH'?" Well, it fell through and they ended up doing "Mad Woman of Chaillot" or some s#it and the project got tabled.
Fast forward to March-y March of this year and it all ends up falling into place. He asks me to be the Fight choreographer...which I thought was kinda strange since- #1) I feel like I'm one of the less-talented/skilled martial artist's to ever have worked for No Refunds and #2? (Which Chowie is probably thinking "Doesn't #2 means POOP?!") I've never 'Ographed anything before. Much less at a high school. So, I bugged Chowie and Matt for the "KFH" DVD. Watched it. Wrote down the blocking. And made that the abridged outline of my work. That's right. Suck it. I bogarted approximately 80% of the blocking, with some amendments in regards to the more advanced techniques and to make up for the fact that Polonius has not two. Not three. But six monks. Almost all women. More on that in a sec.
(Here is where I insert a humble apology to the cast. The high school show, coupled with our show/the fundraiser/and a 40+ hour work week...Not to mention trying to squeeze in occasional face time w/the lady friend has turned me into a greater flibbertigibbet than normal...forgive me. My mind has become fractured. Like a Phillip K. Dick character. If you read that sort of thing. If you can READ!)
So. The kids. And the show. The meat and gristle of this message. And other frass.
-The biggest one, was trying not to swear. Much.
-None of them have had martial arts training. Our original "Hamlet" had like 2 years of Tung Soo Do when he was 10 or 11, but he up and got kicked out of his house and had to transfer schools. This was week #2 of rehearsals, and we'd already blocked 3/4th's of his fights
-Being that they had no martial arts training, I had to do a rudimentary boot camp showing them the basic "flavor" of the arts which are martial. This included having them stretch daily (Even when I'm not there. I told the SM that she was the movement coach) Deep stances. Closed fists. Head up (Tall guys are all STOOPING! Don't STOOP! HORSEBACK STANCE!)
-Making sure my "Bad-A$$-Lady-Monks" (The "B.A.L.M.'s") don't say "Sorry" (I banned the word from fight rehearsals) That they stop smiling/giggling ("Ladies? I need your 'Mean face'...Katryn? Stop it. Stop....no...stop giggling! You HATE Hamlet!") And that they are less than two feet away when they "hit" someone. ("Dani? I don't know much, but I'm pretty sure your punch didn't land from way back there. Stop giggling!")
-Teaching the two "Best Friends since 2nd Grade" Laertes and Ophelia pak sao (A feat I'm actually quite tickled about. They are so gung-ho, it warms the heart. It helps that I told our SM, again, to make them practice-every. Day. And then found out they did anyway outside of rehearsals, in the band equipment room where no one was watching)
-Enduring being called "Mr. "
-Telling "Yummy"-"Good intensity, Yummy" (These kids with there nicknames. Bless his heart, the most awkward kid ever he's working so hard)
-Being an innovator and re-casting Hamlet with a woman. ("Ashley". A dancer. She gets crabby when I ask her to turn her foot a certain way. "That's NOT how I was trained".)
-Explaining to them that "No, I've never killed someone with karate" and that "Yes, I've seriously injured people with karate"
-Enduring (again) Ashley's litany of commentary/questions ("How old are you?"/"Why do you have facial hair? Are you TRYING to grow a beard?"/"Is your nose broken? It looks crooked"/"My boyfriend does NOT look like Sanjaya...he's Mormon!"/"I'm sore"/"I'm tired"/"Why would you ever want to learn that?!?" That last question is my favorite, as it came after I explained "Tiger Claw" and how it could feasibly rend flesh.) And the best bit? She's doing every thing I ask. Great success.
-Discussing Prom, then showing them my old Prom pics and having them (The whole frickin' cast and Terry) stay after rehearsal one night while I told them Prom horror stories. I've never had a rapt audience like that.
-And the really best bit? Is watching it all start to come together. They're really working hard. And I think having a lot of fun. All thanks to a goofy lil' idea hatched by Chowie/Matt/and Gabe-pril
So here's the deal- Next Thursday, May 10th they open and it's the only day I can go- 7:30 pm. If you'd like to go as well, I'd like the company. Tickets are $4-$6 (I know. I haven't seen ticket prices that low in the 9-odd years I've been working in TC theatres)
Thanks for your support and dealing with my frass. And I hope you can make it.
Friday, May 04, 2007
Oof, and Woot
Ugh. Tired. I'll post my frassy thoughts on "S3" later. We open tonight. Go see my show!
That is all. Off to nap, practice o'graphy, dress, hit the theatre, do show, have drink.
In that order.
Frass!
That is all. Off to nap, practice o'graphy, dress, hit the theatre, do show, have drink.
In that order.
Frass!
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