It's been a busy 2 months, yo. I won't lie. Between Summer coming to a swift and abrupt close and cramming new cabin (aka "Camp Awesome") time in, Ren Fest and the State Fair, and launching into a pretty intensive rehearsal/performance schedule in the Kung Fu show with Muper Forming Arts- I barely had time to breathe, much less write.
HOWever-
I was finally able to skip town, proper skip town, and go on a real-live-big kid vacation. In case you're keeping track, this is the 1st vacation I've had in over 5 years. Okay? This means job loss, loss of a parent, etc etc etc...What I'm saying is I think I've earned it.
Ranch's grandparents were celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary down in Sun City, AZ and I was invited to come down for the festivities. After some planning, we reckoned we'd fly into Vegas, make the 4 hour trek to AZ, then come back 2 days later after and spend some time putzing around Vegas-proper.
I should disclose that I've made a few trips to Vegas. The Southwest is my heart. It's bright. It's obnoxious. Ticket prices and drink prices and food prices can be a$$-rapingly exorbitant. AND? I don't gamble. I should hate Vegas. But I don't. It's a 3-Day town. (Three days and out.) And s#it, deep within this blog is probably a post or three about my last few trips. Point is, I'm comfortable enough navigating and playing tour guide that it felt like a fresh way to hit up the Strip.
My s.o.'d never been. Oh sure, she's travelled and learned around the globe...my issue is that VEGAS proper is the kind of town that might overwhelm the uninitiated. And my deep-rooted need to be a hero meant I wanted her to have a good time. And good time we did. Lot's of walking the Strip. Lot's of sleeping in. A brief infection scare. And a final night at a naughty Cirque show. All told? A great trip. (Although we missed a few things due to said sickness) And to tailhook back to the title of the post- I present you with some of her greatest hits:
-You can smoke anywhere?
-It's so CUTE!!! (The rental company gave us a yellow FIAT, aka "The banana suppository". It was then, I realized we wouldn't be able to haggle over a "true" mid-sized car and were stuck in the equivalent of a Nuprin on wheels.)
-"Well. Some guy at check-in told me he could grab my boobs if I wanted."
-"AMAYYYYZING!"
-"That's AMAAAYZING!!!" (This was a repeated theme.)
-"Well. Two drag queens arguing in the make-up section of CVS. On Sunday at 10a.m. Like ya do."
-"My boss thinks it'd be funny if we checked in at a drive-thru wedding chapel." (So I did. Fast forward to a gazillion comments on FB...buhwahhahahaha...NOTE! This did NOT have the same effect when I checked us in at a tattoo parlor.)
-"Why would you even WANT to get married here?"
- (With great disgust) "Oh. Carrot Top"
-"I think that's Rod Stewart! Is that Rod Stewart!" (Impersonator)
-"Oh...my GOD!" (Repeated line during the Cirque show.)
-"I've never been to a town that has SO much p0rn being advertised!"
-"It was $32?!?!?" (The vodka lemonade poolside.)
-"What is up with chicks wearing lacy bikini tops? They like wearing underwear to the pool?"
-"We are NOT renting a p0rno!!!"
Finally: "I can never sleep on planes. I don't know why."
We'll come back, Vegas. We've the North end of the strip and Fremont street yet to conquer.
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