There is everything nerdy about this post.
So...in my youth I collected funny books. I've probably written about it before. I was small-change, of course. We had a drawer of comics at the cabin to keep us occupied, and there were a few compilations we had at home (mostly Spider-Man) but my thing was always cartoons. Because we had some fucking stellar Saturday Morning cartoons in the 70's and 80's. I digress.
Having some new (meaning- recently transferred in the 5th grade) friends who were in to comics put me on the path to nerd glory. It would have been around when my "Doctor Who" jones was waning, there weren't any super-hero properties in the theater or television like we have now, and while I was bitten by the comic bug- I wasn't as fanatical as those two kids were. (I stuck primarily with what I could afford, namely "X" titles.) What it did do, was give me an education on funny books- the different publishers, artists. Like my brother's analogy about martial arts: "Enough to make me dangerous, but not enough to go pro".
Anyway...I'm off to Bemidji for theater Summer camp again. And I thought it'd be funny (because: Me.) if I had some "college-y" posters to put up in my dorm room. I found some in the basement and while I was rooting around in the rubbage I decided to pop open my sealed Box-O-Comics
It's at this point that I should mention that I feel no shame in still having them instead of unloading them at a comic shop for $5. I never really saw them as an investment, in spite of having some cherry 1st appearance issues in there. And what I want on internet record is that it's REALLY AWESOME TO BE IN THEATER AND KNOW PEOPLE WHO LOVE COMICS. It's like a sub-sub group of nerdy solidarity. And it's great.
So in there, I have a particularly "non" cherry issue of the famous comic story line "Days of Future Past" (pictured above in a VERY spoiler-y cover). The non-cherry part comes from the fact that I found it at a garage sale and- knowing how "famous" the story was? Bought it. Innnnnnnn spite of the fact that the cover was splattered in blue tempura paint and torn at the top.
So. In an act unbecoming a 12-year-old, I began my brief career in art forgery. I carefully and lovingly cleaned off the cover with a damp sponge and allowed it to dry. I then purchased a new issue of "Uncanny X-Men" (that I already had. This was probably around #214 or so. Post "Mutant Massacre") and used an X-Acto knife (IRONY!) to remove the "X" and glue it on the ruined issue.
Go on. Look at the craftmanship. I'll wait.
Yeah. Shoddy job. I just wanted a clean cover so I could bag it and hang it on my walls with the rest. (My design ethic circa 1986 was "Comic Store Chic") My only "real" claim to fame in my collection was that for some weird reason I felt the need to start collecting back issues starting with "Uncanny" #170 and then go forward. Funny enough, after enough years had passed and I'd moved away from collecting- only to become friends with adult collectors that I learned it wasn't weird at all. (Before the movies, a co-worker of mine at Target was collecting *every* appearance of Iron Man starting with his 1st appearance in "Tales of Suspense". And he did it. And looooook how far his love of a total "B" character has come in 12 years.)
Anyway, it took all of my willpower to *not* sit down and start re-reading and organizing. In fact, I only pulled some of these choice titles to show my friend Sam, who (along with Carl, Eric, Glen, Michael, etc etc etc etc) would appreciate them.
On an unrelated note? I just lent my S.O. the 1st three graphic novels of "Sandman". It's important because I only recently completed collecting all ten of the series and you could kiiiiind of say my friend Glen lending me the series back in 1998 or so is what put me back on the path to loving/appreciating comics.
Enjoy.
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| The pull bin. At the top left, you'll see a one-shot of the Mignola inked "Wolverine". Now, kids, there was a time when every super-hero team roster didn't have Wolverine in it. In fact, I coveted anything that had his name on it even if it was a crossover with Alpha Flight PROMISING a 'partial' origin story. |
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| If...for some reason...this title doesn't make you want to scream for a Huge Ackman/Captain 'Merica throwdown? Nothing will. Also? There's a LOT of humanity in this. As well as Cap "chopping" his shield into Wolvie's hands in order to help him cut the head off a marauding robot. Don't act like it's not awesome. |
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| You'd never think...when you pick these up...that a "first appearance" would spawn a character so iconic. And I didn't even like the issue that much, because even when I was in my early teens Liefeld was a joke. (True story- while I stuck mainly with Marvel and some DC, I had a friend bring in a -in my words- "crappy" black and white one-shot that he thought was awesome. He was into manga, big time, and appreciated the ninja story line- however he said it was a 3rd reprint so it wasn't too valuable. I ended up digging it after a while, but who'd have thought "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" would have been a thing? Not in 1986 they weren't. |
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| So...I guess - and this is mildly spoilery- the X movies are heading toward an Apocalypse storyline. That's fine. I just remember *deeply* that he and Mr. Sinister started a marked trend toward the dreaded crossover...and you couldn't follow the stories for shit unless you bought 8 alternate titles. And there was no fucking way I was buying "Fantastic Four" or "Power Pack'. You know I'm right. |
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| I pulled this monstrosity b/c I started...to have feelings...very specific feelings...about werewolves. I hit a "horror movie" phase when comics started to lose their luster in my eyes. As such, I'd grab crossover goodies like this one even though I could care less about the title. In other words, it's like you love professional baseball so much that you don't care that you're watching the little league world series on ESPN even though that's fucking stupid as hell. What's wrong with you? |
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| Ok. This'll probably get earnest collectors and enthusiasts in a tizzy. At the cabin, we had "ZERO" cares whether a comic had a non-acid cardboard backing and was bagged. These were all in a drawer to be carelessly pulled out and read and re-read on rainy days we couldn't be out playing Jarts or Trac-Ball. Also, "cool" titles like Bats up there where shuffled in with Archie, Little Lulu, and Casper. Also? There was this weird habit of writing the name of the owner on the front page out of...proprietorship? So what you're seeing above is a great example of a 46 year old Batman reprint, sans cover and covered in pen ink. Sorry world. |
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| Why I loved this comic? Because of shit like this. Nobody cared what Batman had in his utility belt, only that it contained utilities...except me. For me, it was like a "How-To" guide to being a superhero, something a desperately wanted to be my entire life. My entire...life. My...entire...life...Oh gods...I'm sorry. I need to drink now. |
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| Or the Batcave! Look at all the SHIT he has! We just had forts, and tents, and lean-to's, and Huffy's. The basement of his HOUSE had all this shit! I tried bringing my bike into the basement in order to ride it up a make-shift ramp, into the garage, then out the front door. My mom asked me what I was doing, and I was promptly made to return my bike to the shed. Kids...don't let your mother's kill your dreams. You bring your goddamn bike in the house. Do it. |
